Monthly Archives: June 2013

The Modi-Advani show…

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· If Modi loses badly in 2014, then Advani will make a comeback and position himself for 2019.

· BJP: The old order (Advani) changeth to yield place to the new (Modi).
Congress: The old order (Gandhi) changeth to yield place to the new (Gandhi).
(Where Gandhi=Mahatma/Indira/Rajiv/Sonia/Rahul…)

· LK Advani has had 6 Rath Yatras from 1990-2011.
Time for No. 7, NaMo Yatra?
(Where NaMo = Na (to) Modi)

· Only Indian TV news channels can convert a “Modi crowned King, gets Advani out of the way” to “Setback for Modi as Advani quits”.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Yet more Modi Advani Goa musings…

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· Modi does his first miracle after coming to “power” in the BJP.
He gets Advani to retire!

· Advani’s PM dreams are Goa-ing, Goa-ing, gone…

· Godwin’s law: Given enough time, in any online discussion—regardless of topic or scope—someone inevitably makes a comparison to Hitler or the Nazis.
Godwin’s India law: While discussing Modi, a comparison to Hitler or the Nazis will be made in no time at all.

· Jo bhi Goa jaata hai, mast ho kar laut-ta hai.
Ab Modi bhai sahab ko dekh leejiye na!
Only losers miss a chance to go to Goa.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Advani’s Sound of Music for Modi…

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Please sing to the tune of Sixteen Going on Seventeen from The Sound of Music…

(Advani sings to Modi…)

You wait little boy,
On an empty stage,
For fate to turn the light on,
Your life little boy,
Is an empty PM’s chair,
That politicians will want to trample on,
You are 62 going on 63,
Baby it’s time to think,
Better beware,
Be canny and careful,
Baby you’re on the brink,
You are 62 going on 63,
Fellows will fall in line,
Eager young Tweeple,
And TV hosts and analysts,
Will offer you PM dreams,
Totally unprepared are you,
To face the world of Delhi,
Timid and shy and scared are you,
Of things beyond your ken,
You need someone,
Older and wiser,
Telling you what to do,
I am 85 going on 86,
I’ll take care of the PM’s chair…

This Spoof by Sunil Rajguru

(Original Song: Sixteen Going on Seventeen.
Film: The Sound of Music.
Year: 1959.)

More Modi Advani Goa musings…

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· Modi ke liye Dilli door hai.
Advani ke liye Goa door hai.
Rahul ke liye India hi door hai.

· Congress thinks Rahul is the cure for Namonia.
They don’t realize that their cure is worse than their disease.

· 2004: Vajpayee lost.
2009: Advani lost.
2014: BJP itself is trying to make Modi lose.

· Vajpayee was the original hardliner.
He was moderate in front of Advani.
Advani is moderate in front of Modi.
Hard. Harder. Hardest.

· Political ages…
Sweet Sixties: Chidu (67), Sonia (66), Modi (62).
Super Seventies: Pranabda (77), Swamy (73), Pawar (72).
Energetic Eighties: Karunanidhi (89), Advani (85), Manmohan (80).

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Modi Advani Goa musings…

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· Dear Congress,
Now that you have declared it a Namonitis virus, know that it strikes the old in the BJP and everyone in the Congress, Media and Civil Society.
That’s a win-win situation for the BJP.

· Advani boycotting Goa…
This is like the Principal reporting in sick in fear of the School Captain.

· Whether he’s too old for politics is moot, but Advani is definitely too old to enjoy Goa.

· Ek Modi anaar sau bimaar.

· Indian Politics…
Age of consent: 30.
Adulthood: 40. (Rahul)
Get really noticed: 60. (Modi)
Second round of jawani: 80. (Advani, Manmohan)
Retirement: 100.

· The amount of promotions Rahul and Modi have received is not funny…
…and they are still so far from the PM’s chair.

· Advani to abhi bachcha hai jee.
Karunanidhi is older than Advani.
Older still is Lee Kuan Yew who held an official ministerial post for 50+ straight years from the age of 35 to 87.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Let a hundred flowers bloom…

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Let a hundred flowers bloom: Mao.

Let a hundred scams bloom: Congress.

Let a hundred revolutions be in the chatroom: Social networking.

Let a hundred terrorists go boom: Pakistan.

Let a hundred crores be given in the pressroom: Paid News.

Let a hundred shady deals be done quietly in the boardroom: Corporate India.

Let a hundred students sit in a single classroom: Government schools.

Let a hundred bets be made in the dressing room: Match fixers.

Let a hundred allegations fall flat in the courtroom: Scam accused.

Let a hundred songs be sung in the bathroom: Bathroom singers.

Let a hundred hallucinations be seen from a single mushroom: Drug addicts.

Let a hundred people pee together in the restroom: Sulabh International.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru