The Sachin Mahashatak is finally here!

∙ Now he can officially change his name to Sauchin RunIshwar TenXTendulkar a.k.a Shatakeshwar.

∙ In Roman Numerals, C stands for Century, So Sachin’s new name is…
SaCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCChin

∙ New Sachinisque blessing for entry-level batsman: Aap khelo pachees saal aur maaro sau shatak.

∙ It took Sachin about 370 days to run this single and go from the 99th to the 100th 100!

∙ Now Sachin’s wife is really “Sau”bhagyawati.

Sau-te sau-te sau-te finally Mahashatak jaag gaya!

Subah ka bhoola hua shatak agar shyam ko laut aaye, to use shatak nahin mahashatak kahate hai!

∙ He almost changed his name to 99dulkar and retired!

∙ He was on 99 for so long that it almost felt like 99 years… you could have almost called him Searching Tendulkar…

∙ Sachin scored his 99th international Century on March 12.
Sachin scored his 100th international Century on March 16.
(Kindly to please ignore the year in between!)

© Sunil Rajguru

Cosolidated Mahashatak postings down the ages…

On the anniversary of Sachin Tendulkar’s 99th Century and his wait for the 100th international hundred, also called the Mahashatak, my complete blogs on the issue…

The Sachin Tendulkar “99To100 Era”…

Mission 100th 100 Scorecard for die-hard Sachin Tendulkar fans

Aayega Aayega Aanewala Shatak Aayega

Woh maarega Mahashatak ek din…

Sachin Mahashatak in Hollywood titles

4 reasons why Sachin has still not scored his Mahashatak…

Sachin Mahashatak musings…

Some Sachin Mahashatak musings…

Sachin more Mahashatak musings…

Consolidated Mahashatak musings down the ages…

Consolidated Mahashatak musings down the ages…

∙ C… Speed of light… Cosmic speed limit… Nothing can cross it… not even light…
100C… Cricketing speed limit… Nothing can touch it… not even God…

∙ Mahashatak to Sachin… Tu jahaa jahaa chalegaa, mera saayaa saath hogaa…

∙ ABCD of Sachin’s Mahashatak misses…
Sachin has missed his 100th 100 at Ahmedabad, Birmingham, Chennai and Delhi…
(Now let’s hope he doesn’t go all the way from E to Z!)

∙ Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Mahashatak.
Mahashatak who?
My shatak when, where and how???

∙ Happy First Anniversary to Sachin’s 99th International 100.
Will you have many more?

∙ Sachin will probably retire on an innings of 99 not out and then retire from international cricket to prove a point.
(Even if that takes two years!)

∙ How will the great man’s career end?
Sachin: 100*.
Sachin: 99, Retired Hurt.

∙  Jab tak sooraj chand rahaega,
Mahashatak tu aata aata… aata hi rahega…

∙ The Mahashatak solution…
Include First Class centuries as part of the equation.
Voila! He scored his Mahashatak ages ago!
Next step, include his school and other unofficial centuries.
Aila! He has scored 200 centuries.
Then the question will automatically become…
When will he score his 300th century?

∙ Q: What’s common to R Ashwin, Tino Mawoyo and Kirk Edwards?
A: None of them even debuted in Tests when Sachin scored his 99th century and all of them scored a Test 100 before Sachin’s 100th.

∙ Sachin Mahashatak Obscure Fact #23…
Even the Capital of Delhi has hit a 100 before him…

∙ Has anyone else noticed that the Aishwarya-Abhishek Bachchan child was probably conceived about a month before Sachin Tendulkar scored his 99th Century?
(Section: Amazing Facts about the Mahashatak)

∙ Sachin has been stranded on his 99th international century for ages now. But that’s normal. He always spends a lot of time in the nervous nineties.

∙ Old Saying: Delhi door hai.
New Saying…
Sachin ka sauwa shatak door hai.

∙ Whenever the Little Master nears a landmark, we have a string of nervous failures.
After the Landmark, we have a flurry of confident centuries.
How many Landmarks does a man need, before he looks at just the team scoreboard?

∙ Tendulkar Mahashatak Trivia No. 23: The bowlers purposely leaked runs to ensure that Sachin would get a large enough target to score his 100th international hundred.

∙ Tan-ta-na! Tondulkar gaya Tel lene, Tonting bhi aa gaya.
Looks like Hell will Freeze over before the Mahashatak.

© Sunil Rajguru

Woh maarega Mahashatak ek din…

Sachin Tendulkar will definitely score his 100th international 100 one day…

Please sing to the tune of Hum honge kamyab

Woh maarega Mahashatak,
Woh maarega Mahashatak,
Woh maarega Mahashatak ek din,
Ho ho ho mann main hai Vishwas,
Poora hai vishwas,
Woh maarega Mahashatak ek din.

Chup baithenge critics charo aur,
Chup baithenge critics charo aur,
Chup baithenge critics charo aur ek din,
Ho ho ho mann main hai Vishwas,
Poora hai vishwas,
Chup baithenge critics charo aur ek din.

Woh retire karega Mahashatak ke saath,
Mahashatak aur Sachin honge haathon main haath
Woh retire karega Mahashatak ke saath ek din,
Ho ho ho mann main hai vishwas,
Poora hai vishwas,
Woh retire karega Mahashatak ke saath ek din.

Nahi darr kisi nervous 90s ka aaj,
Nahi bhay kisi nervous 90s ka aaj,
Nahi darr kisi nervous 90s ka aaj ke din,
Ho ho ho mann main hai vishwas,
Poora hai vishwas,
Nahi darr kisi nervous 90s ka aaj ke din.

This Spoof by Sunil Rajguru

Mission 100th 100 Scorecard for die-hard Sachin Tendulkar fans (Updated again!)

Statistics since Sachin Tendulkar’s last international century on March 12, 2011…

Days elapsed: 349
Matches Played (Tests + ODIs): 20
Innings: 30
Average: 34.2
Mode of Dismissals: Caught (18), LBW (7), Bowled (4), Run Out (1)
Highest Score: 94
Lowest Score: 1
Runs Scored: 1026
Half-Centuries: 8
Latest Villain Bowler: KMDN Kulasekara
Most Dismissals: Peter Siddle (3)
International centuries scored by all other players during this period: 100+

(These statistics updated as on February 24, 2012)

This scorecard by Sunil Rajguru

The Sachin Tendulkar “99To100 Era”… (Updated)

So much time is passing between Sachin’s 99th and 100th international century, that we can now officially call it the “99To100 Era”.

Let’s take a look at the earth-shattering events have already taken place in this Era so far…

India wins ODI World Cup after 28 years… Osama finally captured and killed… Gaddafi toppled and killed after 42 years… Left rule ends in West Bengal after 34 years… Anna Hazare August Kranti… Lokpal Bill fails in Rajya Sabha… Djokovic becomes No. 1 to end Federer-Nadal Era … F1 comes to India… Amitabh becomes grandfather… Will-Kat wedding… Indian bowler (Ashwin) takes fiver and scores century in Test after 40 years… Ponting gets Test century after 2 years… Iraq war finally ends… Mars mission launched…

The following people passed away…

Sathya Sai Baba, Steve Jobs, MAK Pataudi, Jagjit Singh, Bhupen Hazarika, Shammi Kapoor, Joe Frazier, MF Hussain, Elizabeth Taylor, Amy Winehouse, Suresh Tendulkar, Kim Jong-il, Dev Anand, Socrates, Václav Havel, Christopher Hitchens, Mario Miranda, Sultan Khan, Gary Speed…

(And to think he was on 85 after surviving about half a dozen dropped catches and a UDRS reversal in the same month as his 99th century and there would have been no era.)

© Sunil Rajguru

General cricketing musings…

Overheard…
Beware of the Indian cricket fan… like a fan he has blades which can cut you to pieces…

∙ Theme song at Perth… WACA WACA ei o… this time for India…

∙ Sachin please score your Mahashatak fast so that we can declare this wretched series and go home…

∙ The whole team looks really tired… they are probably tired of waiting for the Mahashatak…

© Sunil Rajguru

Some more Mahashatak musings…

Mahashatak conspiracy theory #46…
Michael Clarke declared early so that there was enough time for Sachin to score his 100th 100 as there is forecast of rain.

Mahashatak Fact #67
After Sachin hit his 99th international century, more than 100 international centuries were scored in 2011.
In fact two Tests began on January 3, 2012 and yielded six centuries in three days.

Mahashatak meaningless jingle #22
Shatak bhatak gaya hai… Mahabhatak…
Shatak latak gaya hai… Mahalatak…
Shatak atak gaya hai… Maha-atak…

© Sunil Rajguru

News in Limericks 6

There was this fearless journalist in Iraq,
Who hurled a shoe at a US Presidential chap,
It inspired attacks on Jindal, Chiddu and Yeddy,
Then on Advani, Omar, Kalmadi and Dwivedi,
And now shoeing has morphed into one tight slap!

There were these people Waiting for the God,
To complete the most divinest cricketing plot,
Then it went amiss and came many a miss,
Heartbreakingly in the 90s a bowler did dismiss,
And now it looks like we’re Waiting for Godot!

There was this terrorist called Kasab,
Who in Indian jails had many a kebab,
The demands never stopped,
And endless days got docked,
Aur ab us par paise kharch karne ka na koi hisaab!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The Sachin Tendulkar “99To100 Era”…

So much time is passing between Sachin’s 99 and 100th international century, that we can now officially call it the “99To100 Era”.

Let’s take a look at the earth-shattering events have already taken place in this Era so far…

India wins World Cup after 28 years… Osama finally captured and killed… Gaddafi toppled and killed after 42 years… Left rule ends in West Bengal after 34 years… Anna Hazare Lokpal Revolution… Djokovic becomes No. 1 to end Federer-Nadal Era … F1 comes to India… Amitabh becomes grandfather… Will-Kat wedding… Indian bowler takes fiver and scores century in Test after 40 years… The following people pass away… Sathya Sai Baba, Steve Jobs, MAK Pataudi, Jagjit Singh, Bhupen Hazarika, Shammi Kapoor, Joe Frazier, MF Hussain, Elizabeth Taylor, Amy Winehouse, Suresh Tendulkar…

Sachin Mahashatak Misses #16 & #17
Fact of the day: There have been close to 75 international centuries after Sachin Tendulkar scored his 99th international century.
Thought of the day: Will Sachin at least hit the world’s 100th international century after his own 99th?

Sidelight of India-West Indies Third Test at Wankhede Stadium:

The amazing consistency of R Ashwin…
Day 4: Hum match haar rahe hain!
Ashwin: Don’t worry main draw karata hu…
Day 5: Hum match jeet rahe hain!
Ashwin: Don’t worry main draw karata hu…

© Sunil Rajguru

Sachin Mahashatak in Hollywood titles

Damn99! … How Rampaul Stole the Mahashatak … The Day the Stadium Stood Still … Players of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Mahashatak … Close Encounters of the 99 Kind … Mission: Impossible 100 … Transformers: Turning 99 into 100 … The Lost World: Century Park … SRT and the Last Century Crusade … 99 is Not Enough … Catch the Mahashatak if You Can … Gone in 1 Ball … District 99… Mahashatak Wars: The Bowler Strikes Back … Dr. Shataklove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the 99th Century … Dial 100 for Nirvana …

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Some Sachin Mahashatak musings…

∙ There’s many a slip between the 99th and 100th century.

∙ Like the Y2K problem, this is the 0.1K problem.
No-one has ever scored 100 international centuries so the counter keeps going to 00 after 99!
Someone up there better fix that counter fast!

∙ Here’s one record that Tendulkar will absolutely hate.
He’s already scored a quarter-century of international 90s.

∙ The Darren Sammy Catch had much more sting than the Sharad Pawar Slap.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru