Just because you didn’t call or message…

Indian telecos apply for bankruptcy due to greatly reduced calls and SMSes…

Telecallers seek counselling over rising feeling of loneliness and worthlessness…

Indian mobile consumers feel strangely unwanted too…

Family discord sets in as consumers yell at their families in the absence of telecallers to vent steam…

Minister of Health and Family Welfare steps in to request the Telecom Ministry to reverse the decision to limit spam calls and SMSes in the interest of the health and welfare of all families in the country…

The Sensex tanks due to negative sentiment and the reverse domino effect pushes the global economy further into recession…

© Sunil Rajguru

2G musings…

Of course Manmohan has a magic wand to end corruption…
Jajajantaram Mamantaram Chidambaram…
Voila! He’s innocent!

World’s best boss…
Court: Why can’t you investigate him?
CBI: But I just gave him the World’s Best Boss Award!
Where is it now?
PC: I gave the award to MMS!
MMS: And I gave it to Madam!
Madam: And I’m saving it for beta!

2 be or not 2 be…
This year, Manmohan Singh completed 20 years as a politician.
So the 2decade old politico, the 2nd most powerful person in India into his 2nd term is leading a 2nd string government thanks to the 2G scam…
…and UPA2G has been reduced to a Tu Tu Main Main slanging match all round.
Touche!
What will Hamlet Singh do now?

Meanwhile, singing is heard in two party headquarters, one by an 83-year-old man and one by a 41-year-old youth…
Hum honge Pradhan Mantri, hum honge Pradhan Mantri ek din,
Ho ho ho ho,
Man main hain vishwas, poora hai vishwas…

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

…Static from Pakistan…

… Rabbani ki jawani… Haqqani ki qurbani…  Kayani ki manmaani… SOS to US… US to use Pak… Pak to use US… US-Pak useless… Amreeka-Pak bhai bhai… Amreeka-Pak bye-bye… ISI US you… Sab ka hai bhool… Ulta har usool… Khatre main sabki jaan… Phir bhi Amreeka mahaan… Doublespeak Wikileak… Come and take a peek… Obama ka drama… Osama ka hungama… Musharraf in a huff… International handcuff… Zardari harakiri… Pak terror baby… Deadly Headley… To be or not to be… Major Iqbal ka jaal… Sab hain behaal… Lashkar bas kar… Jeeta tera darr… Pak ka kata nak… Kya karega Barack… 26/11 nahin hai 9/11… Bhoolo 11/7 aur 13/7… Bharat chal hat… Stay in your rut… Dawood n the hood… Any moolah’s jolly good… Ilyas still the boss… India can stay cross… Osama se Pak O fasa… Terror itihaas racha… CIA’s no to ISI… ISI’s no CIA… Nuke ki bhook will puke… Zara tu ruk… Kam tamaam… Balm’s the harm… Kya cool hai hum… Barood, terror, bomb aur gham…

This version by Sunil Rajguru

A new way to measure wealth in India…

If you have Rs 33 per day in India, then you are rich.

There are 121 crore Indians.

So with Rs 3993 crores, you can make each and every Indian rich for a day.

A Forbes billionaire can make every Indian rich for approximately a day.

Hasan Ali can make every Indian rich for about a fortnight.

Mukesh Ambani can make every Indian rich for about a month.

The only person who can make India rich for more than one month is Andimuthu Raja.

Bottomline: So how wealthy are you?
That depends on how many Indians you can make rich for how many days.

This version by Sunil Rajguru