What the Congress stood for in 1947…
Consensus.
Optimism.
Nation-building.
Great leaders.
Raj gaya angrezo ka.
Equality.
Secularism.
Socialism.
And in 2013…
Corruption + Crony Capitalism + Communalism.
Opportunism.
Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty.
Generations of decline.
Recession.
Emergency + e-mergency.
Scams.
Scandals.
© Sunil Rajguru
Congratulations! You are the proud recipient of a Bharat Ratna.
Here are the following terms and conditions that come along with it…
1. You cannot endorse Narendra Modi for Prime Minister in absolutely any way. That will severely devalue the Ratna. We may then consider withdrawing it.
2. You now rank seventh in order of precedence: Above CMs and Governors outside their respective States. That means outside Gujarat, you rank above Modi and hence he is beneath you and hence there is no need for you to endorse him in the first place! Plus if you visit Gujarat, then you will become below Modi, so under any circumstances, do not visit Gujarat!
3. You will sever all links (if any) with the Shiv Sena, the MNS, the RSS and any right-wing Fascist forces.
4. You will always be a paragon of secularism and shun anything to do with any form of communalism whatsoever.
5. This decision may be used for political mileage and we may invoke you in our election campaign.
6. We may be voted out in the next general elections and the next government may try to impose new terms and conditions on your Ratna. We hope then you will fondly remember who gave it to you in the first place!
Happy gloating!
Warm regards,
The Grand Old Party of India
This version by Sunil Rajguru
![rotkopfara-1633096_640](http://www.sunilrajguru.com/"wp-content/uploads"/2013/11/rotkopfara-1633096_640.jpg)
Sonia: I never wanted to enter politics. At times I feel like a caged parrot.
Manmohan: I am a caged parrot of Madamji.
CBI chief: I am a caged parrot of the PM.
Opposition leaders: We feel like caged parrots of the CBI.
Victims of Opposition leaders: We feel like caged parrots of…
© Sunil Rajguru
Main azaad nahin hu!
Army chief retire ho ke bhi mujh pe waar kar raha hai!
Nuclear Deal ki victory hai kisiko yaad?
Modi ka pressure ab sahan nahin hota!
Oil prices, inflation, high taxation ka magic wand kahan hai!
Hai hai abhi bhi sab #TheekHai.
Andimuthu Raja ye tune kya kiya!
Nahin! Main Coalgate aur koi scam ke bare main kuch nahin jaanta!
Shehzaade ke neeche kaam karne ke liye main tayar hu!
Information ka Right ko bahaar pheko!
NREGA ke oopar Food Bill? Ab tijori khaali!
G se bahut dar lagta hai… 2G, CWG, CAG, Soniaji, Rahulji…
Hazaron jawabon se acchi hai meri khaamoshi.
This version by Sunil Rajguru
My great great grandfather built the foundations of Independent India.
My great grandfather built the first floor.
My grandmother built the second floor.
My father built the third floor.
My mother maintained that floor quite nicely.
As for me, I think I’ll just relax on the terrace!
© Sunil Rajguru
Then: I follow the Mahatma.
Now: I follow the Pappu.
Then: Gareebi Hatao.
Now: Modi Hatao.
Then: Their PM most popular politician in country.
Now: Their PM can’t even win a Lok Sabha election.
Then: Congress President a post occupied by rotation.
Now: Occupied by one person for life.
Then: Jai Jawan Jai Kisan.
Now: Jai Sonia Jai Pappu.
Then: Ho raha hai Bharat azaad.
Now: Ho raha hai Bharat nirmaan. (Still under construction after 66 years)
Then: 197 Lok Sabha seats meant: Sit in the Opposition benches.
Now: 206 Lok Sabha seats means: Yay! We are the dictators of India!
Then: Few scams, few resignations.
Now: Huge amount of scams, a few resignations that are re-instated after some time.
Then: Felt the pressure of the aam admi.
Now: Increase the blood pressure of the aam admi.
Then: Saare jahan se accha Hindustan hamara.
Now: Saare jahan se accha Pappustan hamara.
© Sunil Rajguru