Tag Archives: congress

Congressi musings of the day…

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· Every middle class Indian would gladly pay Rs 5 each if it would stop them from listening to Manish Tewari.

· After the Food Bill is implemented, the common man’s Petrol Bill, Grocery Bill, Restaurant Bill, You Name it Bill will go through the roof.

· 2014: BJP single largest party, Congress supports Third Front.
2015: Food Bill implementation destroys economy.
2016: Third Front falls, blamed for mess. Congress re-elected.

· Found… Pappu’s last telegram…
Telegram kaun laya?

· Actually the Cash Transfer Scheme started ages ago.
The only difference is it first covered politicians and Swiss banks and now it covers citizens and Indian banks.

· Aaj Congress ka zabardast speeches/Tweets/attacks dekh ke lag raha hai ki sab partymen raat bhar laaltein leke Modi ke speeches pad rahe the.

· Why is he always in that mode?
manish teWARi

· Nero played the fiddle when Rome burned.
(Nero= MMS. Rome=India)

· What is the Dynasty Model? What is the Maya Model? What is the Mamata Model? What is the Mulayam Model? What is the Diggy Raja Model? What is the DMK Model? What is the MSM Model? ‪#‎GujaratModel‬

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Pappu and other Congressi musings…

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· Gali gali main shor hai,
Rahul Gandhi bore hai.
‪#‎PappuSpeeches‬

· If Rahul Gandhi finally and reluctantly becomes Prime Minister, will they call it Uninterested Pappu Alliance?

· UPA kyun haar ke CAGaar par khadi hai?

· The Congress can drastically speed up Internet services in India by merely blocking all pages that have the word Modi in them.

· Why is that party always Maken a fool of itself?

· 1993—SRK: K… K… K… K… Kiran.
Bees saal baad…
Congress: M… M… M… M… Modi.

· The Government of India are great fans of MIB.
No it’s not Will Smith, but Mis Information Bureau.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The rulers of India…

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· Liberalization Economy Trinity…
Narasimha Rao the Creator.
Vajpayee the Preserver.
Manmohan the Destroyer.

· Spiderman: With great power comes great responsibility.
Sonia: LOL! With absolute power come zero accountability and zero responsibility.
MMS: Power? Woh kya hota hai? Pata nahin? Theek hai!

· The Information Overload in the Modi-Godhra case is absolutely astounding.
So much so that facts have become irrelevant and it’s now just a matter of belief!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Today’s partisan political musings…

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· Presumption of Innocence: The principle that one is considered innocent until proven guilty.
Presumption of Guilt: The principle that Modi is considered guilty until proven innocent.

· In the BJP, they had to coin the term “Namonia”.
In the Congress it already exists and it’s called So”nia”.

· Sir!!! Please be PM! Please be PM! Please be PM! Please be PM!…
‪#‎Pappu‬: Mujhe chhod do mere haal pe, zinda hoon yaar kaafi hai…
‪#‎Lootera‬

· Congress spokespersons’ logo…
Trolling India before the Internet was invented!

· Spokesperson’s XI…
Mani, Diggy, Tiwari, Jha, Renuka, Singhvi, Sibal, Tehseen, Khurshid, Nirupam, Narayanaswamy.
Congress all down before 2014 polls!

· Why does the Congress disbelieve that the BJP has so much support?
Today even if RJD was the main Opposition, there’d be a massive “Laloo for PM” lobby, so spectacularly has the UPA tanked.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Sonia + Congressi musings…

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∙ Go figure…
This is the most corrupt and arrogant government in the history of India.
<And>Sonia is the most powerful person in the country.
<But>Sonia is 0% responsible for this arrogance and corruption.

∙ Harry Potter universe…
He who must not be named.
Indian politics universe…
She who must not be named.

∙ Neighbourhood Aunty: Baby khud doodh nahin pee paayega, hame pilaana padega.
Sheila Aunty: Rahul khud PM nahin banega, hame banana padega.

∙ Whenever a tragedy strikes the Congress, there’s always a major revelation against a major opponent.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Marji hai aapki, aakhir vote hai aapka…

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Confident leader: I will sweep the nation.
Congress leader: I will sweep the floor for Sonia.

Dedicated leader: I will serve the nation.
Congress leader: I will serve the dynasty.

Assuring leader: My party will save the nation.
Congress leader: A 43-year-old with zero governance experience will save the nation.

Ancient Congress PM: Jai Jawan, Jai Kisan.
Modern Congress PM: Theek Hai! (Also refer above)

Sane leader: Our soldiers are ready to die for the country.
Insane Congress leader: Our party soldiers are ready to die for the dynasty.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru