Things to do on 11.11.11…

∙ First jump on 1 leg, then jump on 1 more leg. (11)
Then balance your body on 1 hand then on 1 more hand. (11)
Then bang your head against 1 wall, then 1 other. (11)
Repeat this process when the time is 11.11.11.

∙ 11.11.11 in the morning on the date 11.11.11 is so rare that there will be a never seen before heavenly alignment that will grant every wish to everyone who asks it, no matter how fantastic.
The wish will come true after 111111111111 years.

∙ If you have a stopwatch, then try to stop it at (11 hours 11 minutes 11.11 seconds) and frame it till, 2111.11.11.

∙ Watch Ra.One twice, then it will become Ra.OneOne or Ra.11.

∙ If you want to do good charity work, give 11 Rupees to 11 beggars at 11.11.11.
Richer people can give 11(hundred, thousand, lakh…) accordingly.

∙ At exactly 11.11.11, jump on 1 leg 111111 times.

∙ On the order of Pope Gregory XIII, the world went straight from October 4, 1582 to October 15, 1582 as a result of calendar adjustment.
Since we lost those days, purists can celebrate all of the above on November 22.

© Sunil Rajguru

Cape Town Collapso musings

∙ How do you boil an egg in Cape Town?
A: You put water and an egg in a pan, put on the flame and wait for 9 Aussie wickets to fall.

∙ You may have heard of 2-in-1s and 3-in-1s.
Well they’ve just launched 4-in-1s in cricket.
At least one ball of all four Test innings was bowled in a day.

∙ Pakistan match-fixers are studying the tremendous Australian collapse for tips on how to do it better in the future.

∙ When an Aussie fan heard that his team was 21/9, he thought that a new T10 tournament had been launched.

∙ Today Australia joins the League of Extraordinary Collapsers which already boasts of West Indies, Pakistan and India as their members.

∙ It’s being called Australia’s greatest fight back in their history.
The last wicket put on 124% of the runs put on by the first nine wickets combined.
(21/9 to 47 all down)

∙ Today the ICC has decided to launch a new team called Michael Clarke. Here are the scores across two innings…
Michael Clarke: 153 All Down
Australia: 178 All Down

∙ Let’s round it off with some bakwaas shaayari…
pitch nahin ditch hai,
History nahin mystery hai,
Michael Clarke nahin Clarke Kent hai,
Ten Wickets nahin Nine Pins hai…

Reference: First Test, Australia-South Africa at Cape Town (November 9).

© Sunil Rajguru

Sachin Mahashatak musings…

(Mahashatak = Sachin Tendulkar’s 100th International Century)

∙ It has been 243 days since Sachin last scored a century.
At this rate, he will celebrate two birthdays in 2012.
One is on April 24 when he turns 38.
But before that will be March 12, when the Mahashatak Quest turns One!

Crore-o logon ki nazar Sachin ke Mahashatak par hain.
Aila, nazar lag gayi!

∙ Sachin ka sauwa shatak gaya tel lene has a new meaning with some people speculating that petrol prices will touch Rs 100 a litre before the Mahashatak happens!

∙ Someone please organize a Bangladesh-Zimbabwe-India ODI triangular series and Sachin can score his 100th ton and we all can quietly move on in life and cricket.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru