Yet more #Demonetization musings…

America: Credit is king.
India yesterday: Cash is king.
India today: Cashless is king.

Ole black money—Worthless.

Sonia agitating in the streets and giving interviews.
Pappu standing in ATM lines.
Both already appeared in court like commoners.

By the time the Opposition finishes with its nautanki and the courts finish analyzing it, #Demonetization would have been fully implemented.

For most Opposition parties, Demonetization is nothing but Demoralization.

Take news channels seriously and it’ll appear that in the last 10 days, 100 crores have been standing in line for 10 hours a day.

During recession…
“No vacancy” at offices.
During #Demonetization…
“No cash” at ATMs.

Khokas and Petis.
Post #Demonetization
Petis become khokla.
Khokas become petty.

Dear Mamata,
Widespread 2002 “pakki khabar” headline…
Vajpayee will remove Modi from politics.
Uske baad na jaane kitne aaye aur gaye hai!

When you try to dress up black money as white…
Kaale kaale mukhde pe gora gora chasma.

Sad to see Opposition leaders press the self-destruct button one by one.
They are bent on making Modi a dictator post-2019.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Yet more #Demonetization musings

2009—Manmohan will bring change.
2011—Anna Hazare will bring change.
2014—Modi will bring change.
2016—The bank manager will bring change.

ATM: Any Time Money.
STM: Some Time Money.

#MakeInIndia + #Demonetization
Eradicating Pakistani counterfeit notes.

Citizen in 2014: Modi I want you to change this country.
Citizen in 2016: Modi I want you bring lots of change in this country.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

So #Demonetization has hit them really really hard

Mr India, 2016.
Mogambo enters India, vows destruction.
#Demonetization happens.
Mogambo’s black money wiped out, flees India.
The End.

TV news.
20% coverage = All the benefits, pitfalls and long-term implications of #Demonetization.
80% coverage = Long queues.

Modi will lose 2002.
Modi will lose 2007.
Modi will lose 2014.
Modi will lose 2019 due to #Demonetization.

Modi doesn’t believe in ATM but ATDM.
ATDM = Any Time De-Monetization!

#BewafaSonamGupta nahin, par woh black note tha jispe us ka naam likha tha.
#BewafaSonamGupta ek thi, par bewafa black note lakhon main hai.

Baad main na kahana kucch bhi,
Pahale hi de doon warning,
Party chalegi till all the corrupt are in mourning,
Abhi to party shuru hui hai!

If America did #Demonetization of the $100 bill, forget America, the whole world would descend into chaos.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The pains of #Demonetization

India hasn’t been Modified yet.
We’re not even halfway there.

Open… 24 hours.
Open… Till stocks last!

If today you have a lot of change in the form of Rs 100 notes, then you are a Chhuttapati.

Government should have opened online liquor home delivery stores along with #Demonetisation.
Would have done roaring business.

Hit hard…
Lower/middle class with white money—Short run.
Rich class with black money—Long run.
Those with cards/net banking/PayTM.

#Demonetisation for the…
Common man—Long queues.
Bank employees—Long hours.
Online companies—Growth!
Opposition—Ammo to attack.

Beggar to common man—Bhagwaan ke naam pe chutte de de re baba!
Common man to bank—Bhagwaan ke naam pe chutte de de re baba!

We need an odd even scheme in banks.
On odd days you can deposit.
On even days you can withdraw.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

More #Demonitisation musings…

So India ends its Unofficial Counterfeit Money Union with Pakistan.
Only the Unofficial Free Border Union with Bangladesh is left.

Nehru created a mess.
Shastri cleaned it.
Indira-Rajiv created a mess.
Rao-Vajpayee cleaned it.
Sonia created a mess.
Modi cleaning it bigly.

Pahale Rs 500 aur Rs 1000 note ke gadde ki chori ka dar tha.
Ab chutte chori hone ka dar hai.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

#Demonitisation musings…

4-in-1 move…
1—Black money crackdown.
2—Target counterfeiters.
3—Restrict cash flow during elections.
4—Upgrade currency notes.

Gandhi on Rs 5 note.
Gandhi on Rs 10 note.
Gandhi on Rs 20 note.
Gandhi on Rs 50 note.
Gandhi on Rs 100 note.
Gandhi on Rs 500 note.
Gandhi on Rs 1000 note.
Gandhi on Rs 2000 note.

A royal pain in the short run.
A real game changer in the long run.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru