Delhi has been destroyed 7 times and rebuilt 7 times.
By the time Kejri is finished with it in 2020, it will have to be rebuilt for the 8th time.

Delhiite 1: Aaj Delhi ki acchi VAT lagi hai.
Delhiite 2: Arre Delhi ki to kabse acchi vaat lagi hui hai!

AAP = Anti Anti Party.
Their sole identity is in opposition to others (mainly Modi) and they really stand for nothing.

Kejri has many more ACs than he has honest MLAs.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

…a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
‪#‎NewsHour

Currently Arnab is probably investigating Vasundhara’s nursery school records.
‪#‎ArnabGate‬

Much Ado About Nothing.
Starring: Arvind Kejriwal.
Sequel 1: Priyanka Vadra.
Sequel 2: Lalit Modi.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

When she came, Congress workers tried to popularize the following jingle…
Sonia nahi ye aandhi hai,
Doosri Indira Gandhi hai!

That to some extent is true…

Both asked the mainstream media to bend and instead they crawled.

One did Emergency and the other did e-mergency (Section 66A).

Both pushed their Pappu sons real hard (Sanjay and Rahul respectively).

Indira ruled the Congress for 18 years. Sonia will complete 18 years in 2016 when she will probably retire and hand over the reins to her Pappu.

Indira crashed her party to its lowest ever performance in 1977—153 seats.
Sonia crashed her party to its lowest ever performance in 1999—114 seats.
(Sonia broke the record again in 2014—44 seats).

Only sycophants ruled in both the courts of Indira and Sonia.

Years in the wilderness hardened both of them.

But in terms of concrete development in the end…
Sonia hai aur Gandhi hai,
Par chai ke pyaale main aandhi hai.

© Sunil Rajguru

Most polluted: Air. Drinking water. Vegetable/fruit field soil. Street food.
Most outrage: Colas. Mineral water. Maggi noodles.

An alien monitoring Indian TV news channels would conclude that 1+ billion Indians eats Maggi noodles 3 times a day.

It’s called 2-minute noodles because every bulletin on every news channel has made it mandatory to cover Maggi for at least 2 minutes.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Congress does something bad.
—Silence.
Congress misdeeds confirmed.
—Silence.
Social media goes batshit crazy over Congress misdeeds.
—Reluctantly starts coverage.

Rumour of BJP doing something bad.
—Goes batshit crazy.
When rumour turns out to be wrong.
—Silence.

Rumour of Modi doing something bad.
—Spppaaarta!!!! X 10.
When rumour turns out to be wrong.
—Desperately searches for new lie to continue Sparta-ing.

© Sunil Rajguru

Blame It on the Nephew—Suresh Raina.

Blame It on the Driver—Sallu Bhai.

Blame It on the Friend—Kambli.
(Sequel: How I Fired My Friend which itself was a sequel to How I Fired My Friend by Sachin Tendulkar)

Blame It on MMS—Sonia.

Blame It on Sonia —MMS.

Blame It on Congress leaders—Pappu.

Blame It on Pappu—Congress leaders.

Finally the biggest blockbuster of them all…

Blame It on Modi with sequels from 1 to infinity by Opposition leaders, media, the civil society, activists…

These versions by Sunil Rajguru