· 1970s: Ek ek ko chun chun ke maroonga: Dharmendra.
2013: Ek ek ko chun chun ke maroonga: Pranabda.
· Pranab and MMS are both Undertakers.
While one is allowing the killing of death penalty convicts, the other is allowing the killing of the government.
· Jailor: What’s up?
Death row inmate: I don’t know, I am feeling de‘Prez’zed nowadays.
· Congress logo…
When Governance Hangs, the Government Hangs.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
· Nitish: Ek mayaan main do talwaar nahi raha sakte…
Modi: Woh to theek hai, par doosra talwaar kahaan hai?
· That Modi is an extremely boastful character, especially when compared to Rahul!
(That Modi has many achievements to boast of and Rahul has none is a different story altogether.)
· Like Good Cop Bad Cop, Modi and Rahul play Good PM Bad PM regularly.
· Since we call him NaMo, why don’t we call the other guy RaGa?
· Action speaks louder than words.
In Rahul Gandhi’s case, his action is mute and his words say even less.
· Modi can’t spell agriculture.
Congress can’t spell grace, humility, honesty and maybe even governance.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
One beautiful old book surpasses a trillion online bytes.
One real world trumps a billion virtual worlds.
One genuine disciple beats a million Followers.
One Rupee spent wisely offline beats 100,000 virtual bucks.
One real, small and humble farm beats 10,000 on Farmville.
One true friend beats a 1000 on Facebook.
One warm offline appreciation beats a 100 likes.
One game played in Mother Earth’s lap beats 10 virtual games played simultaneously.
One real life lived genuinely beats a false virtual life full of lies and make-believe.
© Sunil Rajguru
Modification: The notion that Narendra Modi will convert the whole country to his point of view and become Prime Minister in the end.
Modivation: Modi’s speeches, which leave all the other politicians far behind.
Modisty: The opposite of Modesty, according to his critics, since the Chief Minister just keeps listing his achievements in Gujarat.
Modirnty: A new age where the Gujarat model will be replicated in India.
Modirate: Definitely not a moderate because he supports Modi.
Modim: Because he converts analog anti-votes into digital pro-votes.
Auto-pilot Modi: Modi seems to be automatically rising up to a point where there will be no competition for the PM’s post within the party.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Then: It’s all fixed! (Fate, it’s all in God’s hands.)
Now: It’s all fixed! (Match-fixing, mega bucks.)
Then: Show me the money! (After I have played a good game and served my country well.)
Now: Show me the money! (Before I even think of playing the game.)
Then: You can’t change the past! (Once a match is over, it’s over.)
Now: You can’t change the past! (Try telling that to the Tour de France!)
Then: You dope! (Drugs like LSD will wreck your career.)
Now: You dope! (Take enhancing drugs, just don’t get caught.)
Then: Cricket! (The Gentleman’s game.)
Now: Cricket! (The Banker’s game.)
© Sunil Rajguru
IPL player: I’m a millionaire!
Business tycoon: I’m a billionaire!
Indian economy: I’m a trillionaire!
Diggy Raja: I’m so full of air!
(The need to say something to anything thrown at him)
The conundrum…
Who was he first to make his millionth inane TV byte?
Diggy Raja or Suhel Seth?
What if there were no TV news channels?
Diggy Raja: Well then, I’d be unemployed!
In the US there are millions of conspiracy theories spread via newspapers, magazines and the Internet.
In India we have a one-man industry called Diggy Raja.
© Sunil Rajguru