Tag Archives: Dynasty

Congress sinking further musings…

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Congress is a family business.
Pappu is the next CEO.
India is the market.
This business has many clients.
Intense fight will continue till 2019.

Voters showed great intolerance to Congress in 2014.
They are right. Intolerance is rising. It may be worse for them in 2019.

By the time Pappu finally becomes Prime Minister, he will be a frustrated bitter old man.
India’s future is doomed.

Congress gets 44 seats in 2014 polls.
Voter: I bet you can’t go any lower!
Congress: Challenge accepted!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Tere baap ka party hai kya?

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Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Naveen: Errr, “Biju” Janata Dal. Isn’t it pretty obvious?

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Omar: Actually mere dadaji ne ye party banaya tha.

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Akhilesh: Ha, isi liye ye haal hai, koi sunta hi nahin mera!

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Pappu: Nahin. Baap, maa, chachu, daadi, uske papa, uske papa ke papa…

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Ajit: Arre! Mama-bhatija bhi kuch cheez hota hai bhai!

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Derek O Brien: Mind your language! It’s just Didi Didi Didi!

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Kumarswamy: Kya farak padta hai. Party hi bacha nahin hai!

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Alagiri: Nahin, bhai ka ho raha hai.

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Uddhav: Eh? Tu jaanta nahin mera baap kaun tha?

Tere baap ka party hai kya?
Chandrababu: Mere sasurji ek mahaan aadmi the.

© Sunil Rajguru

Alternative careers for sinking Congress leaders…

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Rahul Gandhi: Fashion model.

Priyanka Vadra: Brand Ambassador to the real estate industry.

Sonia Gandhi: Permanent Ambassador to Italy.

Digvijay Singh: Conspiracy theory TV host.

Shashi Tharoor: Sonia’s official biographer.

Natwar Singh: Regular author, challenger to Chetan Bhagat.

Sushil Kumar Shinde: Successor to Ahmed Patel.

Kapil Sibal: Back to Full-time lawyer defending umpteen Congress scams.

Manish Tewari: Anchor of TV channel Congress Now challenging Arnab.

Abhishek Manu Singhvi: TV reality show participant.

Mani Shankar Aiyar: Rajiv Gandhi’s official biographer, series of many books.

Jairam Ramesh: Pappu’s official biographer.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Congress mobile terminology

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Sonia: Out of your coverage area.

Rahul: Network error.

Spokespersons: Voice with no data.

PM: Silent mode.

Spokespersons: Loud ringtone and vibrate mode.

SMS: Something that spreads baseless rumours.

MMS: Parody of the original MMS! Ban it!

Mobile Internet: Twitter! Facebook! Ban it!

International roaming: If it concerns the dynasty, then RTI doesn’t apply.

Talk time: If it’s Congress spokespersons, 24X7. All others: Zero.

EDGE: Enhanced Dynastic Rate for Gandhis’ Evolution.

Voice over Internet Protocol: Can we actually yell at people while they surf the Internet!

1G: Motilal Nehru, first generation Nehru-Gandhi dynasty.

2G: Spectrum for scam allocation.

3G: Future scam potential spectrum.

4G: Sonia, fourth generation dynasty.

5G: Rahul, fifth generation dynasty. And like 5G (the technology), is very undercooked and years away from maturing and hitting the market.

These Versions by Sunil Rajguru