Every day is a sonday 9…

Precious spit…
One day he was speaking very excitedly and some of his spit fell on my hands.
When I said it was bad manners he pointed angrily at my hand and said, “The DNA of that spit is 50% yourself and 50% the woman you love, so why are you complaining?”

The loooong weekend…
“What will you do if you could time travel?”
“Hmm, I’d wear a shiny silvery suit, go back thousands of years and descend from a helicopter and declare: I am God. I created the world in one day and rested for six days.”
“What good would that do?”
“Why then, maybe the working week would last one day and we’d have a 6-day weekend!”

Civics classes…
He loves using big words and phrases. “Techincally” and “practically” are his favourites.
Sometimes if we tell him to do something he doesn’t like, he quips: I think that’s against my fundamental rights.
His classic was once when he was told to a lot of work and he said: I would call that “child labour” and since I’m below 14, it’s against the Constitution.
Now I never thought of those things when I studied Civics in school!

© Sunil Rajguru

Advani versus Modi…

· To his fans Modi is an idea whose time has come.
To his detractors he is a 4-letter word.
To his detractors, Advani was around when someone said, “In the beginning was the word”.
To his fans… errr… does he have any left?

· Advani is History.
Modi’s 2014 impact is a Mystery.

· In cricket analogy, Narendra Modi is the captain and LK Advani is now the 12th man who thinks he’s the non-playing captain.

· If everyone does an Advani, then Narayan Murthy will be Infosys chief till 2035, Sonia will complete 40 years as Congress President and Sachin will play 300 Tests.

· At times I think that Robert Vadra has a greater chance of being Prime Minister than Narendra Modi.

· Advani spin #23…
I am just a 25-year-old sathiya gaya hua aadmi!

· There will be 3 major waves in 2014: Anti-Congress, Pro-Modi and Anti-Modi.
The sum of these 3 waves will decide the next government.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

How the Indian voter has been voting for the last 20-odd years…

1991: Agar Rajiv zinda hota, to main katai use vote nahin karta, par ab bechara chala gaya hai to main usko mera vote doonga.

1996: Liberalization, woh kya hota hai? Main theek se samjha nahin.

1998: Yaar, main abhi tak poori tarah se confused hu. Ye liberalization kya hai?

1999: 13 days, 13 months… thak gaya hu vote kar kar ke. Le paanch saal.

2004: BJP, tujhe chance diya na! Ab kripiya thodi der ke liye shanti se baith jaaiye.

2009: Liberalization! Ha, ab main theek se samjha. Le mera vote.

2014: Modi ya Rahul? Abbe mujhe kya ghonchu samjah rakha hai kya? Le… main “none of the above” click karta hu.

© Sunil Rajguru