Lokpal? Please simply laugh out loud…

In LOKPAL, the K stands for Kiran Bedi, the P stands for Prashant Bhushan and the A stands for Anna Hazare.

Now you’ll ask, what about the letters that are left.

What are the letters that are left?

L… O… L…

LOL!

So you really think that a strong Lokpal Bill will be passed?

LOL!

© Sunil Rajguru

In August, Anna had said… I’ll be back…

After the Fellowship of the Team Anna and The Two Fasts, we are looking at the Return of the Hunger King in December when Mr Hazare Goes to Delhi (the Sin City) to complete the Lord of the Fastings trilogy. But will Anna show True Grit and be The Rock or will he simply continue to call the government Liar Liar? The Congress on its part will look at Team Anna and say Look Who’s Talking!, continuing to call it the Enemy of the State.

What Lies Beneath the news? There will no point in Switching Channels as all of them will show the same ole Fight Club and The Social Network will be abuzz again with activity. The common man, meanwhile, is increasingly bent on showing his Fist of Fury.

But still, The Tihar Redemption looks unlikely and the UPA won’t rely on Transformers or go in for a new Avatar. It’s all badly Tangled:  The UPA could well sink like the Titanic The Day After Tomorrow in 2012. So all in all it does appear a Mission: Impossible.

India is all about Eat Pray Love? Come December and it could well only be Fast Swear Hate.

Bonus…

More Hollywood ways of looking at the April-August-December (if it takes place) fasts…

The Anna Identity. The Anna Supremacy. The Anna Ultimatum. (Bourne)

Anna. Anna Reloaded. Anna Revolutions. (Matrix)

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

News in Limericks 4

There was this movie called Ra.One,
Which was worse than this film called Raavan,
But it made its crores n crores n crores,
Despite all its bores n bores n bores,
Aur abhi viewers ka aa gaya hai maran!

There was this concert of Metallica,
That finally hit New Delhi in India,
But it quickly became a no show,
And the fans just didn’t want to go,
Aur sab ne mil kar stage ka barricade ko hi phod diya!

There was this Team of the Anna,
Jiska unity gaya khaane ganna,
One talked Kashmir and two did quit,
The others didn’t like it one little bit,
Aur ab credibility solah aane se ho gaya chaar aana!

There was this man called Diggy Raja,
Jiska jab dekho bajta tha baaja,
He talked n talked and talked,
And talked n talked and talked,
Hey Bhagwan Bharat ko kyun dee itni badi saza!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Star Wars and Corruption Wars

Inspired by the two Hollywood Star Wars trilogies, Bollywood is making its own Corruption Wars trilogies. A sneak peek at what they are all about…

Episode I: The Anna Menace.
A fasting Yoda-like Phantom Hazare bursts into the national scene foxing the high and mighty of the land. He is being compared to Mahatma Gandhi. But doesn’t the Mahatma copyright lie solely with the Congress Empire? Sacrilege!

Episode II: The Attack of the Clones.
Main bhi
Anna, tu bhi Anna, saara desh hai Anna! Anna topis everywhere! Another copyright infringement on the Mahatma Gandhi topi legacy! But how does an Empire fight against thousands of Anna Clones?

Episode III: Revenge of the Sith.
Both the Apprentice (Prime Minister) and Master (Congress Empire President) take their revenge when they end the Fast, agitation, get the Parliament to promise absolutely nothing concrete and after a few weeks it’s business as usual.

Episode IV: Corruption Wars: A New Hope.
But the fight against corruption continues and the Congress Empire keeps going on the backfoot as more and more skeletons keep jumping out of the closet. Tihar keeps adding more and more politicians. Bad news just refuses to go away even as offices like the CAG and courts tighten the screws.

Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back.
The Jedi brotherhood is almost disbanded. Team Anna is in total disarray. Hazare is on a maun vrat. Prashant Bhushan has been neutralized. Kiran Bedi faces corruption charges herself. Arvind Kejriwal has the I-T sword hanging on his head. Two other members quit and Justice Hegde has serious doubts about the whole campaign.

Episode VI: Return of the Anna.
Can Anna Hazare make a comeback? Can he silence his critics once and for all? Can he keep his promise to the nation? Can a strong Lokpal Act finally become a reality? Will electoral reform happen? This concluding trilogy is among the most eagerly awaited blockbusters in recent times.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Absolutely faaltu coincidences

Notice how major players in the UPA have the letters A-N-N-A in them?

(Arthath, in sab main ANNA hain!)

soNiA gANdhi

mANmohAN singh

pAlaNiappAN chidambaram

Ak ANtoNy

ANANd sharma

jayANthi NAtarajan

m kAruNANidhi

Others don’t know how to spell ANNA and do so with only three letters A-N-A, so do they require a bit of name-changing numerology magic?

(Arthath, in sab main sirf thoda ANNA (barah ANA?) hain!)

prANAb mukherjee

sAlmNA khurshid

mANish tiwAri

Abhishek mANu singhvi

reNukA chowdAry

AmbikA soNi

Ajay mAkaN

This version by Sunil Rajguru