Monthly Archives: July 2013

Yet more Diggy Raja musings…

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· Diggy Raja quotes fuel Twitter/FB jokes, humour sites, spoofs, parodies, cartoons and of course serious news in mainstream media.

· A day will come when Diggy Raja will finally say something that actually makes sense and the whole nation will go into shock.

· Online Trolls are absolutely pathetic.
But more pathetic are the Offline Trolls who call themselves Congress spokespersons.

· Roger Hollis: Biggest real-life double agent?
Professor Snape: Biggest in fiction?
Diggy Raja: Our biggest double agent?
(Ref: His bizarre statements weaken Congress, help BJP/RSS)

· My name is ______ and I’m an idiot.
The amount of Congress spokespersons who can put their name in the above sentence is not funny.

· #‎Bhonku‬ is a profound hashtag.
What about the voice’s “master”?
What about the people who feed it regularly?
Why do people love hearing it?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Ishrat Jahan musings…

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· CBI: Off to Ahmedabad on Ishrat case. Which song should I play on the way?
MMS: Dedicate it to Modi and play, “Tu Jahan Jahan chalega, mera saaya saath hoga…”

· After a blast in India, some condemn it, some condemn secularism, some condemn the Right, getting themselves condemned in the process… Then there’s the CBI condemning the IB…
Ghanta we all Indians are going to fight terrorism together like this.

· The interesting thing about the Modi debate is that with each setback or victory, both sides merely harden their stands.

· Gujarat Police (BJP) + IB (Congress) = Fake encounter!
Curiouser and curiouser.

· Congress hits sixer (Food Bill) over no ball (CBI-Ishrat).
Well played!
Food Bill = News. CBI chargesheet = Noise.
As usual, Noise trumps News.
NREGA saved UPA1. Food Bill may yet save UPA2!

· July 4 in US is their Independence Day.
July 4 in India will also be an Independence Day.
But for who?
Congress? BJP? CBI? IB?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Tahrir Square musings…

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· They should have annual elections in Egypt and all the ballot boxes should be placed in Tahrir Square.

· A Chief Justice taking charge of a country after a show of force?
Sounds a bit like Judge Dredd!

· Foreign springs lead to regime changes.
Indian springs lead to an immediate winter where the regime freezes all goodwill and tries to curb all freedoms.

· Protestor 1: How I love spring!
Protestor 2: But it’s always spring in Egypt!
Protestor 1: I know!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Wimbledon 2013 musings…

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· The film on Wimbledon 2013 could well be called…
The Fall of the Titans.

· Santa Maria! It’s their Swan Tsonga as greats say Roger and out to a not so Serene Wimbledon that has just hit the Nadir. All loser, no Victor(ia).

· The Number (20)13, lucky for some, but not for others.

· (At this rate)
Wimbledon 2013 finals…
Guard: Sorry sir, but we can’t let you in. No practice today. It’s a match day.
Players: But we’re the finalists!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

New Third Front formula…

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1. Head of party with most number of seats will become Prime Minister.
Second and Third parties will get a Deputy Prime Minister each.
Head of other parties will get plum posts: Home Minister, Defence Minister, Foreign Minister etc….

2. All regional parties that participate will get a special package for their respective states.

3. Railway Minister will only announce projects only for participating states. Same will apply to all other ministries and projects.

4. All heads of participating parties will form a Special Panel which the CBI will report to.

5. Special efforts will be made to clip the wings of the Congress and BJP. Let them get a taste of their own medicine!

6. The rest of India can go to hell, so States which don’t participate, beware!

7. In case all of the above fails, then the grand power sharing formula will be unveiled.
Every year will see one Prime Minister and two Deputy Prime Ministers.
This will be decided by a draw of lots and so for 5 years we can have 5 PMs and 10 Dy PMs, thereby fulfilling the ambitions of the Top 15 political parties in India apart from the Congress and BJP!

Bonus: If all the non-Congress and non-BJP parties have the required numbers then we could even impose a permanent Emergency!

Slogans…

United we rule, divided the Congress or BJP rules.

United we can divide this nation.

Ho raha hai Third Front Nirmaan.

Make Third Front your First Choice.

Third Front Shining.

Too many cooks spoil the broth, but can you actually do without cooks?

India is actually a Third Class country and therefore deserves the Third Front.

One’s lonely, two’s company and three’s not a crowd.

© Sunil Rajguru

Unending Modi musings…

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• Failed predictions…
1995: BJP will never come to power and complete a full term.
2003: Sonia is finished. NDA will get re-elected.
2008: Anti-incumbency will hit UPA.
Waiting…
2009: Congress will definitely win in 2014.
2013: Modi will never become PM.

∙ Whether you like it or not…
Coming soon in 2014: Modi 24X7, Modi Today, Aaj Modi, Modi Now, Modi India, The Times of Modi, Modi Express, The Modi Times, The Modi Express…

∙ Pre-1989: Entire mainstream media went after Congress and projected VP Singh as PM.
Pre-2014: Entire social media went after Congress and projected Narendra Modi as PM.
Times haven’t changed.
The media has.

∙ Blessed are those who are not part of this Anti-Modi vs Pro-Modi debate and are watching with amusement from the sidelines.
P.S. As for me, I can’t fathom when and why I got dragged into this black hole of a ping pong match.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru