The tragedy that is Manmohan…

Manmohan Singh should officially get the title of…
Punching Bag of the Nation.

Kabhi Modi ne maara,
kabhi SM ne maara,
kabhi Pappu ne maara,
kabhi Nawaz ne bhi maara,
main Manmohan hu yaaro,
mujhe har kisi ne maara…

De-evolution of Manmohan…
1. Spineless human.
–>2. Lame duck.
–>3. Totally legless.
–>4. Headless chicken.
–>5. Dead as a Dodo.

Manmohan running India…
2004: Look Madam, no spine!
2008: Look Madam, no morals!
2013: Look Madam, no pride!
2014: Look Madam, no country!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Pappu trashes convicted lawmakers ordinance 2…

Looks like they are planning to replace “Sonia is unhappy” with “Pappu is angry”!

Sometime in the future…
Pappu: What is the Cabinet discussing?
Advisor: Oh, some nonsense!

Who actually trashed the Ordinance?
If it’s Pappu, then hats off to him.
But if it was Pranabda, then it’s a case of chori followed by grandstanding seena zori.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Pappu trashes convicted lawmakers ordinance…

In George Orwell’s 1984, there is a scene where a leader is giving a speech to a huge crowd and in the middle of it, he is given instructions and suddenly starts speaking exactly the opposite…
A similar Pappu moment just happened in India in 2014!

Sonia: OK, get ready to sit in the Opposition.
Pappu: I oppose the Government. Nonsense, tear it up…
Sonia: Sigh! That’s not what I meant.

How many Congress leaders must be doing a facepalm behind closed doors saying “Nautanki sala!”?

Advisor: Sir another attack on you!
PM: Who is it this time? Modi? Twitter? Pak?
Advisor: This time it’s Pappu!

The UPA story…
Manmohan: Yes, we can!
Sonia/Pappu: No, you can’t!

Pappu: Aaj kuch toofani karte hai!
Pranabda: Actually that’s called stealing my thunder!

Supreme Court supports Right to Reject.
Pappu Rejects convicted netas Ordinance.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Congress, BJP and 2014…

The Congress really admires Srinivasan.
At least he managed to ban one Modi and keep him out of India.

UPA ke peeche kya hai? Congress.
Congress ke peeche kya hai? Manmohan.
Manmohan ke peeche kya hai? Sonia.
Sonia ke peeche kya hai?
Koi nahin. The buck stops with her.

PM MMS.
Puppet Master’s Maun “Mute” Servant.

Food Security Bill is the Aadhar for the Congress National Rahul Employment Guarantee Act from 2014-19.

Kennedy had “Ich bin ein Berliner” in German.
Looks like Modi wants a similar phrase in every single Indian language.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The politics of India today…

How BJP is more evil than Congress…
90% of scams and riots committed under Congress regimes.
90% of scam and riot coverage given to BJP regimes.

A handful of people will want to leave India if Modi becomes PM.
But if we have a UPA3, then emigration will be the only option for many.

Nitish: We are turning Bihar into US.
Q: How?
Nitish: Well for a start, we are denying Narendra Modi a visa to enter Bihar.

They don’t want to ban Opinion Polls.
They want to ban Opinions.

Within you are the seeds of your own destruction…
soNiA MainO

Manmohan is starring in the reality movie…
Bharat Ko Jalakar Raakh Kar Doonga.

Once a President said that he would sweep the floor for a Madam Prime Minister.
Today a Prime Minister would probably do the same for a Madam President.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Social networking and riots…

Weapons of mass destruction…
An Afghani girl with a schoolbook.
A Kashmiri girl with a guitar.
An Indian citizen with a Facebook/Twitter account.

Once they used to blame the Foreign Hand for everything.
Now they blame the FBTwitter handle.

Please spell Internet.
Politician: Interiot.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru