Indian cricket musings…

∙ Can’t pace. Can’t spin. Can’t play pace. Can’t play spin.
But can still spin the ad market at a frantic pace.

∙ Dhoni sahab, mitti pe itna dhyaan doge to mitti main hi mil jaoge.
Insaan match khelta hai, pitch ki mitti nahin.

∙ Cricketer 1980: It is not about winning or losing, but playing well.
Cricketer 2012: It is not about winning or losing, but earning well.

∙ The pitch needs a Curator.
Indian cricket needs a Cure.

∙ Dhoni checklist. Can’t sack Fletcher. Can’t sack Gambhir. Can’t sack Sachin. Can’t sack self. So… sack curator!

∙ 2009: At least we are Test No. 1.
2010: At least we give a fight on foreign soil.
2011: At least we win at home.
2012: At least… F*** it! We still have all the money!

∙ As lucky as Dhoni has become As stubborn as Dhoni.
As godlike as Sachin has become As mortal as Sachin.
As ineffective as Duncan Fletcher remains.

Jab tak sooraj chand rahega,
Dhoni captain aur Sachin khelta rahega.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Overheard 11…

Wife: Swami!
PC: Woh naam mat lo mere saamne!

Party worker: Ki chhora Ganga kinare waala…
Maya: Mat gaana ga woh! Chhora haath dho kar hi peeche pad gaya hai UP ke!

Worker: Can sir…
Rahul: Cancer? Stop talking nonsense!

Sometime after the World Cup final…
Madam: Sachin is a real bharat ratna!
PC (To himself): Hmmm, now we’ll have to change the rules!

© Sunil Rajguru

The Sachin Tendulkar “99To100 Era”…

So much time is passing between Sachin’s 99 and 100th international century, that we can now officially call it the “99To100 Era”.

Let’s take a look at the earth-shattering events have already taken place in this Era so far…

India wins World Cup after 28 years… Osama finally captured and killed… Gaddafi toppled and killed after 42 years… Left rule ends in West Bengal after 34 years… Anna Hazare Lokpal Revolution… Djokovic becomes No. 1 to end Federer-Nadal Era … F1 comes to India… Amitabh becomes grandfather… Will-Kat wedding… Indian bowler takes fiver and scores century in Test after 40 years… The following people pass away… Sathya Sai Baba, Steve Jobs, MAK Pataudi, Jagjit Singh, Bhupen Hazarika, Shammi Kapoor, Joe Frazier, MF Hussain, Elizabeth Taylor, Amy Winehouse, Suresh Tendulkar…

Sachin Mahashatak Misses #16 & #17
Fact of the day: There have been close to 75 international centuries after Sachin Tendulkar scored his 99th international century.
Thought of the day: Will Sachin at least hit the world’s 100th international century after his own 99th?

Sidelight of India-West Indies Third Test at Wankhede Stadium:

The amazing consistency of R Ashwin…
Day 4: Hum match haar rahe hain!
Ashwin: Don’t worry main draw karata hu…
Day 5: Hum match jeet rahe hain!
Ashwin: Don’t worry main draw karata hu…

© Sunil Rajguru

The way we see Sachin…

Sachin enters the pitch.
Commentator: And this is the 50,000th time Sachin is entering a cricket pitch!

Sachin waits at the non-strikers end looking at Sehwag.
Commentator: And this is the 250th time Sachin is at the non-striker’s end!

Sehwag hits the ball and Sachin runs.
Commentator: And this is the 15,000th time Sachin is running a run for his partner.

Sachin plays a dot ball.
Commentator: And this is the 20,000th dot ball Sachin has played in his life!

Sachin hits a 4.
Commentator: And this is his 2000th ODI 4 and 3000th overall!

Sachin takes a single.
Commentator: And this is his 5000th single, what a record! What a player!

Sachin sips water from a bottle.
Commentator: And my statistician has just informed me that Sachin has just completed 20 years, 20 weeks, 20 days, 20 hours and 20 minutes of his international career! Wow! Gush!

Sehwag hits a 6.
Second Commentator: And what a glorious shot! Whenever…
Our original commentator cutting him short: …Sachin plays alongside him, Sehwag plays his best! What an inspirational player Sachin is!

Sachin…
Commentator

Moral of the story: Most surveys will show Sachin Tendulkar to be the greatest cricketer of all time. But there are other not so invisible players who do great deeds and a team’s victories are greater than the sum of all records.

© Sunil Rajguru