There’s no difference between old news and very old news…

My morning paper comes late.
So I don’t read today’s paper and save it for tomorrow early morning.
I’ve been doing it for months now and haven’t noticed any difference…

∙ It is said that the Yomiuri Shimbun of Japan has a circulation of 14 million, the highest in the world.
But doesn’t the Facebook News Feed have a readership of 800 million?

∙ The future of the newspaper will depend on the time spent by mankind to conclude it’s bowel movement early in the morning.

∙ Isn’t it time to change the name of Newspaper to Oldpaper?

∙ If a newspaper ever runs a campaign to increase Internet literacy, it is in effect running a campaign to kill itself in the long run.

∙ The Obituary of the Newspaper will one day come on the Internet.

© Sunil Rajguru

And the repartee was…

Obama to Asia: US is here to stay, there’s nothing you can do about it!
Asia to Obama: Damn! We thought that continental drift was still taking place and the US was drifting apart from us!

Kambli to India: The 1996 India-Sri Lanka semi-final World Cup match was fixed!
India to Kambli: Hoto pe aisi baat tu daba ke chala aaya pandrah saal ke liye!

Mallya to Investors: Less lucrative routes! Aviation fuel hikes! Economy!
Investors to Mallya: IPL! F1!

CBI to SC: DMK! NDA! CAG! RIL! DoT!
SC to CBI: INC! INC! INC! INC!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Facebook Nations: Relationship Status

America-Pakistan: It’s Complicated.
(Where US=Husband)

India-Pakistan: Divorced in 1947, still awaiting final settlement.

America-China:
It’s Complicated.
(Where US=Wife)

Russia-America: It’s so funny how we don’t talk any more.

Brazil-Argentina: Relationship? Depends whether it’s on the football field or off it!

Afghanistan-Pakistan:
Separated at birth, hyphenated in the 2000s.
(Af-Pak)

India-China:
Married. (To the concept of being the next Superpower)

Israel-Palestine: Separated at birth, united in conflict.

South Korea-North Korea:
Brothers. (In Arms)

England-France: Neighbours. (Thank God for the Channel!)

China-Taiwan-Tibet:
What relationship? We are One. (Or so says every schizophrenic)

© Sunil Rajguru