Category Archives: Cricket & Sports

When India chased 350+ with Australia, again!

Posted on by
Reply

Aussie jugalbandi…
Batsmen: Aaj phir jeene ki tamanna hai!
Bowlers: Aaj phir marne ka iraada hai!

PJ of the day…
Hamne ek virat score khada kiya hai: Aussies.
Hamne Virat ko hi khada kar diya: Indians.

Kohli ke khilaaf 300 ko defend karna mushkil hi nahi namumkin hai.
Iska hal saare mulko ke coaches dhoond rahe hain.

Aussie fielders Darr gaye and the bowling stuttered…
I hate you K… K… K… K… Kohli.

The series is now tied at 2-2-2.
(India-Australia-Rain)
In Bengaluru, rain always has the advantage.

Batting ke Shikhar par ek Dhanwaan baitha hua hai.

Indian bowling….
Isssshhhhhh! Sharma ke bina bhi sharma raha hai!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The Deewar between Mr Srinivasan and justice…

Posted on by
Reply

Question: Now that your son-in-law is seriously implicated in the match-fixing scandal, shouldn’t you sign your own resignation letter?

Srinivasan: Ha, main resignation letter sign karoonga, lekin main akele nahin karoonga, main sabse pahale sign nahin karoonga… jao pahale us Congress President ka sign lekar aao, jiske damaad ke khilaaf allegations hain, jao pahale un saare netao ka sign lekar aao, jinke damaad ke khilaaf allegations hain… uske baad… uske baad mere bhai tum jis resignation letter pe sign karoonga, main karoonga…

Retort: Doosro ke paap gin-ne se tumhare apne paap nahin kam ho sakte…

Srinivasan: Bas, bas, woh Bollywood tha, Indian real life main mujrim hi hamesha jeet-ta hain.

This spoof by Sunil Rajguru

Ashes and DRS musings…

Posted on by
Reply

DRS is a bit like the movie Inception.
Decisions within decisions.
Technologies within technologies.
You never can be sure of whether the batsman was ever really out or not.

DRS = Decision Review by Schrodinger.
Every decision is out and not out at the same time.

Every decision given by the DRS has a parallel and opposite decision in a parallel universe.

Australia was playing such good Test cricket after ages that the Rain God couldn’t believe it and came to watch.
‪#‎Ashes‬

Pahale Aussies ke dreams ashes ban gaye.
Phir us pe paani pad gaya.
‪#‎Ashes‬

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

General cricketing musings…

Posted on by
Reply

Now that Dawood has been chargesheeted in the spot-fixing case, you can remake Jannat and D-Day in the same movie.

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
DRS.
DRS who?
There’s a problem and we need to talk about it.
‪#‎Ashes‬

England: DRS se aaye, durust aaye.
Australia: We need DRStic measures to get out of this rut.
‪#‎Ashes

Yesterday, Australia got up and forgot what a bad team they were and look at what happened!
Let’s see if they remember today or continue to plod on in ignorance.
‪#‎Ashes‬

Lalit Modi: Main BCCI lautna chahata hu.
Dial tone: Kripayaa intezaar keejiye, aap kartaar main hai.

Today Mr Srinivasan logged into his Twitter account after ages to rally his Followers and was surprised to find that they had collectively Blocked him.
(Note: Replace Twitter with BCCI)

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Srinivasan to return?

Posted on by
Reply

“I’ll be back.”
Arnold Schwarzenegger, 1984.
Jagmohan Dalmiya, 2006.
N Srinivasan, 2013.
(Mohinder Amarnath: Dunno how many times!)

BCCI and political parties have an RTI of their own.
Right To Innocence.
OR
Right To (declare anyone) Innocent.

The BCCI does believe in DRS.
N Srinivasan was given out and he appealed.
Now his Third Umpire has overruled the original decision and he’s coming back.

Tere paas kya hai?
Srinivasan: Mere paas Ma(hi) hai!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Ashes first Test musings…

Posted on by
Reply

· They may have lost narrowly, but the Aussie Phoenix has partially risen from the Ashes!
Series on!

· Q: How would Australia describe the first Ashes Test?
A: DisastRouS.

· The movie based on the first 2013 Ashes Test should be called Dus.
Exciting and lengthy Tenth wicket stand in both innings for Australia!

· If Dhoni was batting for Australia at this stage, then the English would already have been throwing up during lunch.
Politics in Egypt always has a Spring in its step.

· One of the most tense lunches in the history of Ashes.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru