Daily Archives: May 29, 2017

The tragedy that is Lalu…

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#JungleRaj returned to Bihar on November 8, 2015.
The media merely brought this to notice in a big way on May 6, 2017.
#BiharKaCMShahabuddin

Nitish rules himself out as Prime Minister.
By the time Lalu is done with him, Nitish will rule himself out as Chief Minister too.

Lalu was voted to power in 1990, 1995, 2000 & 2015.
His family may be voted many times in the future.
Gone case. Kucch nahin ho sakta.

Lalu.
Arrested in 1997.
Convicted in 2013.
Still having a jolly good time in 2017.
Still immensely respected by many.

Lalu proved to be India’s worst politician the year he took over in 1990.
Since then he grew worse every year but adored more every year by #AdarshLiberals.

Lalu ke chele chaara khaate hai.
Choohe daaru peete hai.
#AdarshLiberals mewa khaate hai.
Aam janta galat vote ke silsile main gam khaate hai roz.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The EVM controversy rages on…

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The entire EVM controversy, arguments and proofs can be summed up in six words…
We lost.
EVMs can be hacked.

How do we beat Modi?
Opposition: We can’t, so let’s rake one useless issue after another, pray and hope for the best.
#EVMs

2004—Congress won when BJP was in charge.
2014—BJP won when Congress was in charge.
2015—BJP lost Delhi/Bihar.
2017—Largest party in 2/5 States.
#EVMs

EVMs first used in State elections in 1998.
Almost Bees Saal Baad suddenly saare parties jaag gaye.

Modi: Make in India.
Pappu: Make (holiday) outside India.
Modi: Go digital.
Pappu: Go paper.
#EC #EVMs

If you go by circumstantial evidence…
AAP getting 67/70 seats in Delhi is the fishiest thing that has ever happened in Indian polls.
#EVMs

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Prohibition musings…

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crate-895939_640Prohibition is not the banning of alcohol.
It is merely the switching of superior legal alcohol with inferior illegal alcohol.

Hat-trick!
Morarji brought prohibition to Gujarat.
Nitish brought prohibition to Bihar.
Supreme Court brought prohibition to highways.

You can still drink and come to the highway.
Carry drinks in your vehicle.
Take a 500+ meter detour and get drinks.
Bootlegging?

A new generation of bars and restaurants 550 metres away from the highways with easy access lanes might start mushrooming in India soon.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru