Category Archives: Indian Politics

Gettysburg Address reloaded for India…

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“Three score and five years ago our politicians brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in netagiri, and dedicated to the proposition that all politicians are created equal. This government of the politicians, by the politicians, for the politicians, shall not perish from the country.”

Since every politician from every party swears by this and is interested only in the welfare of politicians and not people, the names of the political parties and coalitions should actually be changed to…

United Politicians’ Alliance

Indian Politicians’ Congress

Neta’s Democratic Alliance

Bharatiya Neta Party

Communist Politicians of India

Communist Politicians of India (Max) (Max=To the Maximum)

Neta Dal (A,B,C…Z)

Netawadi Party

Rashtriya Neta Dal

Indian National Neta Dal

J&K Politicians’ Conference

United Front of Politicians

Left Front of Politicians

Biju Neta Dal

Bahuneta Samaj Party

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

To be or not to be, that is the question…

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Politics in India is facing Hamlet style dilemmas…

Karnataka BJP…
To split or not to split, that is the question.

Nitish on NDA…
To quit or not to quit, that is the question.

Mamata on UPA…
To exit or not to exit, that is the question.

UPA on explaining the economy…
To bullshit or not to bullshit, that is the question.

Planning Commission woes…
To shit (in such an expensive loo!) or not to shit, that is the question.

ACP Dhoble when he enters a Mumbai bar…
To beat or not to beat, that is the question.

Rahul Gandhi’s entire political philosophy…
To eat (in a poor man’s house) or not to eat, that is the question.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Indian presidential election snippets

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Mulayam feels no mamata towards her anymore.
Mamata will no longer be mulayam towards him.
Sangma ke sang na majority.
It’s National. It’s Democratic. But it’s no longer an Alliance.
Janata Dal “United” no more.
Pranab ko Lal salaam, Kalam ko aakhri salaam.
Royal Bengal Tiger and Marathi Manoos Tiger bhai bhai.
Pranab bhai sahib ke sang Behenji aur Pawar power bhi.
As a sideshow, the Modification process has begun.
Bas Yuvraj hi Mr India ban ke raha gaye.
“President of Congress” Rulez “President of India” OK?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Random black money musings…

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∙ Jitna White Snow Switzerland main hain, utna Indian Black Money to zaroor hoga us desh main.

∙ The Indian politician’s…
Ad jingle: Khaaye ja, khaaye ja, corruption ke gun gaaye ja…
Money anthem: It don’t matter if you’re black or white.
Slogan: Black power!
Favourite book: Black Beauty.
Favourite film: Black.

∙ The country is in its elements…
Earth (Coalgate), Fire (KG Basin Oil Scam), Air (2G), Water (Belekeri port scam)

∙ Overheard…
Citizens: Bring back money from Switzerland.
Politicians’ families: Bring Black Money from Switzerland.

© Sunil Rajguru

Where the mind is without fear remixed…

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With due apologies to Rabindranath Tagore‘s original, but something that is required in 21st century India…

Where the cartoonist is without fear and the satirist’s head is held high;
Where the Internet is free;
Where the protestor’s will has not been broken up
into fragments by narrow domestic politics;
Where online and print words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection and not persecution;
Where the clear stream of reason
has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead politicians;
Where every mind is led forward into ever-widening thought and action—
Into that heaven of freedom, let my country awake…