Yet more musings on the #NehruGandhiDynasty…

When media wants to make her a private citizen, it’s Priyanka Vadra.
When media wants to make her a politician, it’s Priyanka Gandhi.
‪#‎Pappini‬

#‎DynastyCliches‬
Priyanka is coming.
Sonia is unhappy.
Pappu is relaunching.
Rajiv invented a, b, c… x, y, z.
Vadra is a private citizen.

Priyanka bas aa rahi hai politics main.
Sab ki chutti kar degi. Indira jaisi hai.
“Coming soon” since 1998. Yawn!
‪#‎Pappini‬

The roles of Pappu and Pappini keep getting larger and larger with each passing year and yet they are still so teeny weeny.
‪#‎CongressSinking‬

Great progress…
1947: Nehru Dynasty.
1966: Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty.
2019: Nehru-Gandhi-Vadra Dynasty?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Even more Nehru-Dynasty musings…

Sonia Raj.
Minuscule successes Sonia’s doing.
Colossal failures India’s fault.
Modi Raj.
Minuscule failures Modi’s fault.
Colossal successes India’s doing.

An inexperienced dynast failed. What to do?
‪#‎Pappu‬
Idea! Get an even more inexperienced dynast!
‪#‎PappiniPriyanka‬

Modi: ‪#‎CongressMuktBharat‬
Congress/Communists/Liberals: ‪#‎ModiMuktBharat‬
Swamy: ‪#‎JaitleyMuktBJP‬
Jaitley: ‪#‎SwamyMuktBJP‬
Pappu: In sab se mukti!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Congress crisis musings…

If you support Kejri, you are an honest sincere human being.
If you support Pappu you are neutral.
But if you support Modi you are communal, Fascist and irrational.

Congress workers renamed a toilet after Rishi Kapoor under the following scheme…
Rajiv Gandhi Shauchalya Ka Naam Badlo Yojana.

Modi approval ratings 2014-19…
Aam junta: 2/3rds approve.
‪#‎AdarshLiberals‬: 2/300ths approve.

The Congress Priyanka ‪#‎2019Polls‬ dilemma…
Get her in too soon and she gets exposed.
Get her late and voters already decided to give Modi second term.

A severe Congress reshuffle would mean…
Senior President: Sonia.
Senior Vice President: Rahul.
Junior Vice President: Priyanka.
Mascot: Vadra.

In 2009 they told us Sonia best bet for India.
In 2014 they told us Mera Pappu Mahaan.
In 2019 they’ll say Priyanka greatest ever.

Congress then…
How can Amitabh share the stage with a person like Modi!
Now…
How can Modi share the stage with a person like Amitabh!

I am ready to die for Sonia.
I pledge allegiance to Sonia.
Madamji at your feet.
Arundhati isn’t an independent and mobile republic, Sonia is!

Madhavrao Scindia-Rajesh Pilot left us.
Pranabda is Prez.
No really strong Chief Minister.
Let’s face it. Pappu’s still the best bet.

1885-1920: Indian National Congress
1920-48: Congress (Mahatma)
1948-66: Congress (Nehru)
1966-2014: Congress (Indira)
2014-__: Congress (Pappu)

Dare to think beyond Dynasty?
Sonia should retire. Who should take over?
Pappu!
But Pappu has failed.
Priyanka?
Kucch naya socho!
Vadra?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Pappu banayega #CongressMuktBharat…

In 1915, Mahatma “the first” Gandhi came to India and freed us from the Angrez.
A 100 years later Rahul “the last” Gandhi will free us from the Congrez.

Pappu and Modi are actually brothers in arms doing a joint operation called ‪#‎CongressMuktBharat‬
One from the inside and the other from the outside.

If Congress will win in 2019, India will be renamed Pappu Pradesh and the capital will be Vadra Nagar.

If the Congress had ruled continuously from 1947-2016, India would have been renamed Nehrudesh, the capital Indirabad and the moon would have been called Rajivchand.

You can go from Kasturba Gandhi Marg near Rajiv Chowk (within Indira Chowk) to Indira Gandhi Airport cutting the Mahatma Gandhi Ring Road for a flight to Rajiv Gandhi Airport and onto another Mahatma Gandhi Road there.
There are thousands of such route possibilities in India.

Online, Twitter wit finished off the Congress.
Offline, a bunch of Twits finished off the Congress.

In 2013 they declared Pappu as the future of Congress and proceeded to lose Rajasthan, Delhi, Maharashtra, Andhra Pradesh, Haryana, Telangana, Kerala, Assam (and of course Lok Sabha polls) since then!

IND(ira & son)IA

Congress Lok Sabha seats…
Nehru: 364, 371, 361.
Indira: 283, 352, 189, 374.
Sympathy waves: 404, 244.
Rajiv: 197.
Rao: 140.
Kesri: 144.
Sonia: 114, 145.
MMS: 206.
Pappu: 44.
In 2019 they can have Priyanka lead to ensure at least 20 seats.

#‎CongressMuktBharat‬ was actually launched by DMK’s CN Annadurai in Tamil Nadu in 1967.
They kicked out the Congress permanently that year.

Congress was the king of MLAs-MLCs from 1947 (with a brief blip in 1977) till Modi fully hit them.
Now BJP leads Congress 1147 to 972.

Time to rename ‪#‎GrandOldParty‬ as the ‪#‎PappuParty‬.
‪#‎CongressSinking‬ ‪#‎DynastyDaysEnd‬

Nehru ek. Gandhi anek.
Things named after Nehru-Gandhi anek X 1000.

#‎SoniaPappuBail‬
‪#‎IshratRevelations‬
‪#‎AgustaScam‬
‪#‎PCinSoup‬
‪#‎25terroristsFreedDisclosure‬
‪#‎2002AccusedNabbed‬
Paasa palating and how!

If the Congress comes back to power in 2019, it’ll be with a vengeance.
Forget Gandhi-Nehru, they may even start naming things after Vadra.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The Congress continues to sink musings…

Prominent preservation agitations…
1. Save the Tiger.
2. Save the Ganga.
3. Save the Congress.

I don’t feel sorry for Manmohan Singh.
He signed all the documents.
And for 10 years.
Tomorrow a policeman may allow crime to happen and claim innocence by same logic.

If it’s going to take to the streets for every problem it has, then Congress might as well set up camp on the streets of India 24X7 till 2019.

Motilal became Congress President in 1919 and formally founded the Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty.
Pappu will become Congress President by 2019 and formally end the Dynasty.

Manmohan: Congress is India’s soul.
Truth: Congress is India’s sole.
Puri tarah se ghis gaya hai. Replacement ki zaroorat hai.

You can’t make this stuff up…
The virtual dictator of the most corrupt party in India is doing a march to save democracy and there’s a poster with Vadra!

While addressing Lok Sabha…
I’d like to address this August House.
While addressing Congress strategy meet…
I’d like to address this Agusta House.

2014: Prevent Modi from coming to power.
2015: Prevent Modi’s achievements from being showcased.
2016: Prevent Supreme Leader from going to jail.
‪#‎Congress‬ ‪#‎Agusta‬ ‪#‎NH‬

Nehru ½ of Mahatma
Indira ⅓ of Nehru
Rajiv ¼ of Indira
Sonia ⅕ of Rajiv
Pappu ⅙ of Sonia
Priyanka 1/7 of Pappu
Vadra ⅛ of Priyanka
Vadra4PM!

Just get Sibal to give a press conference and declare…
Zero loss in all scams!
End of story.
‪#‎AgustaWestland‬

One poster had the Nehru Gandhi Vadra Dynasty.
Is it a march for democracy or march for monarchy?

Right now the party is debating who should be the losing Congress UP Chief Ministerial candidate in 2017.

For Congress leaders…
India = Congress = Dynasty.
So they feel that what they are doing is totally right.

We have a right to rule.
We have a right to be corrupt.
You don’t even have a right to question us.
‪#‎Congress‬

Sonia-Pappu arrested temporarily so then can get a feel to see what it will feel like when it becomes permanent.

What is your strategy?
Congress: Ulta chor kotwaal ko daate 24X7 365 days a year.

Years as MP before being offered PM’s post…
Nehru: 0.
Indira: 2.
Rajiv: 3.
Sonia: 0.
Pappu most qualified.
He has been MP for 12 years already.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty: The law of diminishing returns…

Nehru was less than 50% of Patel/Netaji.

Indira was less than 50% of Nehru.

Rajiv was less than 50% of Indira.

Sonia is less than 50% of Rajiv.

Pappu is less than 50% of Sonia.

Pappini will be less than 50% of Pappu.

Still the slogan will be…
Pappini laao, desh bachao,
Aur uske baad uske baccho ko bhi lao.

© Sunil Rajguru

Alternative careers for sinking Congress leaders…

Rahul Gandhi: Fashion model.

Priyanka Vadra: Brand Ambassador to the real estate industry.

Sonia Gandhi: Permanent Ambassador to Italy.

Digvijay Singh: Conspiracy theory TV host.

Shashi Tharoor: Sonia’s official biographer.

Natwar Singh: Regular author, challenger to Chetan Bhagat.

Sushil Kumar Shinde: Successor to Ahmed Patel.

Kapil Sibal: Back to Full-time lawyer defending umpteen Congress scams.

Manish Tewari: Anchor of TV channel Congress Now challenging Arnab.

Abhishek Manu Singhvi: TV reality show participant.

Mani Shankar Aiyar: Rajiv Gandhi’s official biographer, series of many books.

Jairam Ramesh: Pappu’s official biographer.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru