“12 years a slave” to absolute hatred against Modi.
2002-14.
The Modi haters’ slogan…
Doodh maango to kheer denge,
Modi ko support karo to cheer denge.
Believer: Beware! The Day of Judgment is near!
Modi Hater: Yeah, May 16!
1998: I’m backing Vajpayee to keep Advani out.
2013: I’m backing Advani to keep Modi out.
2014: I’m…
Chhodo, chalo, jaane de yaar,
Abki baar Modi sarkaar.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
In an exam paper, Modi got 80/100 and Kejri got 0/100.
Kejri screamed, “Modi failed to get 100 by 20 marks!” a few dozen times.
Media reported: Modi failed by 20 marks.
Pappu couldn’t even give the paper.
Sonia said, “Had he given the paper, he would have got 100/100.”
Media reported: Pappu narrowly misses getting 100/100.
Final headline…
Pappu best candidate. Kejriwal best challenger to Modi.
(And that’s how we are comparing a man with Zero days experience as Chief Minister with a man with 49 days experience as Chief Minister with a man who has 4500+ days experience as Chief Minister)
© Sunil Rajguru
In India, we have two pairs of glasses: Secularism and Communalism.
Depending on which pair you wear, the same thing can look totally different.
Note: The glasses are monopolized by one group only…
Secular X riot = Secular.
Communal X riot = Genocide.
Secular X Hate speech = Freedom of speech.
Communal X Hate speech = Fascism.
Secular X Very strong leader = Statesman.
Communal X Very strong leader = Hitler.
Secular X Journalist = Independent.
Communal X Journalist = Severe bias.
Secular X Gasbag = Intellectual.
Communal X Intellectual = Gasbag.
Secular X Corruption = Clean chit.
Communal X Allegations = Criminal.
Secular X Weak foreign policy = Diplomacy.
Communal X Strong foreign policy = Alarmist.
Secular X Status message = Power of Internet.
Communal X Status message = Section 66A.
Secular X Distorian = Historian.
Communal X Historian = Distorian.
Secular X Politician = Incorruptible.
Communal X Politician = Guilty.
Barack Obama X Revenge by voting = Secular.
Amit Shah X Revenge by voting = Communal.
Narendra Modi X Any good thing = Communal.
Sonia Gandhi X Any bad thing = Secular.
LK Advani X Rath Yatra = Communal.
LK Advani X Anti-Modi = Secular.
Any citizen remotely supporting Modi = Communal.
Any citizen soundly attacking Modi = Secular.
Post script…
India is a sovereign socialist secular democratic republic.
If he wins on May 16, Modi haters will declare India a communal fascist state.
© Sunil Rajguru
The BJP actually released its manifesto way back on September 13, 2013.
It was the shortest one ever and read…
Modi is our PM candidate.
Modi is like Windows.
The moment you take his name in a debate, the debate hangs and gets stuck.
Which is bigger:
Anti-Congress wave or pro-Modi wave?
Which is smaller:
Pro-Congress wave or anti-Modi wave?
Does it exist:
Any non-Modi non-Congress wave?
Modi hater: Do you think India will ever move on from 2002.
Correct question: Will the Modi hater ever move on from 2002?
Answer: No.
No agreement on…
World: Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?
India: Did Modi mastermind Godhra or not?
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Abki baar Modi sarkar,
= Aakhri baar Dynasty ki sarkar.
Why not start campaigning for 2019…
Abki baar Modi sarkar,
Agli baar bhi Modi sarkar.
Ye manifesto kya cheez hai yaar?
Ab ki baar Modi sarkar.
The D4 slogan…
Ek, do, teen, chaar,
Ek, do, teen, chaar,
Chaaro milke saath chale to kar de chamatkar,
Par ye kya hai yaar,
Abki baar Modi sarkar.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Ab ki baar aar ya paar,
Ab ki baar no daraar,
Ab ki baar Delhi is not far,
Pappu PM only in jocular,
Pakki hai Congress ki haar,
Hil gaya Delhi ka durbaar,
Milega use ek naya avatar,
Milenge naye naye shikaar.
Ab ki bar Modi sarkar.
There’s only one charcha in the bazaar,
Only one conversation in every car,
In each and every seminar,
While gulping pizza or idli-sambhaar,
Or even eating caviar,
Only one man is on the radar.
Ab ki bar Modi sarkar.
It’s the ultimate political interwar,
This country has become bipolar,
Desh ke beech main hai deewar,
Par kahe cop, general aur tehesildar,
Bole neta, kisan aur zamindar,
Kahe jawaan, manager aur jamaadar,
Even the student who does ratta maar.
Ab ki bar Modi sarkar.
Detractors kahe ye hain brutal tsar,
Godhra kahe baar baar baar,
Par hai ye bandha superstar,
Yaane ke simply stellular,
BJP ka hai ye lodestar-polestar,
Hai ye Saffron ka renewed waar,
Dega apne opposition ko zabardast maar,
Badlega Bharat ka sansaar,
Ab ki bar Modi sarkar.
This version by Sunil Rajguru