Tiananmen Square: Mild tremor in China, but massive earthquake outside China.
Tahrir Square: Strong tremor in the long history of Egyptian politics, but a perceived tsunami outside Egypt.
Times Square: Projected as an earthquake, but an extremely mild tremor for the Wall Street bosses.
© Sunil Rajguru
Pakistan to US: We have nukes, don’t mess with us.
India to Pakistan: We also have nukes, but we allow you to mess with us, don’t we?
China to world: Nukes gaye tel lene, we’ll mess with who we please.
Russia: We have thousands of nukes and nobody even notices us anymore.
Britain & France: What about us, we’re invisible nuclear powers too!
Israel, North Korea, Iran…: Me too! Me too!
US: Bachha log jhagadna band karo. We rule the world without using a single nuke.
(Hiroshima and Nagasaki happened in the last century).
Japan: Besharmo, ek nuke ka kya asar hota hai, koi hamse poochho!
Terrorists: Bhagwan ke naam pe ek nuke dede re baba.
Moral of the story: Everbody loves Dr Strangelove and they have learnt to stop worrying and love the bomb.
This version by Sunil Rajguru
Styles of government…
∙ First there was Monarchial Dictatorship….
People revolted and that became a minority.
∙ Then there was Religious Dictatorship….
People shook that off too and its impact has lessened.
∙ Then came Ideological Dictatorships like Communism….
The sham was exposed and they’re on their way out too.
∙ Also on the decline are things like Military and Aristocratic Dictatorships…
∙ While a majority of countries in the world have democracy today (the Economist Democracy Index lists only about one-third of the countries of the world as authoritarian regimes)…
…there’s still Economic Dictatorship (another name for the way Capitalism is practiced today)…
The people have finally risen against that and best of luck to them!
© Sunil Rajguru
… Rabbani ki jawani… Haqqani ki qurbani… Kayani ki manmaani… SOS to US… US to use Pak… Pak to use US… US-Pak useless… Amreeka-Pak bhai bhai… Amreeka-Pak bye-bye… ISI US you… Sab ka hai bhool… Ulta har usool… Khatre main sabki jaan… Phir bhi Amreeka mahaan… Doublespeak Wikileak… Come and take a peek… Obama ka drama… Osama ka hungama… Musharraf in a huff… International handcuff… Zardari harakiri… Pak terror baby… Deadly Headley… To be or not to be… Major Iqbal ka jaal… Sab hain behaal… Lashkar bas kar… Jeeta tera darr… Pak ka kata nak… Kya karega Barack… 26/11 nahin hai 9/11… Bhoolo 11/7 aur 13/7… Bharat chal hat… Stay in your rut… Dawood n the hood… Any moolah’s jolly good… Ilyas still the boss… India can stay cross… Osama se Pak O fasa… Terror itihaas racha… CIA’s no to ISI… ISI’s no CIA… Nuke ki bhook will puke… Zara tu ruk… Kam tamaam… Balm’s the harm… Kya cool hai hum… Barood, terror, bomb aur gham…
This version by Sunil Rajguru
If the ISI is declared a terrorist organization by the US…
ISI: But I report directly to the Pakistan Army Chief!
Pakistan Army Chief: But I report directly to the Pakistan President!
Pakistan President: But I report directly to the US President!
US President: Hey! But I report directly to… no-one!
Terrorism always comes to a full circle as the buck always stops at the desk of the US President…
© Sunil Rajguru
When we were small, we learned that Pakistan was named in the following manner…
P-Punjab, A-Afghan Province or North-West Frontier Province, K-Kashmir, S-Sindh, and istan-Baluchistan.
But today Pakistan’s identity seems to be defined by…
P – Pakistan occupied Kashmir
A – Army
K – Kalashnikovs and terrorism
I – ISI
S – Secession of Bangladesh
T – Taliban
A – America
N – Nuclear threat
This version by Sunil Rajguru