India Australia 4-0 musings…

· New home series slogan…
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust,
if Ashwin don’t get ya, Jaddu Beta must.

· Kuch paane ke liye (4-0) kuch khona padta hai (0-4).
Cricket ke maidan pe haarke jeetne waale ko Dhoni kahate hai.

· Like a Phoenix, India has risen (4-0) from the ashes (0-4) of the last Australia defeat.

· Vijay, Dhawan, Pujara…
Jo Opener Wohi Sikander.

· Dhoni is probably in the Guinness Book of World Records for hitting the winning shot in maximum number of cricket matches.

· His new nickname is: Aaya God Gaya God.

· Na ghar ka na ghaat ka… na Rajya Sabha attend karta hai aur na Test century banata hai.

· Sidhu doing Hindi commentary with VVS is like Sehwag batting with Ojha.

· When Sehwag came, he was seen as a Sachin clone.
Now every Indian batsman seems like a Sehwag clone.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

My complete Open Letters…

Open letter to Justice Katju
Is the Press Council chief neutral?
24 March, 2013,

Open letter to Rahul Gandhi
Or how his Chintan Shivir speech was a dud
25 January, 2013,

A note to the dented and painted Indian woman
If our politicians wrote an open letter…
27 December, 2012,

Theek Nahi Hai!: Open letter to Manmohan Singh
The PM gave a bland and insipid speech
24 December, 2012,

Open Letter to Anna Hazare…
Anna’s talent and charisma can come in handy in…

16 January 2012,

Open letter to the ICC regarding the Sehwag menace
From the Royal Society of Prevention of Cruelty to Bowlers
09 December, 2011,

An Open Letter to Kapil Sibal
The IT Minister should understand the Net better
07 December, 2011,

An Open Letter to Shahrukh Khan
Despite Ra.One’s mediocrity…
8 November, 2011,

An Open Letter to the Congress Party…
…regarding the whole Anna Hazare issue…
16 August, 2011,

Modi-Rahul PM musings…

· Modi is like a hare.
Rahul is like a tortoise.
And we know who wins that race.

· While Modi has mastered the online medium, I wonder if Rahul Baba can even spell “Internet”.

· Modi’s PM candidature: Is the glass half full or half empty?
Rahul’s candidature: The glass is empty.
(Positive spin: It is full of air.)

· Ho sakta hai Modi even 50% phekta hoga apne speeches main.
But other politicians talk 100% nonsense.
50% > 0%.

· In software, subsequent versions get better.
In the Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty, subsequent versions steadily get worse.

· Nitish is petrified that under Modi it will become a National Dictatorial Alliance.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

UPA misrule musings…

· Italian absconders. Lankan Tamils. Pakistani infiltrators. Chinese hackers. Bangladeshi immigrants. Swiss banks. American business…
The sum of India’s foreign policy right now.

· TMC, DMK pull the plug.
Don’t worry.
SP-BSP battery hai na!

· SP-BSP vs Congress.
Masters in UP.
Servants at the Centre.

· Even a Lame Duck looks dynamic compared to the current UPA government, which is totally crippled.

· If there was such a thing as a lame duck Opposition, then the BJP is it.

· US had 9/11, where the Twin Towers were destroyed.
India had 2011, where the Twin Towers of Governance and Stability were destroyed.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Aussie Mohali 3-0 musings…

· Dhawan: I replaced Sehwag.
Vijay: I displaced Gambhir.
Pujara: I’m the New Wall.
Kohli: I filled Dada’s void.
Dhoni: I’m in Laxman’s position.
Rahane (Looking at Sachin): Sigh! Mera number kab aayega?

· Mickey Arthur: What’s my homework?
Cricket Australia: Go home and get some other work. We need a new coach.

· Sound of Music: I am 16, going on 17…
Sound of Cricketing Music: We are 3-0, going on 4-0…

· And in other news, the ODI World Champions win their (almost) T20 match at Mohali.

· The Last Minute should be renamed as The Dhoni Minute.

· At this rate, all the Aussie bowlers will now refuse to do their homework in the hope of getting out of the Fourth Test.

· 1984: Mooche ho toh Nathulal jaisi ho warna naa ho.
2013: Mooche ho toh Shikhar Dhawan jaisi ho warna naa ho.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru