Today’s random musings…

Posted on March 16, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

There has been no growth in Pranab Mukherjee’s life.
In 1982 he was presenting the Union Budget.
After 30 years in 2012, he is still presenting the Union Budget.

∙ Congress ka TDS kat gaya: Will take support of unreliable Trinamool, scamster DMK or even goonda SP to stay in power at any cost.

∙ Earlier, everyone was worried about the health of Anna Hazare, but not the nation’s health.
Nowadays, nobody is even worried about Anna’s health.

∙ Kyun re mera electorate Rushdie Rushdie karta hai?
The Political Verses trumps the Satanic Verses any day.

∙ They said the Euro would be usher in Utopia.
But it has just remained a dreamy Utopian Union.

The problem with democracy in India…

Posted on March 10, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

Election 1: Vote for a party that’s bad.
Election 2: Vote for a party that’s worse.
Election 3: Vote for the worst party.
Election 4: Go back to step 1.

Actual problem…
Why are you voting for the party and not the candidate?

Those lucky children of the dynasty…

Posted on March 7, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

Life doesn’t give us all a second chance.

But Rahul will get at least 10 more chances to become PM.

(Read: Lok Sabha Polls)

P.S. Priyanka aur Robert ka number bhi aayega! Abhi haso, baad main jhelo.

P.P.S. 2012 main Pappu fail ho gaya, par agle baar zaroor pass hoga! (Nahin to uske agle baar, nahin to uske bhi agle baar… till 2050)

2012 Assembly poll result musings…

Posted on March 6, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

Maya: Sab Rahul ne bigaada!
Rahul: Ye sab Maya hai!

∙ Akhilesh: Mere paas UP hai, satta hai, power hai, , future hai, state main goonda log, minorities, even middle class, sab kuch mere paas hai… tere paas kya hai?
Rahul: Mere paas maa hai!

∙ The Congress glass is half-full/half-empty spin (Con)…
Detractors: The glass is 7/8ths empty
Cong: The glass is 1/8ths full.
(Roughly based on UP Assembly seat share)

∙ RAHUL will now stand for Rahul After Humiliating Uttarpradesh Loss.
Or maybe…
Rahul nahin Akhilesh Hain Uttarpradesh ka Lal.

∙ In UP, BSP will stand for…
Bahumat: Samajwadi Party.

∙ Looks like Rahul gave more speeches than seats that the Congress party won.

∙ How Rahul spectacularly succeeded…
Rahul through his aggressive campaigning opened the eyes of the voters to Maya’s misrule. That’s why they promptly went ahead and voted for the SP!

∙ The Law of the Diminishing Dynasty…
Rajiv: 404 LS Seats.
Sonia: 206 LS seats.
Rahul: Less than 50 UP Assembly seats (In alliance!).

General musings for the day…

Posted on March 2, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

∙ Happy First Anniversary to Sachin’s 99th International 100.
Will you have many more?
(Mark your calendar for March 12, 2012)

∙ Sachin will probably retire on an innings of 99 not out and then retire from international cricket to prove a point.
(Even if that takes two years!)

∙ It was probably match-fixing between BCCI and Sahara…
Pehele inkaar, phir pyaar.

∙ If Behenji, Amma and Didi get together, then the acronym will be BAD… hmmm…

∙ Old saying: The last straw on the camel’s back.
New saying: The last nuke on the world’s back.
Reference: The alarming danger of Iran building their First Nuke which will probably happen to be the 31,234th nuke built in the world.

∙ Strange UPA mathematics…
(272 Lok Sabha Seats=Half-way mark.)
114 Seats=Out of power.
145 Seats=Shaky power for 5 years.
206 Seats=License for Dictatorship.

Ai dil hai mushkil vote karna yahaan

Posted on February 26, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

In India every political party is as bad as the other.

The theme song for voting in India…

Please read to the tune of Ai Dil Hai Mushkil Jeena Yahan from the Bollywood film C.I.D.

Ai dil hai mushkil vote karna yahaan,
Zara caste dekh ke, zara wave dekh ke,
Ye hai India meri jaan.

Kahin corruption, kahin criminals, kahin dynasty, kahin sleaze,
Milta hai yahaan sab tarah ka scam, ik milata nahin candidate clean,
Insaaf ka nahin, kahin naam-o-nishaan.

Kahin political satta, kahin outrageous fatta, kahin chori, kahin criminal case,
Kahin daaka, kahin phaanka, kahin thokar, kahin loss of face,
Bekaaro ke hain, kai kaam yahaan.

Criminal ko candidate pukka yahaan kehate hans hans,
Khud kaate gale sab ke, kahe is ko politics,
Ik cheez ke hain kai naam yahaan.

Bura India jo hai kehata, aisa bhola tu na ban,
Jo jaise vote karta, waise sarkar paata, ye jahaan ka hai chalan,
Tadabeer nahin mil ne ki yahaan,
Suno voter, suno candidate,
Ye hai India meri jaan…

(Original Song: Ai dil hai mushkil jeena yahaan.
Film: C.I.D.
Year: 1956)

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Category Archives: Indian Politics