Monthly Archives: November 2013

Sonia musings…

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Sonia: BJP is a party of poisonous people.
+ Sonia: Power is poison.
= What Sonia really said: BJP is a party of powerful people.

It’s absolutely rare in the world for a pathetic orator to be the leader of a political party.
#SoniaGandhi

In Congress, MP stands for Master of Poison.
#Power=Poison #Sonia #Pappu

Power corrupts (UPA1).
Absolute power corrupts absolutely (UPA2).
Beyond that is complete annihilation (UPA3).

All Congress spokespersons play a game call “Passing the Foot in the Mouth Parcel”.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

2014 in terms of Election Symbols for…

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BJP voter: Kamal corruption aur gande economy ke keechad main khilega.
Rival: Kamal murjha jaayega.

Congress voter: Haath high five karega.
Rival: Haath malte raha jaoge!

SP voter: Cycle Delhi main daudega.
Rival: Cycle UP main hi puncture ho jaayega.

JD(U) voter: Teer nishaane pe lagega is baar.
Rival: Toota teer?

BSP voter: Haathi Delhi main raaj karega.
Rival: Haathi UP main hi extinct ho jaayega.

CPM voter: Loha garam hai, maar do Hathoda.
Rival: Hathoda ka zamana kab ka khatam ho gaya.

AAP voter: Jhaadu saare parties ko saaf karega.
Rival: Jhaadu apne hi armaano pe jhaadu lagayega.

TRS voter: Telenagana ke naye raaste pe Car chalega.
Rival: Car main pahale petrol to bharwa lo!

NCP voter: Ghadi ka zamana hai.
Rival: Tumhari to Ghadi band ho gayi hai!

DMK voter: Sunrise and Sonrise!
Rival: Sunset and Sonset!

© Sunil Rajguru

Tehelka musings…

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Taliban justice…
Sexual harassment = 6 lashes to the back.
Tehelka justice…
Sexual harassment = 6 months leave and I’ll be back.
#TarunTejpal

1983…
Justice Chaudhury: Death to smugglers!
2013…
Justice Chaudhury: Six months leave for sexual harassment!
#Tehelka #TarunTejpal

I apologize and go on 6 months leave.
—Tarun Tejpal.
Dear Tehelka,
Oh, that’s the kind of apology you want from Narendra Modi for Godhra!

For every action (against Modi), there is an equal and opposite reaction (against his detractors).

The hate industry against Modi is far greater than the hate they claim he propagates.

The foundations of the entire anti-Modi alliance are nothing but a pack of cards.
They are destined to collapse sooner or later.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Terms and conditions for the Bharat Ratna…

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Congratulations! You are the proud recipient of a Bharat Ratna.

Here are the following terms and conditions that come along with it…

1. You cannot endorse Narendra Modi for Prime Minister in absolutely any way. That will severely devalue the Ratna. We may then consider withdrawing it.

2. You now rank seventh in order of precedence: Above CMs and Governors outside their respective States. That means outside Gujarat, you rank above Modi and hence he is beneath you and hence there is no need for you to endorse him in the first place! Plus if you visit Gujarat, then you will become below Modi, so under any circumstances, do not visit Gujarat!

3. You will sever all links (if any) with the Shiv Sena, the MNS, the RSS and any right-wing Fascist forces.

4. You will always be a paragon of secularism and shun anything to do with any form of communalism whatsoever.

5. This decision may be used for political mileage and we may invoke you in our election campaign.

6. We may be voted out in the next general elections and the next government may try to impose new terms and conditions on your Ratna. We hope then you will fondly remember who gave it to you in the first place!

Happy gloating!

Warm regards,

The Grand Old Party of India

This version by Sunil Rajguru