Congressi logic.
All of India’s problems due to…
1947-79: RSS.
1980-2001: BJP.
2002-now: Modi.
Congress, 2010-now.
Diarrhea of scams.
Constipation of convictions.
Poverty is a state of mind.
Bengaluru is a State in Pappu’s mind.
I wonder the state of mind of Pappu’s supporters.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Think it over…
In 2009, almost two-thirds of India did not vote for anyone at all either because they were ineligible or because they simply didn’t want to.
Out of those who voted, a whopping 71% Indians did NOT vote for the Congress.
Despite that the Congress got a near-dictatorial run for 5 years where their arrogance has reached unprecedented levels and virtually nobody has been held accountable for the myriad scams.
In contrast, Hitler’s party in 1933 got 44% votes in an election which saw a turnout of 71% of Germany.
A far greater fraction of Germans wanted Hitler to rule in 1933 than Congress in 2009.
On top of that Manmohan Singh has never ever won a seat in a gram panchayat, council, Assembly or general election in his entire life.
He lost the only Lok Sabha seat he tried for in New Delhi in 1999.
And yet he has been the undisputed Prime Minister of India for close to 10 years!
© Sunil Rajguru
Anti-Modi: Modi is a Fascist.
–>Pro-Modi: I am a Modi supporter and I am not a Fascist.
When Modi becomes PM, I’m emigrating.
–>If Modi doesn’t become PM, I’m emigrating.
The M in Modi stands for Murder.
–>The d in Modi stands for development.
Never forget Godhra.
–>They will never let you forget Godhra.
The Gujarat Model will fail in India.
–>Only the Gujarat Model can save India.
If Modi fails in 2014, then he’s finished.
–>If Modi fails in 2014, then India is finished.
What about 2002?
–>What about 1969, 1980, 1983, 1984 and 1989?
Don’t vote for Feku!
–>Can you really vote for Pappu? LOL!
© Sunil Rajguru
Money & Its worthlessness.
Income & Expenditure.
Time saving techniques & Time wasting tasks.
Stress busters & Stress makers.
Progress & Regressive tendencies.
Social networking & Loneliness.
Food Production & Hunger.
They are all going up together and everything is the same in the end.
© Sunil Rajguru
You know…
…a Test match is going on…
…when purists are shouting “Test cricket is not dead!”… “Test cricket is not dead!”…
…an ODI match is going on…
…when people in the office are glued to the computer screen and are alternately looking depressed or screaming.
…a T20 match is going on…
…when you get stuck in a traffic jam on your way back from work and you end up missing the entire match due to that.
…the IPL is going on…
…when there’s a sudden spurt in controversies, inane sports ads and there’s more tamasha than actual cricket going on.
…a First Class match is going on…
…actually you never know about it even though there’s some match going on throughout the year all.
…the Women’s Cricket World Cup is going on…
…when a host of experts across all news channels are bemoaning low viewership of women’s cricket.
© Sunil Rajguru
1. Every price rise, inflationary trend, national tragedy… would be prefixed with “In a blow to Modi…”
2. Every Government scheme would be prefixed with “Sonia unhappy as…” or “Advani disappointed as…” or Rahul angry as…”.
3. Some would be tempted to call him “Alleged Prime Minister”.
4. The media would announce that they are no longer government stooges but “proudly anti-establishment”.
5. The Ministry of External Affairs would hold Passport/Visa Help camps all over the country to help all those people who threatened to quit the country if Modi became PM.
6. The Modi Industry would seek FDI to keep afloat.
7. MPs would petition the Nobel Committee to revoke Barack Obama’s Peace Prize if he invited Modi to the US.
8. Critics would start counting the years in terms of AG (After Godhra).
For example…
Modi became PM of India in 12 AG.
9. His supporters would start calling him Mahatma Modi.
(Jab critics bina wajah ke use gira sakte ho, to fans bina wajah usko chadayenge kyun nahin?)
10. Alternatively, such scenarios could be also become common…
Anchor: And in a blow to Modi…
(Aide whispers into anchor’s ear: Sir no more Bharat Nirman ads. All Congress funding has dried up.
Anchor: Do you think BJP will do the same and oblige us?
Aide: Why not try it out?)
Anchor: And in a blow to Sonia…
© Sunil Rajguru