The Kejri suffering continues unabated…

Poor (allegedly economically) Kejri.
Poor (fate-wise) Delhi wallahs.

An internal survey shows that Kejri is god and the whole world worships him.
Since this is not so, it shows that not only EVMs, but the world itself is rigged.

2011…
Kejri: Any minister without corruption charges out there?
2017…
Kapil: I am the only AAP minister without corruption charges!

Full-circle…
2011.
Kejri: All politicians are accepting crores of cash.
2017.
Kapil: I saw Kejri accept crores of cash.

Sisodia: Kejri uncle, aaj Assembly main kya khele?
Kejri: Chalo EVM-EVM khelte hai!
Sisodia: Weeee!!!! Bada maja aaya!

Kejrwal thinks that people are total fools.
Unfortunately with 67/70 seats in his kitty, he has every right to think so.

Double dhamaka!
2013: Entry of AAP will improve politics!
2017: Exit of AAP will improve politics!

Tomorrow AAP to banks…
Hand over your servers-safes for 3 hours and we’ll prove that money is not safe in banks.

Kejri: Leader of Opposition (Modi).
Kapil Mishra: Leader of Opposition (Kejri).

Lalu to Kejri: Ye kya hai nautanki? Hum to paper ballots ko bhi hack karte the ek zamaane main!
#BoothCapturing

Even if paper ballots are handed over for three hours, they can be tampered with.
#EVMNautanki #AAP

So France gets its Kejriwal.
An artificially created inexperienced party that storms the elections.
#Macron

Lalu. Akhilesh. Kejri.
Same to same.
Useless.
English media once really loved all of them.

Kejriwal was like this from Day 1.
AAP was like this from Day 1.
It’s getting difficult to hide it nowadays, that’s all.

Latest AAP reality show…
Tragedy Days With Kapil.

Yugpurush Kejri is such that even if convicted he will remain India’s most honest politician.

Old.
Live life king size.
New.
Live life Kejri size.
(Arthaat, “aam” aadmi gaya tel lene)

In 2013 Kejri said he would remove corruption.
He forgot to add that he would then transfer it all into his home.

Next New Delhi budget will have the following sections…
1. Outstation ads.
2. Anti-defamation fees.
3. DIA (Delhi Investigating agency).
4. Chai-samosas.

Time for someone to publish a book titled…
The 1001 Controversies of Arvind Kejriwal.

Propaganda Minister.
External (out of Delhi) Affairs Minister.
Spymaster. (Feedback Cell)
The Buck Stops at Sisodia.
Anything but Chief Minister of Delhi.
#Kejri

Yesterday…
Do you know, 150+ chargesheeted MPs are in the Lok Sabha!
—Sri Sri Kejri Baba.
At the current rate, tomorrow…
Do you know, there are 150+ chargesheets against the AAP!

The conundrum for April 1.
Is today #AprilFoolDiwas or #PappuDiwas or #KejriDiwas?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

#AgustaWestland musings…

Speculation whenever Sonia leaves India.
Yesterday…
Why is she going? Will we ever know?
Tomorrow…
Will she come back or stay there for good?

1983: Modi passes MA.
2014: Modi become PM.
2016: Sonia’s name comes in ‪#‎AugustaWestland‬.
Within days loyal servant Kejri rakes up 33-year-old issue to divert attention.

Possible yellow journalism headline in 2019 when his Haters run out of even the flimsiest and thinnest of allegations:
Is Modi an alien?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

If AAP wins Delhi musings…

Lord of Lutyens
2013: Fellowship of the AAP.
2014: The Twin Towers of Swearing in and Resignation.
2015: Return of the Kejri.

Every small thing is ‪#‎TestForModi‬.
If he doesn’t fare well its ‪#‎BlowToModi‬
If he does, move on to ‪#‎NextTestForModi‬.
Started in 2002, still running.

If Modi loses, then the Delhi cocktail circuit’s Happy New Year will finally begin on February 10.

Usually governments celebrate after 100 days in power.
This time in the Capital will go wild after 50 days.

After winning the World Cup, looks like a loss to Bangladesh.

Looks like TV news channels finally beat Modi.
(Kejri, Bedi, Shah all being incidental)

What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School—Mark H. McCormack.
What They Don’t Teach You At Kharagpur Engineering School—Arvind Kejriwal.

The fall…
From 2009-14, media backed Sonia, the most powerful woman in India with 200+ Lok Sabha seats, 60+ Rajya Sabha seats and many States.
In 2015, media backed Kejri, a nobody with 4 Lok Sabha seats, 0 Rajya Sabha seats and 0 States.

Parity…
In 15 months BJP wins Lok Sabha plus India’s 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 5th*, 8th, 10th, 16th and 21st largest States (by area).
But if Kejriwal wins the 30th largest State, get ready to be told by media that Modi Wave is dead, Modi has failed referendum, Amit Shah is over, blah blah blah…
*PDP deal pending.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru