Modi kuch bhi kare, credit Congress ko jaata hai

Modi is tech savvy.
Par computers to Rajiv laya tha!
Modi is mending ties with Bangladesh.
Par Bangladesh to Indira layi thi!
Modi is reforming India.
Par Manmohan reforms laya tha!
Modi is transforming foreign policy.
Par foreign policy to Nehru laya tha!
Modi is building a strong party.
Par political party to Congress laya tha!
Modi is taking India to new heights.
Par India to Mahatma Gandhi laya tha!

General random political musings…

2014…
Pradhan Mantri Jan Dhan Yojana.
2016…
Pradhan Mantri Kala Dhan Yojana.

Paap Ko Jalaa Kar Raakh Kar Doonga.
#Dharmendra1988 #Modi2016

#AdarshLiberal
If India is bad, you will support Pakistan?
If Capitalism is bad, you will support Communism?
If Indian Army is bad, you will support terrorists?

#Pappu
2000s: Angry young man.
2010s: Angry middle-aged man.
2020s: Angry old man.
2030s: Angry retired man.

#Dharmendra1988
Paap Ko Jalaa Kar Raakh Kar Doonga.
Kejri: Replace paap with New Delhi.
Lalu: Bihar for me.
Didi: 2 changes, West Bengal and last letter i.

Bihar’s MahaGatbandhan cannot be replicated in Uttar Pradesh.
It will become MahaGadbad.

Eat in a Dalit’s hut.
Take a few months off.
Travel in a Mumbai local.
Take a few months off.
Stand in an ATM queue.
Take a few months off.
#PappuPolitics

The glorious 2010s…
___got re-elected and destroyed___
1. Laloo-Bihar.
2. Mulayam-UP.
3. Kejri-Delhi.

Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.
Fool me a million times since 1947 and you’re the Indian Left and I’m an ordinary citizen.

In cricketing parlance, Modi is a captain who has won the World Cup while Pappu is still on the benches of a Ranji team.
Media will equalize them in 2019.

All Congress spokespersons get up every morning with the same thought.
How do I rubbish Modi’s achievements today?

Past tense…
Modi has won many times.
Present tense…
Modi is winning everything.
Future tense…
Modi will lose each and every time.
#Haters

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Never in the history of Indian politics…

Never in the history of India has a person with so many talents and achievements been attacked so much.
#Modi

Never in the history of India has a person with so little talent and achievements been admired so much.
#Sonia

Never in the history of India has a person with so much crime, misgovernance and incompetence been adored so much.
#Lalu

Never in the history of India has a person got these many opportunities and this much coverage and exposure and flopped such.
#Pappu

Never in the history of India has a person with this much education and support proved to be such a selfish incompetent duffer in the world of politics.
#Kejri

© Sunil Rajguru

Political musings of the day…

The Leftist lobby in India has about 1000 pseudo-intellectuals and exactly zero real intellectuals.

Sonia had zero talent zero experience zero achievements, so what happened from 2004-14 is not surprising.
Modi established his political talent and had many achievements, so what’s happening after 2014 is also not surprising.

Pre-2014.
#BlowToModi
#BlowToModi
#BlowToModi
#BlowToModi
Post-2014.
#BlowToPakistan
#BlowToAdarshLiberals
#BlowToKejri
#BlowToPappu

#AdarshLiberals keep harping on the Idea of India #IoI but in fact they only support the Idea of Pakistan #IoP.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The never ending Indian political musings…

1000 crimes in WB—Yawn!!!
1000 crimes in Bihar—I love Lalu!!!
1000 crimes in UP—Ignore till Dadri.
1 crime in Modi’s BJP-ruled State—This is Sparta!!!

Student: Bharat tere tukde!
Liberal: Wah wah! Maja aa gaya!
Citizen: Bharat Mata ki Jai!
Liberal: Sanghi! Bigot!
Arnab: India first!
Liberal: Pathetic journalism!

#‎SleepingBeautyRahul‬
Ye bechaara kaam ka maara, ise chaahiye chhutkaara.
Congress: Par hum denge ise party President ka tiara.

Advisor: Apologize or we will have a lengthy court case.
Pappu: Suits me. I have nothing to do. Ye sab accha time pass hai!
‪#‎RSSCase‬

In 2009 the BJP was done and dusted.
Social Media biggest factor in its revival.
If BJP cracks down on Social Media, backlash will be colossal.

Log poochte hain ki Modi sahab videsh main itna khush kyun rahate hai.
Arre bhai Bharat main to kucch log unko 24X7 gaali dete hai, to kaise khush rahe?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

In how many steps can you reach Modi?

Udta Punjab shows how bad the situation of Punjab is.
Punjab is ruled by the Badals.
Badals are aligned with the BJP.
BJP = Modi!

Udta Punjab was almost banned by censor board.
Censor board chief is Pahalaj Nihalini.
Nihalini was appointed by I&B Ministry.
I&B Minister reports to Modi.

Or simply…

Dadri is a sign of worsening law and order in the country.
This country is ruled by Modi.

There is intolerance in the country.
This country is ruled by Modi.

The economy of this country is going nowhere.
This country is ruled by Modi.

© Sunil Rajguru

Modi bashing musings…

Only sitting PM to give interview to private channel.
World’s No. 2 Twitter politician.
Innovative monthly Mann ki Baat.
1000+ speeches already.
Verdict: He doesn’t communicate!

Congress: You are biased! You interviewed Modi!
Arnab: OK, let me interview Pappu once again!
Congress: Arre, aap to serious ho gaye!

So basically if India wins, it’s so what?
But if India loses, it’s Modi’s humiliation.
‪#‎NSG‬

Amazing how many Indians are cheering India’s loss.
I guess for them Modi is India. India is Modi.
Indira worshippers can’t think any different.
‪#‎NSG‬

Modi cleaning up the mess.
Hater—Kyun kar rahe ho ye sab? Nehru ka kachra bhi sundar hai!
‪#‎NSG‬

Today is “International Yoga Day”.
Every day is “National I Won’t Support Whatever Modi Supports Day”.

When anything goes wrong.
Pre-2014…
Bhagwaan jaane kya ho raha hai. Uski marzi.
Post-2014…
Modi jaane kya ho raha hai. Uski galti.

First they attacked Modi directly, then his right hand Shah.
Then they fired from shoulders of Kejri, Lalu and even Kanhaiya.
Now even Arnab bashing will do!

Is Kejri a politician or an anti-Modi propagandist?

‪#‎NSG‬ was formed as a reaction to Pokhran-I.
So when we finally enter it, I guess Congress will give Indira credit.

Right hands.
Nehru’s held no post (Indira).
Vajpayee’s was his Principal Secretary.
Sonia’s is the non-entity Ahmed Patel.
Modi’s is the BJP President.

‪#‎NSG‬ = Nehru Se Gaya.
NSG phir gaya = Nehru ke vanshaj naach rahe hai.
Permanent security council seat bhi Nehru se gaya.
Woh nahin mila to dugna naachenge.

It has reached such a dire situation that if India has a war with an enemy country, “they” would support the enemy just to spite Modi.
‪#‎NSG‬

Arguments being readied…
1. He couldn’t even get NSG.
2. We don’t need no NSG.
3. NSG got because of efforts of past governments.

2019 slogan.
Pappu. Pappini. Vadra. Kejri. Kanhaiya. Lalu. Nitish. Mamata.
Anyone for PM but Modi.

This is called offline trolling.
First let Rajan go.
Then immediately announce major reforms.
Sensex khush hua.Indian Politics 101

Pre-2014…
Dancer is censor chief.
Multiple film cuts and bans are nobody’s fault.
Post-2014…
Every cut and ban is Modi’s fault.

Hardline supporters of zero-qualified UPA debacle mastermind shall be called intellectuals.
Mild supporters of self-made Modi shall be called trolls.

2009.
Pappu will get 272 next time. Wah wah!
2014.
Modi gets 282 but…
31% mandate! Hate politics.
2016.
Still secretly praying for Pappu.
Still fighting Modi.

Hound an elected CM for 12 years, then refuse to accept people’s verdict making him PM = True democracy.
Merely don’t review RBI Governor term = Democracy under threat.

Chetan Chauhan’s appointment was decided by Gangwar, not Modi.
But Rajan’s exit was decided by Modi, not Swamy.
Outrage accordingly.

Sonia-MMS hired all jokers.
No problem with 0%.
Modi hired good Foreign, Railways, Power, Infrastructure Ministers…
But they want 100%.

Sonia is most unqualified Congress President in its history.
Pappu will break that record.
But outrage 24X7 over every appointment under Modi.

It appears that Pappu took a vow in 2009 to destroy the Congress in 10 years.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Musings in the Modi era…

Pappu: I am tearing up this ordinance.
Singhvi: The ordinance was eaten by termites.

BJP slogan…
Centre main Narendra,
State main Devendra.
Pseudo-secular alliance slogan…
Centre main Damaad,
State main Damaad.
‪#‎Vadra‬ ‪#‎Manjhi‬ ‪#‎AreYouSerious‬

We are entering an age of Pappu politics when it comes to a political dynasty…
‪#‎Rahul‬ ‪#‎Akhilesh‬ ‪#‎YSR‬ ‪#‎Omar‬ ‪#‎Uddhav‬ ‪#‎Raj‬ ‪#‎Ajit‬ ‪#‎Rane‬ ‪#‎Karti‬ ‪#‎Azhagiri‬ ‪#‎Khurshid‬

Modi: Where are you going?
Jaitley: To launch the book written by someone who claims he’s not anti-Modi and with you prominently on the cover.
Modi: OK.
Jaitley: Phew!

Q: What’s the one thing that unites diverse leaders like Nehru, Sonia, Srinivasan and Manjhi?
A: Damaad woes.
‪#‎AreYouSerious‬?

Lone: Can we have a tie-up with the BJP?
Modi: Sure. Stand in the queue behind PDP and NC. Counter opens after results are declared.
‪#‎2015Polls‬

The irony…
Bharadwaj: PC totally responsible for 2G.
Collective Responsibility of Constitution: PM is responsible for Minister’s scams.
P.S. MMS reported to Madam.

The Congress and the Third and Fourth Fronts should actually get together and launch the Second Front to give a serious challenge to the BJP.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Modi-BJP musings…

A DD news anchor read XI Jinping as 11 (Eleven) Jinping.
A Chinese anchor should take revenge and read MODI as 1000-0-500-1.

Under Modi paradoxically both Indo-China co-operation and rivalry will increase.

Analysis in advance…
BJP wins: (It was) Communal Polarization.
BJP loses: Communal Polarization (didn’t work).
‪#‎Bypolls‬

Strange…
BJP hires partisan BJP leaders for Governors.
–>Hmm, OK.
BJP hires neutral former Chief Justice for post.
–>All hell breaks loose.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

BJP government musings…

Take out the Dynasty from the Congress.
Take out Modi from the BJP.
And you’re suddenly left with two eerily similar parties.

You can take the BJP out of the Opposition,
But you can’t take the Opposition out of the BJP.
#TVDebates

If the BJP boycotted TV debates, then their TRP ratings would go down, but the BJP wouldn’t lose any seats in Parliament.
Seems they think it’s the other way round.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Random musings on indian politics…

The C in Congress stands for Communist.
The C in Civil Society stands for Communist.
The C in seCular stands for Communist.
The C in TMC stands for Communist.

It’s OK to blame Modi for Delhi power cuts. At least he’s PM.
For 2-3 years, a State CM was being attacked 24X7 even as a PM was destroying the country.

Looking at TV debates, it seems that some BJP leaders still believe that they are in the Opposition.

33% of India hasn’t been electrified.
Maybe 50% of those electrified face power shortages.
Judging by TV reports, power cuts in Delhi are 100% national calamity.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Yet another round of Modi musings…

The biggest Opposition to the Congress has been the Congress.
The biggest Opposition to Narendra Modi is the BJP.

The Modi Industry…
Stage 1: Fame.
Stage 2: Fortune.
Stage 3: Industry Status.
Stage 4: Very own political party.

The AAP media marriage…
Stage 1: Honeymoon.
Stage 2: Marital fights.
Stage 3: Divorce.
(When it comes to Modi-media, it looks like the reverse)

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, and finally they scramble to be your ally partner.
#NaMo #NDA #2014Polls

These versions by Sunil Rajguru