Congress crisis musings…

If you support Kejri, you are an honest sincere human being.
If you support Pappu you are neutral.
But if you support Modi you are communal, Fascist and irrational.

Congress workers renamed a toilet after Rishi Kapoor under the following scheme…
Rajiv Gandhi Shauchalya Ka Naam Badlo Yojana.

Modi approval ratings 2014-19…
Aam junta: 2/3rds approve.
‪#‎AdarshLiberals‬: 2/300ths approve.

The Congress Priyanka ‪#‎2019Polls‬ dilemma…
Get her in too soon and she gets exposed.
Get her late and voters already decided to give Modi second term.

A severe Congress reshuffle would mean…
Senior President: Sonia.
Senior Vice President: Rahul.
Junior Vice President: Priyanka.
Mascot: Vadra.

In 2009 they told us Sonia best bet for India.
In 2014 they told us Mera Pappu Mahaan.
In 2019 they’ll say Priyanka greatest ever.

Congress then…
How can Amitabh share the stage with a person like Modi!
Now…
How can Modi share the stage with a person like Amitabh!

I am ready to die for Sonia.
I pledge allegiance to Sonia.
Madamji at your feet.
Arundhati isn’t an independent and mobile republic, Sonia is!

Madhavrao Scindia-Rajesh Pilot left us.
Pranabda is Prez.
No really strong Chief Minister.
Let’s face it. Pappu’s still the best bet.

1885-1920: Indian National Congress
1920-48: Congress (Mahatma)
1948-66: Congress (Nehru)
1966-2014: Congress (Indira)
2014-__: Congress (Pappu)

Dare to think beyond Dynasty?
Sonia should retire. Who should take over?
Pappu!
But Pappu has failed.
Priyanka?
Kucch naya socho!
Vadra?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Really bad governance musings…

Congress unleashed violence on CPM.
CPM unleashed violence on Trinamool.
Trinamool unleashing violence on BJP.
Looks like the way to pass on power.
BJP looks good for 2021.

Reduce power bills.
Mismanage to ensure power cuts.
Penalize power cos and compensate consumers.
In the process run out of both electricity and money.
‪#‎Kejri‬

Emergency protests produced some politicians worse than Indira’s lackeys.
2011 protests produced some politicians worse than Sonia’s lackeys.

Emergency protests.
Campus protests.
Anti-corruption protests.
They all end up being political recruitment camps.

Lalu-Rabri created the Jungle Raj of 1990-2005.
They loved him then, so why will they condemn Nitish-Lalu’s Jungle Raj 2?
‪#‎JungleRaj2‬

2015: Choose AAP, Save Delhi.
2020: By the time AAP is finished choosing its nonsense strategies, Delhi will be in need of saving.
2017: Choose AAP, Save Goa…

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Yet more RCB IPL musings…

Ashes to ashes and dust to dust.
If Gayle don’t get you, Kohli must.
If Kohli should fall, ABD will make you go bust.
#Qualifier1

Gayle gaya. Kohli gaya. Watson gaya. Rahul gaya. Binny gaya. Baby gaya.
ABD: Picture abhi baaki hai mere dost!
#Qualifier1

Sau sonaar ki, ek lohaar ki.
‪#‎IPL‬ ‪#‎RCB‬…
Teen sau sonaar ki, teen lohaar ki.
‪#‎Gayle‬ ‪#‎Kohli‬ ‪#‎ABD‬

Bengaluru boy/girl: Say the 3 magic words!
‪#‎RCB‬ fan: Say the 3 magic letters…
A B D !

Other players…
Gotta try to keep asking rate below 10 runs an over.
ABD…
I am in control till asking rate is upto 16 runs an over.

ABD and RCB bowlers finally telling Kohli…
Tu kucch jyaada hi batting kar liya boss!
Ab thoda araam karle!
#Qualifier1

How do we stop Gayle?
Gayle out of form. So now how do we stop ABD?
Before you sort out ABD, Kohli goes berserk.
And then Gayle comes back in form!

There should be a Yellow Cap or something for the fielder with the most wickets.

Changing times…
VVS Laxman in his 220 international matches career hit 10 6s.
Brendon McCullum in the very first ‪#‎IPL‬ innings hit 13 6s.

Kohli.
Century: Yawn!
Fifty: Underperformed.
Zero: Aaj sooraj kahan se nikla!

Hurricane Kohli.
Gayle Storm.
ABD Cyclone.

Sir, right now Kohli can emerge victorious from any hopeless situation!
Mallya: Then should we make him in-charge of UB?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Modi to Trump—Spectacular rise of the global Right

Can you feel the global Right resurgence? Actually you probably can’t because the global intellectual and media space still leans firmly Left and it is being severely downplayed. However the 2010s have already proved to be momentous for the Right and we could be witnessing the beginning of a brand new era.

Communism was unleashed on the world in 1848 by Karl Marx and since then it was seen as the utopia to end all ills. When the largest country (Russia) and the most populous (China) switched to Marx’s manifesto, many predicted a Communist globe.

That’s a pipe dream now. However despite the utter collapse of Communism in 1991, the ruling powerful global Left lobby marched on well into the 2000s. In the 2010s, the Left’s hold on the world is fast collapsing like a pack of cards.

You could say that the first domino was our very own Prime Minister Narendra Modi. If first Prime Minister Jawaharlal Nehru was a pseudo-Communist then his current successor Congress President Sonia Gandhi could be called a pseudo-Communist on steroids.

Schemes like NREGA and bills like the one on food security were supposed to get her a third term or at least give Modi a fractured mandate to exploit. However the Right thrashed the Left a whopping 282-44 in the May 2014 Lok Sabha polls. Absolutely nobody saw that coming.

Modi first occupied the Far Right space and then moved Centre-Right. If he wins against in 2019, then he may move back to Far Right. Who knows? So far the BJP has won most of the Assembly elections after 2014 and the Leftist Congress party is fast shrinking.

Many consider Benjamin Netanyahu the most Right-leaning Israeli Prime Minister ever and he was supposed to lose in the March 2015 polls. In a shocker he actually won and is gaining strength to this present day.

England has been one of the biggest opponents of Communist Russia in the past as their MI5 successes have shown. However their intellectuals and media have absolutely no problem leaning Left.

We saw a Battle Royale between the honourable Right David Cameron and Left Ed Miliband. All the analysis saw Cameron either being slightly ahead or a hung House with everyone flocking towards Miliband to form a government.

In another shocker Cameron won 330-232 in the House of Commons. Even Labour bastions were breached. That sent shockwaves in the English intellectual space and has pushed Miliband into oblivion. Labour has picked up the far Left Jeremy Corbyn who will struggle to get the common voter aboard with his extremist views. In fact Corbyn couldn’t nail Cameron on the Panama Papers scam and people have forgotten it now.

Now it is the turn of America. If you listen regularly to billionaire Donald Trump, then you’ll think “Far Right”. That’s why nobody gave him a chance and he was seen as a maverick who would go nowhere in the US presidential race.

Trump kept doing well and America’s ruling Left-leaning commentators kept dismissing him. When Trump made the infamous statement about keeping Muslims out of American the Left establishment started jumping in delight and attacked him virulently in a hope of landing the knockout punch.

It is a testimony of the declining influence of the Left that Trump’s popularity ratings, far from being severely dented, actually went up. Then one major media house actually did a bizarre story that Trump’s backers weren’t real voters.

Now he has clinched the Republican ticket and it is his rival Hillary Clinton (of the Leftist Democratic Party) who is looking quite jaded. It remains to be seen whether Trump can produce a shocker like Modi, Netanyahu and Cameron in the final polls.

Then there’s Europe. All the Right-wing parties have been simmering for decades and they have finally stumbled upon a tinder—Migrants. As instances of crime and terrorist attacks increase, the Right gets stronger.

Peculiarly, the global Left hates the Christian Right, Jewish Right and Hindu Right. But they seem to have entered into an unofficial alliance with the Muslim Right.

That’s why you’ll find the global Left attacking the likes of Trump, Netanyahu and Modi regularly, but going soft on Muslim fundamentalists. However the situation in Europe is changing and the Left is being marginalized.

In Germany Pegida (Patriotic Europeans Against the Islamisation of the Occident) is becoming more powerful and the government is bringing in legislation to deport immigrants easily, something which the Left is against.

The Right-wing National Front of France made impressive gains in the municipal elections elections held some time back. Ran a Reuters headline…

Far-right National Front stuns French elite with EU ‘earthquake’.

Denmark made an asset seizure law that enables the government to seize cash and valuables of migrants to fund government schemes for them. The Leftist intellectuals are up in arms, but they are finding their influence greatly reduced.

The Right-wing Law and Justice party in Poland has captured power and in almost every European country the Right is rising steadily.

The latest news comes from the Austrian elections. We almost had the first Far Right head of State in Europe. Norbert Hofer of the Far Right Freedom Party won the first round of Presidential elections and lost by a whisker in the final round. But too many people voted for Hofer to brush it under the carpet. The Right will only get stronger.

So what are the reasons for this? For one the Left should have collapsed in 1991. But it’s not that easy. The Left occupied powerful positions in government and academia and instead of seeing the writing on the wall, they fought tooth and nail for the Leftist establishment to survive.

However those who grew up in the 1990s onwards and entered various institutions saw no appeal in Communism and the Left. They are slowly occupying positions of power now. Secondly, is the rise of the social media.

While the Left could still maintain a stranglehold over traditional media—That is not the case with social media where every idea and every ideology has equal chance to succeed. In fact social media hates any form of control and the Left’s efforts to control it have backfired spectacularly.

Finally, it is the world leaders themselves. Modi is dismantling the Leftist establishment in India and getting virulently attacked for it. Cameron was targeted by the Left and will feel no love for them. The Left have virtually given up in Israel on Netanyahu.

But the rise of the European Right will be key in the years to come.

We are entering a new era and it will be quite interesting to see how things pan out.

(This is an updated version of something that came in January 2016)

Also read…

Why Trump Haters Could Well End Up Making Him President

8 things you should know about India’s Left

Yes, it’s Left wing extremism!

AAP and the Communist Revolution of 2014!

 

Pappu banayega #CongressMuktBharat…

In 1915, Mahatma “the first” Gandhi came to India and freed us from the Angrez.
A 100 years later Rahul “the last” Gandhi will free us from the Congrez.

Pappu and Modi are actually brothers in arms doing a joint operation called ‪#‎CongressMuktBharat‬
One from the inside and the other from the outside.

If Congress will win in 2019, India will be renamed Pappu Pradesh and the capital will be Vadra Nagar.

If the Congress had ruled continuously from 1947-2016, India would have been renamed Nehrudesh, the capital Indirabad and the moon would have been called Rajivchand.

You can go from Kasturba Gandhi Marg near Rajiv Chowk (within Indira Chowk) to Indira Gandhi Airport cutting the Mahatma Gandhi Ring Road for a flight to Rajiv Gandhi Airport and onto another Mahatma Gandhi Road there.
There are thousands of such route possibilities in India.

Online, Twitter wit finished off the Congress.
Offline, a bunch of Twits finished off the Congress.

In 2013 they declared Pappu as the future of Congress and proceeded to lose Rajasthan, Delhi, Maharashtra, Andhra Pradesh, Haryana, Telangana, Kerala, Assam (and of course Lok Sabha polls) since then!

IND(ira & son)IA

Congress Lok Sabha seats…
Nehru: 364, 371, 361.
Indira: 283, 352, 189, 374.
Sympathy waves: 404, 244.
Rajiv: 197.
Rao: 140.
Kesri: 144.
Sonia: 114, 145.
MMS: 206.
Pappu: 44.
In 2019 they can have Priyanka lead to ensure at least 20 seats.

#‎CongressMuktBharat‬ was actually launched by DMK’s CN Annadurai in Tamil Nadu in 1967.
They kicked out the Congress permanently that year.

Congress was the king of MLAs-MLCs from 1947 (with a brief blip in 1977) till Modi fully hit them.
Now BJP leads Congress 1147 to 972.

Time to rename ‪#‎GrandOldParty‬ as the ‪#‎PappuParty‬.
‪#‎CongressSinking‬ ‪#‎DynastyDaysEnd‬

Nehru ek. Gandhi anek.
Things named after Nehru-Gandhi anek X 1000.

#‎SoniaPappuBail‬
‪#‎IshratRevelations‬
‪#‎AgustaScam‬
‪#‎PCinSoup‬
‪#‎25terroristsFreedDisclosure‬
‪#‎2002AccusedNabbed‬
Paasa palating and how!

If the Congress comes back to power in 2019, it’ll be with a vengeance.
Forget Gandhi-Nehru, they may even start naming things after Vadra.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru