1. Kashmir War: October 1947—January 1949.
2. Rann of Kutch Conflict: April—June 1965.
3. Indo-Pak War: August—September 1965.
4. Bangladesh War: 3–16 December 1971.
5. Siachen Conflict: April 1984 onwards.
6. Kargil War: May—July 26 1999.
No such war/conflict began between India and Pakistan for 16 years 4 months @ New Year 2016 after Kargil.
That’s a new peace record.
Previous record was 16 years 3 months between Kashmir War and Rann of Kutch Conflict.
© Sunil Rajguru
Modi: Hum Pakistani Army se bahut pareshaan hai.
Nawaz: Kya batau? Main tujh se jyaada Pakistani Army se pareshaan hu!
Pappu reads headline: Modi-Sharif discuss ties.
Goes ballistic and says: Ye hai suit-boot-tie ki sarkaar!
#BiryaniWithNawaz
2013: Yet another Bad Corruption Day.
2014: Good Governance Day.
2015: Good Diplomacy Day.
PIA…
Sharif—Pakistan International Airlines.
Modi—Pakistan India Afghanistan in one day.
December 25 birthdays…
Christ. Newton.
Malaviya. Vajpayee.
Jinnah. Sharif.
How the conversation should have gone…
Mani—We will have peace if you remove Modi.
Retort—Actually we will now definitely have peace.
Mani—Why?
Retort—Because jokers like you have already been removed.
Today the headline of the Times of India Front Page Lead has 33 words.
I wonder if this is a new record.
#BiryaniWithNawaz
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
For citizens…
War? Indian soldier hai na!
Insurgency? Indian soldier hai na!
Earthquake? Indian soldier hai na!
Counter-terrorism? Indian soldier hai na!
Flood? Indian soldier hai na!
Any type of dirty work? Indian soldier hai na!
For politicians…
Punching bag? Indian soldier hai na!
Scapegoat? Indian soldier hai na!
Pak-appeasement? Indian soldier hai na!
Arre baba Indian soldier ko kabhi to defend karo!—Nahi na!
India’s motto…
The Indian soldier will always defend citizen, but the Indian politician will never defend him.
© Sunil Rajguru
Maybe the people spotted near the border were wearing Pakistani uniforms Made in China.
Next solution?
“Some unknown people wearing Chinese uniforms are being spotted regularly near the Indo-China border.”
Pakistan PM: Sorry sir, but I am not in control of my country.
Indian PM: Don’t worry. Neither am I.
#TheekHai
Aman Ki Asha is losing to Jung Ki Khwaaish.
(Maybe it’s always been like that since 1947)
Johnnie Walker…
Keep Walking.
The entire sum of the Indo-Pak peace process…
Keep Talking.
(While the results always go for a long walk)
Q: Since the public opinion is against talks with Pakistan, don’t you…
Congress: Public opinion? Woh kya hota hai?
Pakistan’s actions are unacceptable!
(Arre babu! Accept karke unacceptable bolne se kya fayada hai bhala?)
Sometime back on the phone…
Manmohan Singh: What should we discuss in the US?
Nawaz Sharif: Don’t worry! I will give you something to talk about.
On August 13, 1947, they were 40 million Indians.
On August 14, 1947, they suddenly became 40 million Pakistanis who virulently hated Indians.
Do you really expect sanity and peace to come out of this absurdity?
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Defence Minister: Some people dressed in Pakistani army soldiers’ uniform did it.
Citizen: Someone in the Prime Minister’s dress is ruling the country.
Foreign policies…
Theodore Roosevelt: Speak softly and carry a big stick.
Manmohan Singh: Throw away the stick and shut the hell up.
Jitna zor ye sab log Modi ko attack karne pe laga rahe hai, uska aadha energy bhi China-Pak ko counter karane main lagaate to hamari Foreign Policy effective hoti.
Forget Food Security.
What are you doing for Jawan-Kisan Security?
Q: Since the public opinion is against talks with Pakistan, don’t you…
Congress: Public opinion? Woh kya hota hai?
Pakistan’s actions are unacceptable!
(Arre babu! Accept karke unacceptable bolne se kya fayada hai bhala?)
These versions by Sunil Rajguru