Tag Archives: Pappu

Another round of Congressi musings…

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1942: Congress launched Quit India movement against British.
2014: If Congress gets re-elected, many citizens may want to Quit India.

If Sonia Gandhi is the entire country’s mother, then it’s time every citizen got his or her share of the inheritance.

If and when Pappu becomes Prime Minister, some will call it an Obama moment.
But it will actually be a Kim Jong-un moment.

If the most powerful person in India is “unhappy” and “disappointed” all the time, then I guess the average Indian can only be severely depressed.

Congress leadership: We are ready to sit in the Opposition.
Andhra Pradesh MPs: We are already there!

Nightmare…
2014: Congress decimated, but a Third Front joker becomes PM.
2016: Snap polls. Anti-Third Front wave helps Congress, Pappu becomes PM.
Protests begin yet again.

Looks like…
1. Pappu has failed as General-Secretary.
Make him Vice President!
2. Pappu has failed as Vice President!
Make him Prime Minister!

2004-14…
Manmohan Singh is the messenger.
Sonia Gandhi is the message.
2014…
The voters finally have a message of their own.

Old Sonia = Old Congress.
New Pappu = Old Congress.
No dynasty = New Congress.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Musings on Pappu The Great…

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Nehru: Major leaders left him.
Indira: Split the party.
Rajiv: Halved Congress LS mandate.
Sonia: Could never become PM.
Pappu: All of the above?

Q: What is the escape velocity to rid India of the Congress?
A: Pappu!

Sad truth…
Modi: Mere paas 2014 hai, tere paas kya hai?
Pappu: Mere paas 2019, 2024, 2029, 2034… hai!

Pappu wants to learn from AAP.
Pappu + AAP = Paap.
Paapi pet ka sawaal hai!

Every time Pappu opens his mouth, Congress loses tens of thousands of votes.
2013 to sirf jhaaki hai, 2014 abhi baaki hai.

The Nehru-Gandhi dynasty desperately needs employment post-2014.
Pappu pet ka sawaal hai.

Pappu, please give extensive speeches in West Bengal, Kerala and Tamil Nadu.
Thanks to that, the BJP just might open its account in those states.

Pappu’s leadership is nonsense and should be torn up and thrown away.

At this rate just before the Lok Sabha elections, Pappu will call the Congress manifesto nonsense and say it should be torn and thrown away.

Post 2014, Pappu will act in a movie called Ek Tha Dynasty.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Raaj karega Pappu…

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India invented the Zero.
Then it re-invented it with Pappu.

Advisor: Every time you open your mouth, we lose 1000 votes.
Pappu: So what do I do now?
Advisor: No problem. You reached zero long back. There’s no negative voting, so lage raho Pappubhai!

The man who is writing Pappu’s speeches is killing him.
If he writes his own speeches then it’s a case of suicide.

In 2009, most constituencies Pappu visited voted for the Congress.
In 2014, most constituencies Pappu will visit will never vote for Congress ever again.

Pappu just gave his greatest speech ever on TV channels.
(Since there was no audio, no-one could quite find any fault with it)

Pappu has set the bar so low for himself that if he becomes PM, then his every little achievement will be celebrated with pomp.
Nice strategy!

Q: Pradhan Mantra kaisa ho?
A: Narendra Modi jaisa ho!
Q: Aur Pradhan Mantra kaisa na ho?
A: Pappu.

Diggy Raja’s foot partially eclipsed his mouth.
If Pappu becomes PM, eclipse will be total!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru