The poverty of Pappu…

Pappu says poverty is a state of mind.
Let’s kick the Congress out in 2014.
Then tell him: You are PM! Power is just a state of mind!

Pappu: Poverty is just a state of mind.
Comment: Strange statement coming from a person who has little understanding of both “poverty” and “mind”.
Diggy Raja: In his mind, Pappu is demanding a separate state for poverty.

What if Pappu became a stand-up comedian?
Wait a minute… he already is!
Now all his speeches make perfect sense!

What he actually said…
Poverty is a state (that is here to stay and I’m out of my) of mind.

You should celebrate Friendship/Women’s/Children’s Day 365 days a year.
Like Pappu celebrates April 1 365 days a year.

Rich man: Aaj mere paas building-e hai, property hai, bank balance hai, bangla hai, gaadi hai, kya hai tumhare paas?
Poor man: Errr… errr…
Pappu: State of mind… state of mind…
Poor man: Par mere paas to kuch bhi bahin hai. Khaana bhi nahin hai babu!
Pappu: Confidence… confidence… confidence!!!

Dear Congress,
Jab Jab is desh main paap badhega tab tab jokes, memes, doctored pictures, spoofs, cartoons, parodies aur satires badenge.
Learn to live with it!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Ek rupaya main khaana…

Can have full meal in Re 1: Farooq Abdullah.
The real question is whether Farooq has ever seen a one Rupee coin in his entire life.

Price of a meal…
Rs 12: Babbar. (In Mumbai)
Rs 5: Masood. (In Delhi)
Re 1: Farooq. (In Kashmir)
Free: Pappu. (In Dalit home)
Next leader is what? Whenever I eat, please pay me.

When I was in school in the 1980s, a Rs 10 note got me a rice plate, a balcony ticket, one samosa and a return bus ticket.
Then the Congress had LS 416 seats.
Today they have half of that but double the arrogance.

Ek chutki sindoor ki keemat tum kya jano: (Om) Shanti (Om).
Ek rupaye ki keemat tum kya jano gareeb naagrik: (Oh God) Farooq (Oh God).

Sounds like if politicians stopped eating in five-star hotels, then the savings would feed the rest of India and the Food Bill wouldn’t be required.

Real debate…
Politician 1: This scam can be done in 1 lakh crores.
Politician 2: I can do it in 5 lakh crores.
Politician 3: I’ll do it in 12 lakh crores!
(Utne main bhi nahin pet bharega actually!)

All these politicians are bent on feeding us cheap food.
We should get them to eat a large slice of humble pie in the 2014 polls.

Some time back, Pappu offered a Grand Prize for the most idiotic statement.
The poor souls are still waiting for him to end the competition and declare the winner.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Thoda paisa, thoda khaana…

· The Congress couldn’t score enough poverty reduction schemes by 2014, so it introduced the Duckworth-Lewis method to meet its target.

· Very soon the Congress will declare that it is possible to survive on air alone and declare poverty 100% eradicated.

· Politician to self: Rs 1.76 lakh crore? Not enough. Want more.
Politician to citizen: Rs 33? More than enough!

· Once Raj Babbar was seen as the next Angry Young Man.
If he follows his own theories, he will be nothing but a Hungry Old Man.

· UPA sarkaar ke 12 baj gaye.

· The 2014 strategy…
Poor man: I am voting against the Congress.
Congress: But we have officially made you “not poor”, so vote for us now!

· Planner: How do we remove poverty?
Politician: Poverty hatana hamare haath main nahin hain, par poverty line to hai na? Hata do apne jagah se!
Planner: Gareebi hat gayi!
Politician: New slogan!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru