Tag Archives: MS Dhoni

Oval massacre musings…

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(Ref: Fifth India-England Test.)

In 2011, the English coach showed his cricket team Lagaan.
He is still getting his ROI over that masterstroke to this very day.

2011: 0-4.
Ab tumhe teeguna lagaan dena padega.
2012: 1-2.
Ab tumhe paanch guna lagaan dena padega.
2014: 1-3.
Ab… abbe tumne hame bankrupt kar diya teen-teen din main match khatam kar ke. Kam ticket sales aur ads se barbaad ho gaye hum! Ab dus guna lagaan dene ka bhi koi faayada nahin hai!

The next angry birds game will feature Indian batsmen as the targets and become popular among cricket fans.

Critic: What kind of a game is Test cricket? You don’t get a result in 5 days?
Indian fan: Oh, we are masters. We can get a result in 3 days flat.

The Indian batsmen’s favourite nursery rhyme is…
Ring a Ring o’ Roses.
They especially love the part…
Atishoo, atishoo, we all fall down!

Team India seniors get Rs 5 lakh per Test, or Rs 1 lakh a day.
By losing in 3 days, they’re getting Rs 1.67 lakh a day.
Boora khelo, jyaada paisa kamao!!!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Total time pass of a vella Indian cricket fan…

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How the Indian cricket team celebrated Independence Day…

The 11 batsmen scored the following amount of runs…
18-0-4-6-0-82-5-13-5-1-7.

If you rearrange the above numbers, then you get…
15-08-2014. 68. 1,3,5,7…..

15-08-2014 stands for 15th August 2014, the Independence Day on which they scored these runs.

68 stands for India’s 68th Independence Day.

The progressive sequence 1,3,5,7… stands for the resolve on this day to keep doing better from now on.

Ref: Fifth India-England Test at the Kensington Oval.
#IndVsEng #Oval

© Sunil Rajguru

Day 1 musings from Oval Test…

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(Ref: Fifth India-England Test.)

India’s last 3 Test innings, runs scored by…
All batsmen = 117.
All bowlers = 141.
Dhoni = 180.

Team India is the new brand ambassador for Rupa.
With so many rest days after early Test results they’ll say…
Ye aaraam ka maamla hai!

Indian Test batsmen looking at the red cricket ball and singing…
Ye laal rang kab mujhe chhodega…

Dhoni’s autobiography will be…
Last Man Standing.
First in ODIs, now in Tests too.

Tests then…
Aaj Sachin century maarega kya?
Now…
Aaj India century maarega kya?

August 15, 1947: Indians get Independence from the English.
August 15, 2014: Indian batsmen get quick Independence from English bowlers.

Finish the Tests in 3 days, destroy the ECB economy and relax for 2 days.
Smart strategy!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Lord’s Test victory musings…

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Charles Dickens on Ishant Sharma…
He was the best of bowlers, he was the worst of bowlers, he had a mind of wisdom, he had a mind of foolishness, his bowling was the epoch of belief, his bowling was the epoch of incredulity, he was the season of Light, he was the season of Darkness, he gave his fans the spring of hope, he gave his fans the winter of despair…
#IndVsEng #Lords

Captain MS Dhoni is in the Guinness Book of World Records for the largest collection of victory stumps in the world.

Rohit ka majaak udaaya: ODI 200 maara.
Jadeja ka majaak udaaya: Sir ban gaya.
Ishant ka majaak udaaya: 7-for@Lord’s.
Ab kiska majaak udaane waale ho?
#TeamIndia

A tale of three Sharmas…
Ishant on the field.
Rohit on the bench.
Anushka in the pavilion.

Strange Twitter…
Ishant took 7.
Bhuvi took 6.
Rahane hit a ton.
Vijay belted 95.
Sir Jadeja dazzled.
And Virat Kohli is trending!

Indian bowlers treat the innings like a video game…
Level 1—Top order—Easy to dismiss.
Level 2—Middle order—Average.
Level 3—Tail—Very difficult.

(Reference: India-England Second Test, 2014)

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Lords Test victory: Numerology for the sake of numerology…

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7 is captain MS Dhoni’s lucky number.

Ishant Sharma took 7 wickets for the first time ever 7 years after he made his Test debut in 200”7”.

In both innings of India a match saving/winning partnership came after the 7th wicket fell.

The victory took place on the 7(7X1)th month of the 14(7X2)th year and on the date 21 (7X3) while India won after 28(7X4) years in Lords.

(Reference: India-England Second Test, 2014)

© Sunil Rajguru

More Mahi musings…

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· There was this Mahi—a real bowlers’ pain,
Who made sure the last over didn’t go in vain,
Not once, but again
And again and again,
And again and again and again!

· One reason that I personally rate Dhoni higher than Sachin is because you can get tired of records but you can never get tired of victories.

· Yet another leadership change in Jharkhand!
The only consistent leader from Jharkhand since its inception has been Dhoni!

· Melting point of Ice Man Dhoni = 50.1° where ° = Overs (in a 50 over match).

© Sunil Rajguru