The difference between Narendra Modi and all the rest…

Congress leader…
Stage 1: The allegation is wrong.
Stage 2: The chargesheet is wrong.
Stage 3: The trial is wrong.
Stage 4: The verdict is wrong.
Modi…
Stage 0: Whatever allegation you’re going to make is correct. Hang him!

Congress…
They have 1969 (Gujarat riots), 1980 (Moradabad riots), 1983 (Nellie massacre), 1984 (anti-Sikh pogrom) and 1989 (Bhagalpur riots).
Modi…
But 2002 is a greater number than either 1969 or 1980 or 1983 or 1984 or 1989.

Congress…
Emergency, Section 66A, Article 356, Section 144, no elections for the Congress President when a dynasty member is around…
Modi…
Fascist! Dictatorial! No free speech in Gujarat!

Pappu…
What about work experience?
Not required. He is fit to be Prime Minister because he is well-meaning, inclusive and cute.
Modi…
His 11 years’ experience as CM proves that he is unfit to be PM.

Others…
There is no development in a, b, c… States.
Modi…
The development of Gujarat is not inclusive!

© Sunil Rajguru

The Modi wave is here…

Na billi hai na parcha hai,
Bas Modi ka hi charcha hai,
Jo na samjhe ye aaj bhi ye,
Woh to waakahi baccha hai.

Sheila: Agar Pappu fail na hota to main CM banti.
Harsh Vardhan: Agar Kejriwal na hota to main CM banta.
Kejriwal: Agar Modi wave na hota to main CM banta.

2012: Is Advani an alternative to Modi?
2013: Is Pappu an alternative to Modi?
2014: Is AAP an alternative to Modi?
Deny karte karte Modi ka ek term poora bhi ho jaayega.

Kejriwal wave in Delhi.
Modi wave all over India.
Pappu waves Congress chances goodbye.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

T-shirt ideas and counter ideas for Modi haters and fans…

Anti-Modi: Modi is a Fascist.
–>Pro-Modi: I am a Modi supporter and I am not a Fascist.

When Modi becomes PM, I’m emigrating.
–>If Modi doesn’t become PM, I’m emigrating.

The M in Modi stands for Murder.
–>The d in Modi stands for development.

Never forget Godhra.
–>They will never let you forget Godhra.

The Gujarat Model will fail in India.
–>Only the Gujarat Model can save India.

If Modi fails in 2014, then he’s finished.
–>If Modi fails in 2014, then India is finished.

What about 2002?
–>What about 1969, 1980, 1983, 1984 and 1989?

Don’t vote for Feku!
–>Can you really vote for Pappu? LOL!

© Sunil Rajguru

10 things that could happen if Narendra Modi became Prime Minister of India…

1. Every price rise, inflationary trend, national tragedy… would be prefixed with “In a blow to Modi…”

2. Every Government scheme would be prefixed with “Sonia unhappy as…” or “Advani disappointed as…” or Rahul angry as…”.

3. Some would be tempted to call him “Alleged Prime Minister”.

4. The media would announce that they are no longer government stooges but “proudly anti-establishment”.

5. The Ministry of External Affairs would hold Passport/Visa Help camps all over the country to help all those people who threatened to quit the country if Modi became PM.

6. The Modi Industry would seek FDI to keep afloat.

7. MPs would petition the Nobel Committee to revoke Barack Obama’s Peace Prize if he invited Modi to the US.

8. Critics would start counting the years in terms of AG (After Godhra).
For example…
Modi became PM of India in 12 AG.

9. His supporters would start calling him Mahatma Modi.
(Jab critics bina wajah ke use gira sakte ho, to fans bina wajah usko chadayenge kyun nahin?)

10. Alternatively, such scenarios could be also become common…
Anchor: And in a blow to Modi…
(Aide whispers into anchor’s ear: Sir no more Bharat Nirman ads. All Congress funding has dried up.
Anchor: Do you think BJP will do the same and oblige us?
Aide: Why not try it out?)
Anchor: And in a blow to Sonia…

© Sunil Rajguru

Anything to get rid of Modi…

They can’t ban Modi.
So they are trying to ban Modi supporters.
They can’t ban opinions.
So they are trying to ban opinion polls.

New Congressi theme song…
Ae mere watan ke logon,
zaraa aankh main bhar lo paani,
jo Modibhakt hue hain unki,
khatam karo poori kahaani…

At any time in a clock it’s either AM or PM.
At any time in the MSM or Social Media, it’s either AM or PM.
(Anti-Modi or Pro-Modi)

#KapilSibal challenges #NaMo to debate.
Problem: Someone in the Light Flyweight category cannot challenge someone in the Heavyweight division.

1977: Anti-Indira.
1989: Anti-Rajiv.
2014: Anti-Modi.
First time a whole election campaign is around the Opposition Leader and not the sitting government.

Modi 24X7, Modi Today, Modi Now, The Times of Modi, Modi Express, The Modi Times, Aaj Modi, Modi India, The Modi…

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The Chief Minister’s Speech…

In terms of drawing crowds at rallies at least, Modi is a Lakhpati.
Now he has to be a Crorepati at the ballot boxes to come to power.

Blockbuster of 2010…
The King’s Speech.
Blockbuster of 2013-14…
The Chief Minister’s Speech.

Most pro-Modi trolls are anonymous goodness knows who people.
Most anti-Modi trolls are public (and allegedly responsible) figures.

Use Feku kahate hai kyunki usne Pappu ke PM chances ko totally fek diya.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru