· They should have annual elections in Egypt and all the ballot boxes should be placed in Tahrir Square.
· A Chief Justice taking charge of a country after a show of force?
Sounds a bit like Judge Dredd!
· Foreign springs lead to regime changes.
Indian springs lead to an immediate winter where the regime freezes all goodwill and tries to curb all freedoms.
· Protestor 1: How I love spring!
Protestor 2: But it’s always spring in Egypt!
Protestor 1: I know!
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Pakistan: Aao maaro.
Italy: Aao maar ke jao.
China: Aao Internet pe maar ke jao.
Bangladesh: Aao raho.
Sri Lanka: Hum hi aake maar khaake waapis jaate hai.
Strongest weapons in the arsenal: Inter-Continental Ballistic Words and Cricket Bans.
© Sunil Rajguru
· Taliban: Can you imagine anything more dangerous than a girl with a schoolbook?
Kashmiri hardliner: Yes, a girl with a guitar!
· Right now a very dangerous Quit India movement is going on.
Freedom of Speech is being asked to Quit India.
· Old saying: The crying baby gets the milk.
New saying: The “offended” baby gets the cream.
· New Secularism Slogan: Have you made your State Rushdie free yet?
Rajasthan did so in 2012 and West Bengal in 2013. What about you?
· All the fringe groups have just moved to the centre of society in India.
· They would have us believe…
It’s OK for boys to play with guns and bombs, but not OK for girls to use schoolbooks and guitars.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Why did Musharraf cross the LoC and then cross back again?
Because he was a double crosser.
Why did the Indian official cross the LoC and visit Pakistan?
Because he foolishly believed that peace was on the other side.
Why did the Indian soldier cross the LoC?
To win a war.
Why did the Pakistani soldier cross the LoC?
To lose a war.
Why did the Indian citizen cross the LoC?
Because he wanted to have a blast.
Why did the Pakistani citizen cross the LoC?
Because he heard a blast on the other side and mistook it for Pakistan.
Why did the terrorist cross the LoC?
He stoutly denied it saying that since he believed both Kashhmir and PoK were one and there was no LoC and it was an imaginary line and he didn’t cross it at all!
Why did the bird cross the LoC?
Birds are true children of nature and nature know no boundaries.
Why did the chicken cross the LoC on Monday?
To get to the other side.
Why did the Pakistani soldier cross the LoC on Tuesday?
Because it was the chicken’s day off.
Why did the chicken cross the LoC?
Because it heard a lot of Pak-Pak-Pak and PoK-Pok-PoK on the other side.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
1947. I’ll save you from India: Jinnah.
1958. I’ll save you from this sham democracy: Ayub Khan.
1969. I’ll save you from Ayub: Yahya Khan.
1971. I’ll save you from these dictators: Zulfikar Ali Bhutto.
1977. I’ll save you from these jokers: Zia-ul-Haq.
1988. I’ll save you from all these dictators: Benazir Bhutto.
1999: I’ll save you from corruption: Musharraf.
2008: I’ll save you from Musharraf: Yet another Zardari.
Coming Soon: I’ll save you from Zardari, corruption and all the evils of Pakistan and then you will celebrate like crazy and get disillusioned in no time…
P.S. We are always there to save you: USA. (Main Hoon Na!)
Bottomline: Pakistan has been saved so many times, that it is now totally beyond saving.
© Sunil Rajguru
∙ Pak is Aman.
India is Asha.
Only Pak can bring peace.
India can only hope.
∙ Too much peace will leave you in pieces.
Some times it’s just best to stop talking peace.
Justice is far more important.
Respect our soldiers.
∙ Cong to Pak: Do not to test India’s patience!
Pak to Cong: We’ve been testing it for 65 years now, what’s a few decades more?
∙ Aman ki Asha=Chaman ki Bhasha.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru