Kejri Delhi dubaayega musings…

AAP should change name to BAAP.
So many AAP leaders/MLAs out on bail.
Bail Aam Aadmi Party.
They also think that they are everyone’s baap.
(Delhi will also need a bail-out with the way they are governing)

Piyush Goyal: Mere paas reforms hai, high productivity hai, rural electrification hai, solar augmentation hai, wind power hai. Tere paas kya hai?
Kejri: Mere paas danda hai!

Delhi ke bagal main UP ke bagal main Bihar ke bagal main WB.
Chaar Mukhya Mantri.
Chaar Modi Haters.
Chaar governance debacles.
Chaara Ghotala Guru.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The Kejri nautanki continues unabated…

Priceless logic!
I will hire a corrupt official.
If that corruption is investigated, I will call the PM a psychopath and call his FM corrupt.

Accept unconditionally that Kejri is a dishonest power hungry man who used the anti-corruption plank to grab power and everything makes sense.

2012: Alternative to aam parties.
2013: Alternative to Sheila.
2014: Alternative to Modi.
2015: Alternative to Mogambo.
‪#‎CowardKejriwal‬

#‎CowardKejriwal‬ attacks the honest, hugs a convict, aligns with the corruptest party, selects MLAs who’ve been arrested and FIRed.

The support that Delhi’s Glorified Mayor and Crown Prince of the Failed Party get is simply mind-blowing.
‪#‎LetParliamentWork‬ ‪#‎CowardKejriwal‬

Before hiring someone, Kejri should have checked his background: Anna.
Arre baba had you checked Kejri’s background before hiring him, ye din nahin aate!

Anna Hazare ranted against bad political parties so much but ended up adding one more to the system.
‪#‎AAP‬

AAP makes its 123456th baseless allegation and will not follow it up because TV channels will give them great coverage.
‪#‎HitAndRun‬ ‪#‎AAPNautanki‬

Na khaoonga, na khaane doonga.
—Modi.
Na kaam karoonga, na kaam karne doonga.
—Congressman.
Na corruption hataunga, na hataane doonga.
—Sri Sri Yugpurush.

AAP.
Margdarshak Mandal from outside: YoYa, PrBh.
Virtual Chief Minister: Manish Sisodia.
Chief Activist and film critic: Sri Sri Yugpurush.

Sonia, Jaitley and Kejri are all darlings of the media.
If they all start fighting with each other then system overload ho jaayega.

At this rate Anna Hazare will launch August Kranti 2016 against Arvind Kejriwal.
Kiran Bedi could be the only consistent factor.

After August Kranti agitation…
Anna: Ye desh ke saath dhokhaghadi hua hai!
After ‪#‎CowardKejriwal‬’s latest theatrics…
Desh: Ye to hamaare saath dhokhaghadi hua hai!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

#IfCBIRaids #CowardKejriwal…

Kejriji should be appointed the JAGPal of India.
Judge Advocate General and Lokpal.

They unleashed every investigative agency against Modi for a decade.
Now when Haters are merely “summoned” or “probed” they start crying!

Anonymous troll talks nonsense.
—Modi is responsible!
Delhi Chief Minister abuses.
—Ye bechaara kaam ka maara, ise chahiye hamara sahara.

All those accusing Modi of being a criminal are suddenly getting chargesheeted, summoned or arrested left, right and centre.
P.S. Evidence is solid, to vendetta rone se koi faayada nahin.

Hug Lalu.
Quiet on National Herald.
Anger on anti-corruption raids.
What is this now…
India For Corruption?

Sonia—Me Supreme Leader.
Kejri—Me Supreme Leader.
Sonia—Can’t summon me.
Kejri—Can’t raid me.
Sonia—Me super clean.
Kejri—Me hyper clean.

Some Congress haters will back Modi.
Some Modi haters will back Congress.
All (Modi + Congress) haters will always back Kejri.
Uska life set hai.

Kejri’s new ‪#‎OddEvenFormula‬
He’ll attack Modi on odd days and attack Modi and even days.
‪#‎AdarshLiberals‬ + Congress: LOL! We’ve been doing that since 2002!

If there was no Modi then maybe Prime Minister Pappu and Leader of Opposition Kejri would have been shouting and supporters clashing 24X7.

Kejri did power meter cutting drama, became CM.
Did dharna drama, got 67/70 seats.
I’m sure this Twitter drama will get him something.

When a Nehru-Gandhi Dynast is born, he comes with a stamp “Future Prime Minister”.
Kejri was born with the stamp “Mr Clean For Life”.

How it actually is…
2011—Every politician is corrupt.
2012—Whatever I say is always true.
2015—I am a politician.
‪#‎Kejri‬

How Kejri wants it…
CBI—Sirji main aapko raid karne aau?
Accused—Nahin main busy hu, agle mahine aana.
CBI—OK sir, sorry to disturb you.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Paanch Saal Kejriwal musings…

AAP’s internal survey says that Arvind Kejriwal is already Chief Minister of New Delhi, though he may resign again on February 10.

Key to opinion polls…
Overestimate BJP and Modi bashing begins after results.
Underestimate BJP and Modi bashing done before results.
Either way Modi haters win.

Mr Natwarlal was released in 1979 and had a good run.
Mr Kejriwal was released in 2013 and is still running in 2015.

Delhi Assembly elections spoilt for choice…
Vote for…
a) A weak Delhi BJP.
b) A non-existent Congress.
c) A joke called AAP.
d) An impotent NOTA button.

Changing one at a time…
2011: India Against Corruption.
2013: Politics Against Corruption.
2015: Politics For Corruption.
‪#‎AAPFundingScam‬

Old Lakhan…
Dus ko main dus lakh karke dikhaa du…
New Lakhan…
Paanch ko main paanch million karke dikhaa du…

Years back an aam aadmi saw Laloo, Mulayam, Maya, Mamata, BSY etc and said…
Even I can emulate them!
And emulate them he did.
‪#‎PaanchSaalNautanki‬

Guess who?
My words are not worth even 0.5 aana.
Beggar gave me 5 Rupees.
I lasted (almost) 50 days.
My party may last 500 days.
Every day I lose 5000 supporters.
Anna gave me 5 lakh followers.
Crooks gave me 50 lakh Rupees.

Kejri’s Believe It Or Not!
Someone who worked in the Indian Revenue Service and campaigned nationally against black money is pretending that he is clueless about black money reaching the accounts he manages.

Even the Congress comes with a 5-year guarantee card.
The AAP one is valid for 49 days.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The strange tale of Politician Kejriwal Grundy…

Politician Kejriwal Grundy,

Born on a Monday,

Launched party on Tuesday,

Became CM on Wednesday,

Declared future PM on Thursday,

Lost his CMship on Friday,

Lost his PMship dreams on Saturday,

His politics took ill, grew worse, died and buried on Sunday.

That was the end,

Of Politician Kejriwal Grundy.

This version by Sunil Rajguru

AAP and the 420 factor…

In 1984, the Congress won a record 414 Lok Sabha seats.
In 2014, the Congress lost 418 seats.
But the AAP broke that record by losing 420 seats, a highly symbolic number.

AAP doesn’t respect other parties.
Doesn’t respect law and order.
Doesn’t respect courts.
Doesn’t respect anything at all.
Result…
Nobody respects the AAP, especially the voters.

AAP is curing Indian politics using Homeopathy: Like cures like.
They will cure bad parties by becoming as bad as them.

© Sunil Rajguru