Dravid: Did all the work and someone else got the limelight.
Gandhi: Did absolutely nothing and still got the limelight.
Dravid: Saved India on many an occasion.
Gandhi: India needs to be saved from him.
Dravid: The Wall—Nothing could go past him.
Gandhi: The Gate—Everything goes through him.
Dravid: Retired at 38.
Gandhi: At 38 was still a political baby.
Dravid: People were ready to walk miles to watch him bat.
Gandhi: People want to walk miles away when he speaks.
© Sunil Rajguru
The original Baingan ka bharta joke…
One wife said to another, my husband is so strange!
On Monday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he couldn’t stop praising how delicious it was.
On Tuesday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he said it was good.
On Wednesday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he smiled but said nothing.
On Thursday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he ate it quietly.
On Friday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he glared at me non-stop.
On Saturday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he stormed off without eating it.
On Sunday I gave him Baingan ka bharta and he actually threw it at my face!
One BCCI selector said to another, these Indian fans are so strange!
When we sent the Big 3 to the tour of Australia in 2003-04, the fans called them the greatest!
When we sent the Big 3 to the tour of England in 2007, the fans said very good.
When we sent the Big 3 to the tour of Australia in 2007-08, some fans started grumbling.
When we sent the Big 3 to the tour of England in 2011, the fans started screaming and shouting!
When we played the Big 3 in the home tour of 2011, the fans actually started asking why we were playing them.
When we are persisting with the Big 3 in the tour of Australia in 2011-12, the fans actually want all 3 to be sacked!!!
This version by Sunil Rajguru
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
PC.
PC who?
PC you see in Parliament, but PC we no see, says the Opposition and decision making goes out of the window. Chee chee!
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Dawood.
Dawood who?
They would still deny the existence of all dons, terrorists and accused hiding in their country.
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Rahul.
Rahul who?
Dravid, if you want to save a Test match and Gandhi if you want to save the Congress.
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Kasab.
Kasab who?
Kasab ka hisaab aaya hain, Rs 16 crore spent in 3 years!
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Right now there is a bargain sale going on in international cricket…
Ten Indian wickets are available for the price of one English wicket.
Series report…
England thrashes Rahul Dravid 4-0. The rest of the team for some mysterious reason just failed to show up.
The English cricketers now love Indian food.
They’ve been having the Indians for lunch and tea for quite some time now.
What’s the opposite of: As fit as a fiddle?
As unfit as an Indian cricketer.
The BCCI’s solution will be probably to have many many more international matches per year.
That way the number of matches won annually may remember the same.
Maybe God was too busy watching Anna Hazare and just forgot about the Indian cricket team…
(Reference: India-England cricket Test match at Oval from August 18-22)
These versions by Sunil Rajguru