Death is always a second away…

heaven-5640540_1280You could be leading an unhealthy lifestyle that is killing you…

You could be the healthiest person on Earth and still get a killing cancer…

You may never get a major illness in your life and make a single mistake that finishes you off…

You may never do anything wrong and someone else’s mistake might kill you…

Maybe a past life’s bad Karma will finally act and kill you right now…

Maybe there’s a strong malevolent force above us that snuffs out life at random…

Maybe Death is actually a reward…

Whatever it is, stop worrying about Death and Start Living…

© Sunil Rajguru

6 things I wish would spill out from the online to offline world

Restart Button
I’ve made a mess of my life. Just press Restart and start all over gain. This project is a mess. Press Restart and we’ll begin from scratch. What if we could Restart college life, marriage, you name it…

Human Body Version 1.1, 2.0…
A human becomes an adult say at the age of 18 and that’s version 1.0. And hey man it deteriorates after that! The body, the energy levels, everything! It’s like going from Version 1.0 to 0.9 to 0.8… to 0.0 (death). Maybe when we become cyborgs, we will have a Version 1.1 or Version 2.0.

Search
Here’s something I wanted to show you in this book… I can’t find it. Where are my keys? Where’s my mobile charger? Can’t every thing in the house have a tiny tag that beeps when you key in its name to some device? What about offline searches for friends, events, restaurants…

Status Message
I want to have a Facebook style status message hanging over my head all the time like… “I’m angry”, “I’m hungry”, “I’m sleepy”, “Do not disturb”, “Need help”… That would save a lot of explaining. People would come straight to the point.

Undo
If not a full restart that will change everything, then at least a simple undo for the last stupid thing I’ve done?

Antivirus and anti-spam
An antivirus and anti-spam against all the people who bug me and bad events that are coming my way.

© Sunil Rajguru

10 programmes I once loved on Doordarshan…

sharp-1844964_640There was a time when Indian TV had only Doordarshan. Colour TV was difficult to imagine. A remote was an unheard of concept. And multiple channels? Ha ha ha!

Strange but true: This government owned unprofessionally run non-24-hour TV channel was all we ever wanted. For us, Doordarshan (or DD) was Santa Claus who had at least one gift for every person in the family. DD probably peaked in the eighties and after that satellite TV took over. Last month, DD completed 50 years.

Here’s looking at 10 of my favourite programmes in no particular order…

Weekend Movies: Our home box office
The high point of every week was the Sunday Hindi movie. No matter what they showed, you still looked forward to it. Blockbuster or flop, millions would sit glued to it week after week right till the very end. I never missed the weekly regional movie too. It was a glorious peek into the culture of every state and national integration at it best.

The World This Week: The ultimate news capsule
When this was first aired, we were all blown away. Nobody thought news could be so slick and sexy. Prannoy Roy became a superstar overnight. If you missed this, then you felt as if you had missed the entire news of the week. But if that was cream, then the 24/7 news channels of India today are definitely highly diluted and adulterated milk.

Buniyaad: Saas Bahu ka baap
There was a time when Master Haveliram and Lajoji were the most watched admired couple in India. This epic, from the maker of Sholay, spanned decades and we didn’t feel like missing a single episode. The first serial for me that probably became a habit. (I always found India’s first soap Hum Log a tad slow)

Bharat Ek Khoj: India’s history channel
Even if you didn’t like Nehru, you couldn’t dislike Bharat Ek Khoj, based on the book The Discovery of India. This serial, which lasted roughly a year, took you through India from the Vedic period to Independence without sounding like a history lesson.

Karamchand: Desi Sherlock Holmes
We heard at that time that Pankaj Kapoor became the highest paid TV actor with this serial and he deserved every Rupee. Just like Hardy’s “Here’s another fine mess you’ve got me into”, the eccentric Karamchand’s “Shut up Kitty” became a national rage.

Byomkesh Bakshi: Classy and gripping
I had never heard of Byomkesh Bakshi or Sharadindu Bandyopadhyay in my whole life but when I saw this Bengali detective serial, my first thoughts were, “It’s right up there with Sherlock Holmes.” Sterling performances by Rajit Kapur and KK Raina.

Quiz Time: The battle of the brains
For me Siddhartha Basu’s university quiz is still the gold standard for quizzing in India and he’s still the ultimate quizmaster. The suspense and drama beat KBC, Dus Ka Dum and Bournvita Quiz Contest all put together.

Mr Yogi: The original What’s your Raashee?
By 1989 standards, this was quite an exotic concept and Mohan Gokhale seemed like an exotic actor too. This was a fresh serial and Om Puri as the sutradhar excelled. Our bumbling NRI and his 12 heroines enthralled us.

Yeh Jo Hai Zindagi: The original laugh riot
Shafi Inamdar, Swaroop Sampat, Rakesh Bedi and Satish Shah were the perfect cast. The script was perfect. The comedy was perfect. Indian TV is yet to better this serial. We looked forward to what avatar Satish Shah would come up with in every episode.

Chanakya: Vedic magic
While we had heard so much about Chanakya and his Arthashastra, to see it come out on the small screen was really different thing altogether. The atmosphere transported us straight back to the Vedic era. Dr Chandraprakash Dwivedi was Chanakya incarnate.

…and 4 “imported” ones…

Secrets of the Sea: The precursor to National Geographic
Jacques-Yves Cousteau has no idea how many millions of Indians he introduced to the wonderful world of televised nature. In an era starved of good educational and enlightening multimedia this was an hour of pure bliss.

Oshin: The most famous Japanese girl of that era

The dedication and toil of this 7-year-old girl bowled all of us over. We cried with her and rejoiced with her. We grew up with her.

Jungle Book: Chaddi pahan ke phool khila hain…
The cartoon was good, the story was good, Nana Patekar’s voice as Shere Khan was good… but the only thing that sticks is the title song penned by Gulzar.

Talespin & Duck Tales: High octane adventures
Kids of today who have 24 hours access to multiple cartoon channels will never understand the weekly anticipation for these two serials. Disney’s wonders travelled all over the world in these adventures… and we travelled with them.

And to think all that on a Black & White TV!

© Sunil Rajguru

It’s so funny that…

* The real world full of rich colour, smells, tastes and unbeatable experiences is called the “off”line world.

* A PhD genius not using a computer is an “illiterate”.

* You never count your friends in real life but know exactly how many friends you have in each networking site.

* In the real world your parents may be the best of friends, but you’d hate to add them as friends in a social networking site even though you’ve added hundreds (or at least dozens) of people you just about vaguely know.

* In the real life if someone tells you that you’ve won a million dollars, you’d tell him to get lost.
But when you get an email with the same thing, you actually believe it.

* Chatting is not something done in real life over a cup of tea or coffee.

* If you saw someone slapping someone, you’d run away in disgust.
But in the virtual world, it’s OK to kill a few thousand innocent virtual lives and destroy virtual cities: All in a day’s work.

* You want to moonlight as a farmer, though only virtually.

* Recently, you have keyed in more words for “social networking” people you have never met than spoken words with your best of friends.

* The good ole solid reliable postal service that we used to exchange endless letters, greeting cards and packages is called “snail”mail.

* Something that keeps hanging, crashing, has to be continuously updated, spoils your eyes and fingers is cool while something solid and reliable and not requiring updates is not.

Which is the real world and which is the virtual one?

© Sunil Rajguru

Overheard on Facebook…

* My life is like an open Facebook, everyone knows what I’m doing.

* It’s not what you are thinking… we’re just Facebook friends.

* If you don’t like me, you can at least like my statuses.

* You call me your friend and never even bother to tag me!

* Nobody likes me and nobody even reads my Notes.

* I’m detoxifying my mind. I won’t log in to Facebook for a week.

* I haven’t seen you on Facebook for ages. Is everything OK?

* Didn’t I meet you in Farmville once?

* I never met her. She was just a Facebook friend.

* Sorry, but all our Facebook quizzes show that we are incompatible.

* Forget him, he’s just a mere Orkuter.

© Sunil Rajguru

4 reasons why this austerity drive should stop…

The Global Slowdown has been on for what seems like forever (in fact, the economy may even be on an upward swing now) but suddenly India is seeing a political austerity drive. The high and mighty will no longer stay in five star hotels. They will travel by economy class in air and also use trains. While some have welcomed it, I don’t support it at all. Here are my four reasons for doing so…

Whither Security?

Stop being partisan or cynical for a minute: I would want my Prime Minister and the top people who run this country to be safe. While the number of all-out wars may be going down in the world the number of relatively small-scale attacks is on the rise. When a VVIP goes by a private or Air Force jet, it is very difficult for someone to infiltrate. Not so with economy class. Any troublemaker could come as a passenger.
And if the VVIP is at risk, isn’t so the public travelling along?
Future Prime Minister potential Rahul Gandhi’s train got attacked the very first time he went austere. I don’t see this as a long-term solution.

Grave Public Inconvenience

VVIPs and the Common Man live in two different worlds. And rightly so! I remember from my college days, whenever the Prime Minister would visit Bangalore, traffic jams would see some people being stuck for 4-6 hours! Let them all travel in luxury helicopters all the time. Both worlds would be happy. Imagine if you were sitting in an Air India plane where the top five rows were reserved for security and a VVIP entourage:

1. Movement would be restricted.
2. All the airhostesses and stewards would be busy with the “front-seaters” and you might be left high and dry.
3. If the back loo was out of order, then you might not be able to use the front loo for security reasons!

They are entitled to it man!

The bigger the company: The bigger the perks. The bigger the rank: The greater the luxury. It’s as simple as that. It applies to every company and most governments in the world. India’s GDP stands at more than a trillion dollars!
That’s more than $1,000,000,000,000.
When the top executives of billion dollar companies travel in fancy cars and business class, what’s wrong with high-profile politicians doing the same? Whether you like it or not, they are the country’s custodians.

Whither Real Issues?

In 2009, Finance Minister Pranab Mukherjee presented a budget of Rs 1000,000 crore! Out of that about Rs 39,000 crore was for the National Rural Employment Guarantee Scheme, more than Rs 12,000 crore was for the National Rural Health Mission and Rs 15,000 crore plus was for highways. That’s what the Finance Minister should concern himself with. Roads. Agriculture. Education. Basic amenities… All this austerity and “no five star” talk will save a few crore rupees at best: That’s peanuts. By doing such stunts, attention is being diverted from the real issues.

Austerity, then, is a Red Herring.

© Sunil Rajguru