· India needs the very mildest excuse to burst crackers at night or set up a pandal with 20,000 watt loudspeakers and spoil everyone’s sleep: Any vague festival, a cricket victory, a marriage…

· Obama is laying all the groundwork in his first term. All the achievements will flow like a waterfall in his second term.

· 2010 Commonwealth Games Baton Relay will cover the longest route. That symbolizes the longest delay in constructing Commonwealth Games infrastructure.

· BJP ke paas bache the do bade cheez: Karnataka aur Gujarat. Karnataka main infighting aur Gujarat main Flu. BJP ko bura waqt kab khatam hoga?

· First it was: Are you online or offline. Now: Are you Waveline?

(30 October)

·  Idiom: Hoist by one’s own petard. Meaning: Destroyed by the very device one had intended for another. Replace: Device with terrorist, one with Pak, another with India. Sad. Very sad. Not good for India in the long run.

· Dhon-Dhoni-dhun-run!

(29 October)

· Says Facebook: “News Feed” picks stories that “we think you’ll enjoy”… Oh yeah Facebook! Now you can read my mind too!

· Bengaluru aur Baarish. Do purane dost mil rahe hain.

· All the Indian PMs have talked soooooo much on peace in Kashmir, so how come none of them won a Nobel Peace Prize?

· TV watching kills brain cells and is not actually harmful for eyesight. Computers are good for the brain and usually computer screens are very harmful for the eyes. So…

(28 October)

· 2 Elephants fight. Grass gets trampled. 2 Tigers fight. Congress Grass flourishes.

· Dost. Man ka Jharoka. Pasand. Deewar. Parchiya. KisanNagar. Bhai Logon ka Yudh. Prashna-Uttar jo apni dil ki baat, bhoot kaal, vartaman kaal aur bhavishya kaal sab bataye… Yahi sab hain CheheraKitaab Meri Jaan!

(22 October)

· The climate is sure changing! The ice is cracking. India is warming up to the US on Kyoto, trade and other international issues. Ram Jaane peeth peeche kya khichdi pak rahi hain!

· Have you noticed how there’s been a sudden spurt of violence in Pak ever since Obama won the Peace Prize?

· New Delhi. 1982 Asiads. 2010 Commonwealth. 2040 Olympics? (I have a dream…)

(21 October)

· The Diwali Wars have finally ended! For days the atmosphere, human ear drums & respiratory systems have been under incessant attack from noise and smoke. Har Bhartiya insaan paise ko dhue main udaata chala gaya… P.S. In other news, Burnol met their annual targets.

(20 October)

· Happy (Cough! Cough!) Diwali. P.S. I want to see and feel Diwali, not smell and hear it 24/7.

(18 October)

· It’s fast turning out to be an Indian Pointless League

· Hope one day we all can have a Noisefree and Smokefree Diwali. Happy Diwali!

(17 October)

· Indo-Chinese ties: Crouching Dragon, Hidden Tiger

(14 October)

· Obama finally reaches the cult status of George W Bush.
All the stand-up comedians are making fun of him.

· Faith can move Mountains. Hope can win Nobel Prizes.

· We are truly the Gypsy Generation, hum logo ka koi thikana nahin hain job/citywise.

· Obama is donating his prize money to charity. The prize itself he’ll donate to Pakistan, that’s his only Hope to Peace.

· They are renaming the Nobel Prize, from now on it will be called the Nobel Prize for Hope.

(10 October)

· 2010: Obama gets Nobel Literature Prize for his books and compiled speeches
2011: Obama get Nobel Economics Prize for taking the world out of recession
2012: Obama gets Nobel Medicine Prize for healthcare reforms
2013: Obama gets second Nobel Peace Prize for actually bringing peace, the first time he got for just talking about it…

· I guess Obama must be as surprised as we are. Let’s see how “Peaceful” the rest of his term is. For us, it just means more and more billions in aid to our dear neighbour…

· What will happen to these trillions of words we are writing in cyberspace…

· In the last 25 years, Aus, SL and Pak are the only teams to have won an ODI WC. They are in one group and India is in another. It doesn’t get simpler than that.

(9 October)

© Sunil Rajguru

Facebook=Cyberia, where we all have a life sentence. We get out on parole from time to time, but we always have to return.
September 25

Krishna and Taliban. While the Junior Minister’s miniscule gaffes are being blown out of proportion, the Senior Minister’s major ones are being quietly swept under the carpet.
September 25

The KPL came and went. Did anybody really notice???
September 25

Opened a Facebook Fortune Cookie and got the following fortune: “Stop wasting your time on Facebook and Fortune Cookies and get back to work, that’s the only way you’ll be able to make any kind of Fortune!”
September 23

Season 1: Rakhi ka Swayamwar. Season 2: Rahul ka Swayamwar. Season 3: When Rakhi met Rahul. Season 4: Rakhi-Rahul Splitsvilla. Season 5: Jilted lovers of Rahul and Rakhi form a reality couples show…
September 23

Why do Indian politicians have such a long lifespan?
September 18

Shashi Tharoor is the nearest politician to “People Like Us”
September 18

Recession! It looks like we may be sighting the half-way mark. But if that’s so, will the second half be as long as the first half or longer?
September 17

Shashi Tharoor is such a Tweet Fellow!
September 17

Facebook Status ko status quo kitna der rakh sakte hain?
September 17

Last time Eng won the Ashes, they crashed and went on a losing spree for years. At 0-5, they look like doing it again.
September 16

I guess Aus Open main bahut maja aayega… FedNadaldelPotro zindabad!
September 16

2009. When Sonia Gandhi travels economy class, 5 rows are booked for security/entourage. 1946. When Mahatma Gandhi travels Third Class, 2-3 bogies are booked for family/supporters. Austerity Congress Style!
September 16

Our whole life is a result of a series of miracles and we don’t even realize it!
September 11

I still don’t get it! Every politician is worth hundreds of crores and still he has to show an amazing amount of hypocritic austerity and wear kurta and not stay in star hotels.
September 11

Injured Premier League. Jaise koi theek hota hain, doosra koi injured ho jata hain.
September 11

Jet was India’s No. 1 airline. Now, it’s so sick, I tell you.
September 11

Jet pilots should have claimed “suspected” Swine Flu. Then everyone would have just left them alone.
September 11

West Bengal has just logged off. (Actually, had it ever logged on in the first place?)
September 11

My son says that it’s necessary for small kids to scream every now and then for no reason to reduce the stress in their life…
September 10

When politicians squander crores of public money, no-one says anything. When Tharoor spends lakhs of his personal money to stay in a 5-star hotel, Pranab Babu goes red-faced. Is desh ka kuch nahin ho sakta.
September 10

Prashna: Jeevan ke baad kya aata hain? Ans: G2
September 7

2011. Nano in full production. Many cars. 2nd hand market crashes. Many more cars. Recession ends, economy booms. Many more luxury cars and 2-wheelers. So enjoy a comparitively less congested 2009.
September 7

Big B = Big Boss Means Colors stays Big Boss, Star fading, Z will still struggle to maintain A grade
September 5

If you believe in a miracle, it will happen…
September 4

I like Friends. But all these Seasons back and forth on multiple channels gives me a headache. It’s like doing a virtual time travel in their lives all the time.
September 4

If you really want a thing badly enough then the whole universe conspires to see that you get it. Problems: 1. Knowing what you really want. 2. Wanting it badly enough. 3. Fear of fulfilment. Where will I go from there? … So the universe keeps waiting.
September 3

The head of a 76 million population state vanishes without a trace for atleast 10-12 hours. Planes, fighters and other forces search… Makes us realize how powerless we can be at times. Sad!
September 2

God always gives you subtle hints on which direction you should take in life. If you don’t listen, then he keeps showing you signs. If you still don’t get it, then he gives you a hard celestial kick in that direction. Don’t believe me?… Analyze your life objectively and you’ll see it’s true.
September 2

An old family friend used to say: The government pays government servants to sit on their chairs. YOU have to pay them to make them work.
September 2

In the olden days, when a cricketer stopped wearing his country’s colours, it was RIP for his career. Now, it’s more like RIIPL.
September 2

A lot of gyms opening in my area… the Recession Effect?
September 1

Many of my FB friends I haven’t met and yet I interact with them regularly. What are they? Virtual Friends? Internet Friends? Pen Friends? Keyboard Friends?
September 1

© Sunil Rajguru

Is Concrete Jungle se Mujha Bachao!
August 31

In Sprite of their excellent ad campaign, I still prefer Pepsi
August 31

MJ finally reaches the cult status of Elvis! People claim that he is now alive.
August 31

Nowadays RSS feeds drive the BJP. Incoming RSS feeds decide strategy and important issues. Outgoing RSS feeds supply inside dope to the media.
August 31

The Force is always with Mallya
August 31

JP ruled from 1977-80. Then it disintegrated. JD ruled from 1989-91, 1996-98. The it disintegrated. BJP ruled from 1998-2004. Then it disintegrated??? The curse of the Second Party in India?
August 28

If anything, the BJP has suddenly won the battle of TRPs. For an outsider watching Indian TV, it’s as if the Congress just doesn’t exist…
August 28

“What’s on your mind?” is incorrect. It’s actually “What do you want to say?”
August 28

I think we should Leapfrog straight to 4G. With the way its going, it’ll take the same amount of time as 3G
August 28

The maturity of a nation should be judged by the way it disposes its garbage.
August 27

Sinha Salvo. Jaswant Astra. Shourie Chakra. Sudarshan Chakra. It’s open war now and the BJP has just become the MBJP: MahaBharat Janata Party
August 26

The Real issue is not the Partition of India in 1947. It is the Partition of the BJP in 2009.
August 26

BJP is a party heading towards Suspended Animation. (So many of its leaders are getting agitated and Animated and subsequently Suspended)
August 25

Jinnah yahan, Nehru wahan, Partition ke siwa, chaara bhi kya…
August 25

2005. Advani: Jinnah Jinnah! Jaswant: A friend in need is a friend in deed. 2009. Jaswant: Jinnah Jinnah! Advani: A friend in need is a friend to run away from.
August 25

Agar BJP ek insaan hota, to cheekhta: Mujhe apne aap se bachao!
August 25

India is finally ahead of Australia in both Test and ODI rankings. And yet we are not No. 1.
August 24

Kalyan was Mr UP. He was expelled. Uma was Firebrand No. 1. She was expelled. Govindacharya was the soul of the BJP. He was expelled. After Vajpayee retired, Advani instead of consolidating, got sidelined. In the BJP, it’s not lonely at the Top, the Top is from where you get kicked out.
August 24

BJP’s theme song: Jinnah yahan, marna yahan, iske siwa jaana kahan…
August 24

In IPL 1 the only two teams that had non-Icon captains made it to the finals. In IPL2, two teams which stripped Icons of captaincy made it to the finals. In IPL 3…
August 24

Please observe a two-minute-silence. The Aussie team is finally dead. But do not mock them. They won 3 straight World Cups and dominated Tests like Tyrants for more than a decade. And there will be an upheaval and in a year we will see whether the new team will be stronger or weaker.
August 24

Goodbye Freddie! Thanks for the Test memories! See you in IPL3.
August 24

Ashes to Ashes and Dust to Dust / Like a Phoenix, England rose from the Dust…
August 24

Prince aur saathiyo ki Jai Ho! Saakshaat Krishna lagte hain. And yes, India’s definitely got talent, a wider and richer spectrum than other countries.
August 22

Morning Tea. Morning Newspaper. Morning Facebook Update. That’s where the Real World, the Written Word and the Virtual World all meet… (Or is that going too far???)
August 21

Connecting with long lost friends of 10, 20 and even 30 years ago on a daily basis… that’s the best part I like about Facebook.
August 21

What’s on my mind? Do even I really know?
August 21

Let’s Face it, we are all Booked and addicted for Life, here on FaceBook…
August 21

Indra Nooyi kya kisiki zindagi badlegi? Ya to logo ko kam Pepsi pilayegi ya zyaada. She’s at No. 3. Sonia has rebuilt the Cong party given stability and has influence on policies that affect hundreds of millions of people. She’s at No. 13. These lists are utter rubbish.
August 21

Why are all flashbacks in movies shown in Black & White? In the olden days, was everyone colour blind?
August 21

Inside News: Jaswant wanted to retire and become a writer. The party by banning the book and expelling him, gave him a “controversial and flying start” to his career. Nothing sells like controversy.
August 21

At the virtual entrance of Facebook is the message: Abandon hope all ye who enter here…
August 19

Henceforth, the term will be: An Usain of lightning
August 18

Ekta is planning to revive her career with the following new serials: Kahani Swine Flu Ki, Kyunki “Swine” Flu bhi kabhi “Human” thi, Kasauiti Swine Flu ki…
August 18

Fanta: Mujhe bahut acchi bimaari hui hain. Banta: Accha? Kaunsi? Fanta: Shahid se pakdi hain. Woh use Fine Flu kahata hain!
August 18

Post-Kaminey, they are coming out with a new line of jokes called Fanta-Banta jokes.
August 18

Fast Food: Always take a combo meal. The burger has processed meat made from useless animal parts and high on preservatives. Fries are high on saturated fat (Cholestrol alert!). And Colas have very high sugar and caffiene. Body ka band bajana hain to acchi tarah se bajao.
August 18

When I see an irritating ad, I have 3 reactions: 1. The dude who made this ad is a retard or 2. This dude should be banned from admaking or 3. This dude should be hanged from the nearest lamp post. Anyone else feels that way? (Sincere apologies to my dear Facebook friends in the ad industry)
August 18

I am very Statusified with Facebook, unlike may other social networking sites.
August 14

If someone writes “Love in the Time of Swine Flu“, it’s sure to be a 2009 bestseller.
August 14

Mr friend’s tip: Invest your money in the stock of companies dealing with swine flu vaccines, face masks and hand sanitizers.
August 14

Once air travel used to be exciting. Now it just spells fear. Flu fear.
August 14

The World is Flut
August 14

Achoo! Swine Flu! Bless you! Why does it all rhyme?
August 13

Tu mera, tu mera, tu mera, tu mera… tu mera Hero H1N1
August 13

Right now, up there, is a pig’s soul looking down in wonder and amusement at the global furore it has created. Maybe it’s exchanging notes with a monkey and a bird.
August 13

Fact: Even the mosquito can catch the flu. Conjecture: Will we have Mosquito Flu one day? Question: Does the mosquito sneeze when it catches the flu?
August 13

Hey! Let’s all collect our FB Status messages and come out with a Great Big Fat Bestselling PJBook!
August 12

Will Nadal’s knees withstand the onslaught of a Fully Filled, Fulfilled and Fed Federer?
August 12

Early privatization and liberalization of Swine Flu testing and treatment would have prevented the current epidemic. Ye Government disease pe bhi monopoly chahata hain!
August 12

If you want long leave from office: Pretend to be short of breath, hold your chest, look dizzy and confused, keep coughing and tell everyone you feel nauseous, all the while refusing to take leave.
August 12

Federer and Saina don’t get death threats. SL cricketers faced terrorists in an attack that could have been meant for the Indian team. If the Indian cricketers get jittery giving their location to WADA 365 days a year, then atleast they have a right to do so. We are all paranoid to some extent.
August 10

Heard: Kasab is going to act in a Bollywood movie… It will be titled Kabhi Ha, Kabhi Na
August 10

Fact of the day: Tiruvalluvar lived more than 2000 years ago, at a time when there was no Karnataka, No Tamil Nadu and not even the idea of India.
August 10

Even the boy/girl who comes last in Sa Re Ga Ma Li’l Champs, hats off to him/her.
August 8

Great pavements are coming up in India. But they are mainly used for hawkers, garbage, as toilets and for dog poop. Government apathy–>Citizen action. Government action–>Citizen apathy.
August 8

Coming soon after IPL & KPL: Bangalore Premier League, Banashankari Premier League, 7th Stage Premier League, 3rd Cross Premier League…
August 7

How do you do? No flu thank you
August 7

Seems I missed the 12.34.56 7-8-9 today. Not to worry, I’m soon going to catch the 12.3456789 seconds in the next minute.
August 7

Dum dum digga digga, sab kuch digga digga, road repair digga digga, phone cables digga digga, storm water drains digga digga, Metro Rail digga digga, main to gira, main to gira hai…. (Almost fell into a digging zone today. Ye furious digging kab tak chalega???)
August 6

Khubh jamega rang jab char yaar milenge computer, internet connection aur Facebook ke sang.
August 5

Coming Soon: Rakhi ki Shaadi. Rakhi ka Honeymoon. Kyuni Ab Rakhi ki Saas Bhi Hain… I’m sure the creative team of NDTV Imagine is working overtime. (Picture abhi baaki hain mere dost)
August 5

Does Happy Rakhi mean Happy Festival or a Happy Sawant?
August 5

The stock market is not all Bull. Learn to grin and Bear it.
August 4

Why is the stock market so sensitive, sentimental and touchy about everything?
August 4

Dhanda hain bhai dhanda hain. Thanda hain bhai sab thanda hain. (Arthath: Thanda matlab Dhanda)
August 4

For the next couple of years, RoI will be referred to as Recession on Investment.
August 4

WADA is all this happening in cricket nowadays?
August 4

The latest Reliance controversy is a load of gas…
August 3

There is no harm in eating your words. They are not fattening and they don’t give you indigestion.
August 3

Rakhi ka Swayamwar: Ek ko mala pahanayi, 15 ko rakhi aur millions of viewers ko topi
August 3

People say the stock exchange is on a Roll. Par Roll nahin hain, Roller Coaster hain. Neeche bhi speed se hi jaata hain.
August 1

© Sunil Rajguru

People say the stock exchange is on a Roll. Par Roll nahin hain, Roller Coaster hain. Neeche bhi speed se hi jaata hain.
July 31

Fact of the day: Cocoa brings down cholestrol. Other ingredients of chocolate bring it up. Net effect=Zero. Advice of the day: Roz chocolate khao aur mast raho.
July 31

The law of diminishing returns: Magnum Opus. Novel. Novella. Short Story. Newspaper article. FB Status Message. (But they’re all forms of literature)
July 31

Cauvery to “Ganga of the South” hain na? To dhanya ho: Hum Bangaloreans roz Ganga Jal peete hain.
July 31

News. Something that hits the Internet in seconds, the TV channels in minutes and the newspapers after a day.
July 31

SRK ke itne bure din aa gaye hain kya, ki woh Arindam Chaudhuri ka quizmaster ban baitha hain, aur woh bhi teen saal ke liye?
July 30

Learnt the hard way today: In Bangalore, the more numerically precise an address is (e.g. 1st cross, 1st main, 1st phase, 1st stage) the more difficult it is to find and get directions.
July 30

MS and Yahoo are two totally different animals. Will they complement each other or cancel out each other? Will it be 2+2=4 or 2-2=0 (Keeping in mind that Google is 5+)
July 30

The new realities are BRIC, Indo-China and Af-Pak. Aur ye kya hain Manmohan sahab, aap abhi tak Indo-Pak ke daldal main phase hue hain?
July 30

Digging digging everywhere and not a place to walk…
July 30

Advani: From PM-in-Waiting to Waiting-for-Nothing. Modi: From “Usko PM banao” to “Uska Narco Test karao”… BJP kab tak slide karta rahega?
July 30

After seeing the Kashmir squabble, the region feels very much part of the Indian Parliamentary system.
July 30

We learn of the concept of Death and its inevitability as children. We all know we will die one day. Millions of people die every day. And yet when we come face to face with even one Death, it totally Devastates us.
July 25

My life is so F********d! (I wanted to say that My life is so Facebooked, but that wouldn’t have the same effect, would it?)
July 25

In politics women are better than men. Rajiv had to be a PM to run the nation. Sonia is doing it without that post. If Mulayam is King of goondas, Maya is Empress. If Buddha is Left, Mamta is Left Ultra. If Karuna is dictatorial, what do you make of Jaya?
July 24

Kasab pleads not guilty and they cry foul. Kasab pleads guilty and they cry foul.
July 23

“My life is an open book” has much more meaning with FB status updates
July 22

“We did not concede any ground to Pak on terror” Mr Foreign Secy, if you have no ground in the first place, there is no chance of conceding it!
July 22

“Son, whatever goes up, must come down”… “But Papa, that doesn’t hold true in space, right?” Sigh! Today’s kids: Try telling them anything at your own risk.
July 22

Suspend Continental’s license. Kick the employees who frisked Kalam out of our airports. Do we have no pride or what?
July 22

Did you hear about India’s Total Political Eclipse? It started on August 15, 1947 and continues to this very day
July 22

Schools were invented not to educate children, but to give free time to parents and keep them away from insanity.
July 21

Manmohan will find himself very cold and lonely on his stand on climate change and warming up to Pak
July 21

is going to start cheering for Aus soon. They seem the perennial underdogs now.
July 21

Test cricket isn’t getting extinct. Test cricketers are
July 20

Kambli blasts Sachin. Kambli clarifies. Kambli backtracks. Kambli patches up with Sachin. All this before the programme is even aired! Stock Market speculation is out. It’s TV speculation all the way.
July 20

BJP vanquished. Mulayam fading. In UP it’s just Sonia aur Maya. Will we have a statue-breaking poll in 2012?
July 17

A friend points out to me that while other cities have their Skylines, Bangalore will always have its Treeline. Thank God for that!
July 17

A man should just work from sunrise to sunset and do nothing else. A man should just rest from sunset to sunrise and do nothing else.
July 17

Coming Soon! Gay Yoga by Baba Ramdev
July 11

Rakhi Swayamwar theek hain. But after that, will it be a real marriage and will it really last? Or will we have another reality show: Rakhi ka war swayam chala gaya… Greater TRP ratings!!!
July 10

Dear Manmohan, Calling up Tata or seeking a Global Advisory Council won’t solve Air India’s problems. Uska kuch nahin ho sakta. That’s one PSU you’ll have to sell lock, stock and barrel. (That’ll help the fiscal defecit too to a bit)
July 10

Why are they using words like ‘Lover’ and ‘Suitor’ in the Sania stalking cases. Plain Stalker is enough. No need to find synonyms for words like Criminal, Convict, Murderer just for the sake of variety in headlines.
July 10

Whenever it rains heavily in Bangalore, trees fall. Considering it rains from April to November, I wonder how Bangalore is still so green!
July 10

Abhi hum Beta nahin hain hain bhai, abhi hum aapke Baap ban-ne wale hain (Google)
July 9

Pak: OK, we trained the terrorists, we accept it, what are you going to do? India: Hum bahut khush hain. Aapne kabul kiya, yahi hamare liye bahut hain. Safal hui hamari aradhana.
July 9

Aayega, aayega, aayega ek din 3G aayega…
July 8

Yippeee!!! US-Russia to have just 3000 nuclear warheads! Now I can sleep in peace. (As it is more space is required in the Nuclear Cabinet for Pak, NKorea, Iran… (and of course India, China) Nuclear Democracy is great, isn’t it???
July 7

Pahale Murli, phir Mendis, ab ye Herath kaun hain? The Spin God is shifting next door to the island or what?
July 7

The Indian cricket team has just won 5 ODI series in a row. Pathetic performance! Start panicking! Bring out all the guys from retirement!
July 7

Bubble Bubble Market Trouble!
July 6

If you’re not a Fed fan, then 2003-09 is actually the most boring period in Men’s tennis. Nothing beats the Lendl-Becker-McEnroe-Connors-Wilander-Edberg rivalry of the 1980s. We even had a lot of 1-time winners like Cash, Noah and Chang. There was glorious uncertainty. Then it was: Who will win??? Now it is: Will Fed win???
July 6

Great Expectations! Pranab Babu koi Santa Claus hain kya?
July 6

In school, never thought Borg would be bettered. A mere 3-4 years back, never thought Sampras would be bettered. Impossible is Nothing. Grand Fed has made every other Great an Ex-
July 6

Dhoni has led ODI series wins against Pak, Eng, SL, NZ and WI. He beat Aus 2-0 in a triangular final. Ab SA aur WC baaki hain. Best of Luck dude!
July 6

The Rule of Two. Bangalore has two seasons: Wet and Dry. Delhi has two seasons: Wish it was Cold and Wish it was Hot. Chennai has two seasons: Hot and Humid and Very Hot and Humid. India has two seasons: When there’s Monsoon and When there isn’t a Monsoon
July 5

OK Mamata is Partisan and Populist and Political. But I like her efforts at complexes, shops, hotels, water, toilets, onboard infotainment… that will change my user experience greatly and not great looking grand schemes that can be presented at IIM seminars.
July 4

Whenever Dhoni looks tired, the BCCI should rest him, that’s the only way Team India will remain fresh
July 4

Laga ungli pe abhi bhi (halka) daag… Ye kaunsa poll dye use karte hain? Die hi nahin hota.
July 4

They want to ban cow slaughter. But man slaughter is fine if it suits their political objectives.
July 3

India and Pak want to Talk too much. They should just avoid each other and listen to the Sounds of Silence for a decade or so. The Wall will come down when it has to…
July 3

My son’s first self-made PJ. What is the opposite of Rajeswarinagar? — Rajesh Don’t Worry Nagar!
July 3

Cricket PJ of the day: What is the biography of a chucker called? The Man Who Threw Too Much
July 3

Star Plus is bruised Black and Blue, is Green with envy and Red with rage. Basically, it is seeing Colors
July 2

Thousands of years hence, when mankind will cease to exist, aliens will go through our ruins and find hundreds of statues of Maya. They will conclude that she was the greatest human to walk the Earth. And you think she has no foresight!
July 2

Stand straight n upright and keep to the centre in these troubled political times. Leaning excessively to the Left or Right may severely erode your votebank.
July 2

Will they be able to apply the Statue of Limitations on Maya?
July 2

Not So Vicious Circle: 1 IPL = Just 1 extra ad endorsement for top cricketers. Miss IPL = Be fresh for major tournaments = More victories = More endorsements = No need for IPL = …
July 1

Cricket is a game where 11 fools play and 1100 fools watch (GB Shaw) Today I think it’s more like 1100 lakh fools watch and I am proud to be one of them, so my cricket related statuses will continue, kindly adjust…
July 1

15,000 cops for VIP security in Delhi. Never knew VIP stood for Very Insecure Person
June 30

Mousavi: I ran for President and I lost, unfairly. Ahmadinejad: I ran and I won, fairly! Bottomline: Iran lost
June 30

monsoon comesoon
June 30

Strange attractors: Drugs and popstars
June 30

It is the duty of any government to come out with many statutes to counter changing political realities. I think Maya read that as statues.
June 29

Buddha’s 8-fold path: Fight 1. Lalgarh violence 2. Statewide Naxals 3. Mamata 4. Centre 5. Karat 6. Anti-incumbency 7. Singur fallout 8. Low party morale –> all at once
June 24

Federer’s theme song: “I want to break free…” (from Sampras) (He’s already broken free of the Nadal jinx)
June 23

For those still mourning cricket, har saal ek wish karo… 2009: ICC Champions Trophy, 2010: T20 WC, 2011: ODI WC, 2012: T20 WC…
June 23

Will Formula 1 become two?
June 23

My friend’s recession mantra: Less pay, less targets, less budget, less resources. But more pressure, more meetings, more ideas, more hard work. And Tension? Well “More” or “Less” is totally in your hands.
June 22

Will South Africa ever win a World Cup in their lives?
June 19

And reporting live from Iran is… er… Twitter! A social networking site as a window to reality? Web 3.0?
18 June

2008: Dada sacked. 2009: Buchanan sacked. 2010: SRK sacked. 2011: KKR sacked. 2012: IPL sacked (Coz by then there will be 16 teams, 3 IPLs a year and all the players will suffer a permanent nervous breakdown due to Fatigue)
18 June

Manmohan sahab ne Bharat ki Man ki baat Zara deri se batayi Pakistan ko…
17 June

Sigh! No more Royal Daredevilry in England. The Indian Knight Riders Charge has been brought down. From Superkings, we are mere Challengers for 2011.
16 June

Bravo India, you are at the Side and Bottom of cricket. From here, there is only one way and that’s up…
16 June

R.I.P. India T20 World Champs. Nice feeling while it lasted. Till 2011, when there are two World Cups. Hope we can get one atleast
15 June

When you watch TV, it’s joy and bliss. When anyone else watches, it’s a Royal Headache.
June 14

The more Pak terror rises, the more funds it gets, which further fuels terror, which gets more funds… And only India gets rammed. In this aspect atleast Obama=Bush. So much for change!
June 13

In India, 5 million children die of malnutrition a year. 5 million are HIV+. 3 lakh die of TB. Swine Flu deaths: Zero. And yet Swine Flu is the only disease that gets maximum airtime in the TV channels. Interesting. Very interesting.
June 13

So the media was right after all. There’s a rift between Dhoni and Sehwag. And it’s going to be a 6700km wide one soon.
June 9

Australia’s T20 status will now be referred to as the Ashes.
June 9

$1.35 million for 1 month+1 week’s play. I can see Symonds’ point of view of not wanting to play for Aus. IPL is a fab Retirement Home for Aussie Cricketers
June 5

Makes us realize how small we are. And how big this world is. 200+ air passengers can vanish without a trace along with the whole plane…
June 5

Every country gets the news channels it deserves.
June 5

If only the BCCI took off their 2020 Blinkers, then maybe they’d get some 2020 Vision.
June 5

Does anyone remember the Tiananmen men? (And to think, in Chinese, Tianenmen means “Gate of Heavenly Peace”)
June 5

I wonder why the Rain Gods of Bangalore get to work mainly in the post-lunch session.
June 4

Wisdom of the Son: You have such a nice office. It only gives. It gives you work. It gives you money.
June 2

Required for total peace in my house: 3 TVs, 3 Sat TV connections, 3 desktops, 3 laptops, 3 broadband connections, 3 soundproof headphones much better than the current Bose ones. I’m serious!
June 1

Australia is fast becoming the Down Under Civilization and if it doesn’t get its act together, its Globalization Act will go Down Under
June 1
© Sunil Rajguru