News in Limericks 7

There was this dude called Obama,
Who go the peace prize hey baba!
On peace how he did talk!
But he couldn’t walk the talk,
Palestine, Af-Pak, ISIS, Syria, Iraq…—What a world panorama!

There was this dude called Modi,
While campaigning there was a coverage OD,
But when he became PM,
He changed his stratagem,
And now TV channels are facing cold turkey.

There was this dude called Natwar,
Who suddenly shed all his dynastic darr,
He attacked the Queen Bee,
And little Pappu—yes even he,
And all the Congressmen are going grrrrrr!!!!!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

My Narendra Modi Columns before he became PM…

Will the Sangh Parivaar be ‘Modi-fied’ on May 16?
May 8, 2014, Sify.com

How Modi emerged as the great unifier
April 26, 2014, Sify.com

Beware! The Fascist dictator riseth!
April 26, 2014, Sify.com

Six firsts if Modi becomes PM…
March 31, 2014, Sify.com

Diary of a rabid Modi hater…
March 25, 2014, Sify.com

Leadership SWOT analysis: Narendra Modi
March 11, 2014, Sify.com

How everybody really loves Modi
March 10, 2014, Sify.com

12 Modi lies the media told you…
February 28, 2014, Sify.com

Any politician at fault? Just blame Modi!
February 25, 2014, Sify.com

Six ways Modi bypassed the ‘media’ to go ‘mainstream’
February 13, 2014, Sify.com

Narendra Modi in black and white
February 9, 2014, Sify.com

The 5 types of Narendra Modi haters
February 4, 2014, Sify.com

10 things propelling Modi to the top
29 January, 2014, Sify.com

The five types of Narendra Modi supporters
14 January, 2014, Sify.com

2013: The Year of Narendra Modi
09 December, 2013, Sify.com

Godhra responsible for Indian Mujahideen?
11 November, 2013, Sify.com

Narendra Modi’s 7 unifying themes
06 November, 2013, Sify.com

Son of the soil trumps shahezaada
01 November, 2013, Sify.com

Anti-Modi camp keeps upping stakes
30 October, 2013, Sify.com

BJP throws down its trump card
07 October, 2013, Sify.com

The A to Z of Narendra Modi
17 September, 2013, Sify.com

Modi’s 12 steps towards the PM’s chair
13 September, 2013, Sify.com

5 observations on the Amartya Sen controversy
26 July, 2013, Sify.com

10 reasons why people are scared of Modi…
24 July, 2013, Sify.com

Don’t worry, Modi is ‘just’ about to be nabbed
04 July, 2013, Sify.com

Modi’s ‘Rambo act’ is bad piece of journalism
26 June, 2013, Sify.com

Why I support Modi
21 June, 2013, Sify.com

10 things that Modi has already achieved…
10 June, 2013, Sify.com

The four stages of Modi’s rise
9 June, 2013, Sify.com

The Modi juggernaut has finally begun
9 June, 2013, Sify.com

7 battles better than Modi vs Rahul
4 June, 2013, Sify.com

The Modi battle is just hotting up
17 March, 2013, Sify.com

What if Narendra Modi is innocent?
11 February, 2013, Sify.com

Modi is the BJP’s only hope
10 January, 2013, Sify.com

8 things that Modi has triumphed against…
22 December, 2012, Sify.com

TV news media: Modi’s biggest friend!
24 October, 2012

It’s Modi versus Rahul in 2014
24 September, 2012, Sify.com

Why Modi can still be PM one day
18 September, 2011, Sify.com

Handbook for fighting 2014 general elections…

Want to be seen as secular?
—Attack Modi!

Nurture Prime Ministerial ambitions?
—Attack Modi!

Have zero development stories to boast of?
—Attack Modi!

Opinion polls show your party’s slipping?
—Attack Modi!

Want to please your party’s supreme leader?
—Attack Modi!

Told that there’s a Modi wave in the country?
—Attack Modi!

Tainted with a riot?
—Attack Modi!

Want to save democracy?
—Attack Modi!

Tainted with a scam?
—Attack Modi!

Want to take on crony capitalism?
—Attack Modi!

Part-time politician coming out of the woodworks?
—Attack Modi!

Hear that someone else has attacked Modi?
—Attack Modi!

Modi attacks you?
—Attack Modi!

Don’t know what to say?
—Attack Modi!

Holding a rally?
—Attack Modi!

You are Modi?
—Well the only thing left to do is to attack everyone else!

© Sunil Rajguru

NaMo NaMo musings…

“12 years a slave” to absolute hatred against Modi.
2002-14.

The Modi haters’ slogan…
Doodh maango to kheer denge,
Modi ko support karo to cheer denge.

Believer: Beware! The Day of Judgment is near!
Modi Hater: Yeah, May 16!

1998: I’m backing Vajpayee to keep Advani out.
2013: I’m backing Advani to keep Modi out.
2014: I’m…
Chhodo, chalo, jaane de yaar,
Abki baar Modi sarkaar.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The reality of the Modi-Pappu-Kejri media coverage through a PJ…

In an exam paper, Modi got 80/100 and Kejri got 0/100.
Kejri screamed, “Modi failed to get 100 by 20 marks!” a few dozen times.
Media reported: Modi failed by 20 marks.

Pappu couldn’t even give the paper.
Sonia said, “Had he given the paper, he would have got 100/100.”
Media reported: Pappu narrowly misses getting 100/100.

Final headline…
Pappu best candidate. Kejriwal best challenger to Modi.

(And that’s how we are comparing a man with Zero days experience as Chief Minister with a man with 49 days experience as Chief Minister with a man who has 4500+ days experience as Chief Minister)

© Sunil Rajguru

Just call it secular and wash away its sins…

In India, we have two pairs of glasses: Secularism and Communalism.
Depending on which pair you wear, the same thing can look totally different.
Note: The glasses are monopolized by one group only…

Secular X riot = Secular.
Communal X riot = Genocide.

Secular X Hate speech = Freedom of speech.
Communal X Hate speech = Fascism.

Secular X Very strong leader = Statesman.
Communal X Very strong leader = Hitler.

Secular X Journalist = Independent.
Communal X Journalist = Severe bias.

Secular X Gasbag = Intellectual.
Communal X Intellectual = Gasbag.

Secular X Corruption = Clean chit.
Communal X Allegations = Criminal.

Secular X Weak foreign policy = Diplomacy.
Communal X Strong foreign policy = Alarmist.

Secular X Status message = Power of Internet.
Communal X Status message = Section 66A.

Secular X Distorian = Historian.
Communal X Historian = Distorian.

Secular X Politician = Incorruptible.
Communal X Politician = Guilty.

Barack Obama X Revenge by voting = Secular.
Amit Shah X Revenge by voting = Communal.

Narendra Modi X Any good thing = Communal.
Sonia Gandhi X Any bad thing = Secular.

LK Advani X Rath Yatra = Communal.
LK Advani X Anti-Modi = Secular.

Any citizen remotely supporting Modi = Communal.
Any citizen soundly attacking Modi = Secular.

Post script…
India is a sovereign socialist secular democratic republic.
If he wins on May 16, Modi haters will declare India a communal fascist state.

© Sunil Rajguru