Some political musings…

Posted on April 26, 2016 by Sunil Rajguru

Kanhaiya is Trainee Kejri.
Kejri is Trainee Lalu.
Lalu. Lalu Jr. Lalu Jr Jr. Pasand ‪#‎AdarshLiberals‬ ki!

It takes roughly ten thousand hours of practice to achieve mastery in any field.
—Malcolm Gladwell.
FYI, I’ve been an MP for more than one lakh hours now!
—Pappu.

They ask: When will we have a woman on Indian currency note.
I ask: When will we have any man other than the Mahatma?
Right now he’s on Rs 10 right through Rs 1000!

Isn’t it Odd that AAP ads concerning only Delhi are appearing Evenly all across every State in India?
AAP = Aam Aadmi Pays for these ads.

Congress sinking.
Bihar, WB, UP, Delhi in a mess.
Their verdict: Modi will lose 2019.

Whatever anti-Congress revelations are coming out post-2014, everyone knew anyway.
Therein lies the real tragedy.
‪#‎UPADebacle‬

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Sinking Congressi musings…

Posted on March 29, 2016 by Sunil Rajguru

1977-80.
1989-91.
1996-2004.
Congress money tanks were always flush when in Opposition.
For the first time taps in danger of running dry.

Congress: How could you dismiss Uttarakhand Government? This is murder of democracy!
Modi: Abhi to party shuru hui hai!
Ye toh bas shuruwaat hai.
Baad main na kahana kuch bhi.
Pahale hi de doon warning!

Shashi Tharoor…
Would be United Nations Secretary General.
To Minister of State.
To Kanhaiya’s spokesperson.
What a fall!

Go figure…
Student joins campus in non-BJP State.
Joins Communist politics, quits in frustration.
Commits suicide when Modi is PM.
Verdict: Modi’s fault!

Forget the Congress, President’s Rule has been implemented around 75 times just when the Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty was incharge.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

How Congress slogans should actually change…

Posted on February 11, 2016 by Sunil Rajguru

Then… and…
Now.

Garibi Hatao.
Congress Hatao.

Wipe every tear from every eye.
Wipe every Congress leader from every State.

Ho raha Bharat Nirman.
Ho raha Pappu Nirman.

Poori roti khayenge, Congress ko jitayenge.
Poora scam ka paisa khaayenge, desh ko dubaayenge.

Kattar soch nahin, yuva josh.
Kattar soch, nahin yuva josh.

Main nahih, hum.
Hum gaya tel lene, sirf main.

Vote for calf and cow,
Forget all others now,
Vote Congress.
Vote for cow slaughter,
Vote Congress.

Jai Jawan Jai Kisan.
OROP Jawan MNREGA Kisan.

Indira is India and India is Indira.
Sonia and Pappu are India and India is Sonia and Pappu.
(That doesn’t make any sense. Well, this party stopped making sense long back.)

Congress ka hath, Aam Aadmi ke saath
Congress ka hath, aam aadmi ko thappad.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The politicians #AdarshLiberals love…

Posted on February 10, 2016 by Sunil Rajguru

India’s worst politicians at governance…
Anti-Modi Mamata.
Anti-Modi Lalu.
Anti-Modi Kejri.
Anti-Modi Akhilesh.
Verdict: Falling governance in India is Modi’s fault.

Bihar’s Lord of the Rings trilogy…
1. Fellowship of Nitish, Lalu and Pappu.
2. The Two Towers of Tejashwi and Tej Pratap.
3. The Return of the King (Lalu).

Crime happens.
1. Is criminal related to Modi’s party?
Yes = Attack Modi.
No. Go to 2.
2. Is State ruled by Modi’s party?
Yes = Attack Modi.
No. Go to 3.
3. Modi is PM. Attack him.

Congress, DMK, SP: Monarchy.
AAP, TMC, RJD: Anarchy.
ADMK, BSP: Matriarchy.

Jawaharlal Marx.
Indira Marx.
Sonia Marx.
Mamata Marx.
Jyoti Marx.
Arvind Marx.
The Marx Dynasty.
Ruling the world since 1848.

Global belief in Communism…
1848: 99% intellectuals. 1% people.
1948: 99% intellectuals. 50% people.
2048: 99% intellectuals. 0% people.

Schrodinger’s Pappu.
The whole world knows his career is dead.
Congressis think it’s still alive.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru