Just keep adding the zeroes… (Zeroes are worthless anyway)

1.76 paise: Worth something after Independence, worthless now.

17.6 paise: The price of a solitary sweet in a pack of sweets?

Rs 1.76: About the price of a bubble gum.

Rs 17.6: Enough potato chips to satisfy momentary hunger.

Rs 176: About the price of a ticket in a non-multiplex cinema hall.

Rs 1760: The cost of watching a movie in a multiplex with family.

Rs 17,600: A cheap workable sofa set is possible.

Rs 1,76,000: Enough money to buy a Nano with AC etc.

Rs 17.6 lakhs: That’ll get you a big luxury car in India.

Rs 1.76 crore: An up market flat in a metro.

Rs 17.6 crore: An independent house in a metro.

Rs 176 crore: The annual turnover of a small company.

Rs 1,760 crores: The price of an Airbus A380 with extra modifications.

Rs 17,600 crores: The annual turnover of one of India’s largest companies.

Rs 1.76 lakh crores: Phew! We finally reach the number of the (maha)Raja of Indian telecom! Laloo was small fry, Telgi is non-existent and Harshad Mehta is turning in his grave.

Rs 17.6 lakh crores: The total worth of all the scams in India put together?

Rs 176 lakh crores: Or is this the total worth of all the scams in the history of India put together?

Bhai sahib, bus zero jodte jao, jodte jao, kee pharak painde???

India invented the Zero, didn’t it?

© Sunil Rajguru

Kaun kambakht kahata hain ki education India ka corruption hatayega?

graduation-309661_1280• This LLB and MA (Political Science) got caught in the biggest animal husbandary scam of the decade.

• This BA LLB spends thousands of crores in building meaningless statues and parks.

• This BSc MBA had to resign as chief minister over the Adarsh scam.

• This PhD and double masters had to quit over his links with a cricket team which brought down the whole IPL bandwagon.

• This ex-Indian Air Force Officer and Fergusson College + NDA alumni presided over the biggest Commonwealth Games scam.

• This multiple gold medalist D.Phil and Oxford alumni survived a very shady trust vote in the past and became the first prime minister to be pulled in such a manner by the supreme court over 2G.

This version by Sunil Rajguru

The slightly Good, mostly Bad & downright Ugly side of Commonwealth Games 2010

C for Corruption
India set out to showcase its economic might and development path, but ended up showcasing its corruption instead. All’s Not Well That Merely Ends Well. Countries will remember this for a long long time and CWG 2010 will be a Benchmark for corruption and mismanagement.

O for Opening Ceremony
Funny how a few song, dance and light shows can make everyone forget misappropriation of funds and missed deadlines. Indian Olympic chief Suresh Kalmadi’s moment (even though he was booed) after which the media declared that All’s Well That Begins Well.

M for Mani Shankar Aiyer
The Congress politician, who definitely did not have the last laugh… (Last heard he sacked his Rain Dance Master)

M for Money
How much did the games actually cost? How many funds were siphoned off? How much money could have actually been diverted for actual development?

O for Organizing Committee
Which in retrospect will be called the Disorganizing Committee.

N for Next
Next is what? Olympics? When will India be able to host the Olympics? Or is it N for Never?

W for Witch-hunt
The Central Government constituted a Special Investigation Committee to look into the whole fiasco. The saga continues even after the games end…

E for Environment friendly
In association with the United Nations Environment Programme, they were called the Green Games. However the presence of the games village near the Yamuna bank and the felling of trees had detractors crying foul.

A for Aquatic Pigeon Poo
Swimmers complained of pigeon droppings in swimming pools. Some alleged a Delhi belly because of that. Most Indians didn’t know what all the fuss was about.

L for Lane
The reserved Commonwealth Games Lane created quite a stink before the games began, but was luckily not as bad as that once the games started.

T for Toilets
Foreign media highlighted the stinking dirty toilets before the games began and continued to do so till the end of the games.

H for Hockey
Char din ki chandani, phir andheri raat hai
After reaching the Commonwealth finals for the first time ever, a 0-8 thrashing in the finals.

G for Gold Rush and Gagan Narang
Every cloud has a gold lining. 38 Golds (4 for Narang). Second Place, ahead of England! (Great Britain had 19 Golds in the last Olympics) Only the medals tally will be remembered in the future.

A for AR Rehman
Was the official theme song Jiyo Utho Bado Jeeto that bad? Is AR Rahman in decline? Is he no longer Ram but in fact the Ravan of music?

M for Manmohan Singh
Who had to keep stepping in to save face in the run-up to the games. It is said that once a President was ready to sweep the floor for a Prime Minister. In this case, a Chief Minister taunted the Prime Minister to do the same.

E for Elizabeth II
The Queen missed a Commonwealth Games for the first time in decades. What was she scared of?

S for the Suresh and Sheila Show
Potentially good material for an Indian version of the Punch and Judy Show featuring the games head and Delhi Chief Minister.

This Version By Sunil Rajguru