Tag Archives: Sonia Gandhi

Congress and its end of innings…

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Sonianomics…
Free food. Free cash. Free houses. Free insurance. Free…
Everything but Free Speech.

There ain’t no such thing as a free lunch!
—Robert Heinlein.
Free lunch is my middle name!
—Arvind Kejriwal.
LOL! Me free lunch, dinner and breakfast!
—Sonia Gandhi.

Modi wants to be PM…
#ChaiPeCharcha.
Pappu wants to be PM…
#GaddiPeBachcha.

Blame for India’s megascams, economy, problems…
10% Manmohan.
1% Pappu.
0% Sonia.
Q: What about the remaining 89%?
A: Modi hai na!

Last Congress majority government ended in 1989.
Last Congress minority government ended in 1996.
Last Congress coalition government ended in 2014?

Just treat all these non-stop Congress ads as something part of their “Farewell campaign”.

Janata Party died in 1980.
Janata Dal died in 1998.
Congress is desperately attempting suicide in 2014.

The problem is that the Congress party seems to have only one theme song…
“Gandhi baat, voters ke sangh karoonga main Gandhi baat…”

An Absolute flood of ads with the faces of Pappu, Sonia and Manmohan…
Main (Pappu) nahin, Hum (Pappu-Sonia-Manmohan).
#HoRahaBharatBarbaad

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Sonia musings…

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Sonia: BJP is a party of poisonous people.
+ Sonia: Power is poison.
= What Sonia really said: BJP is a party of powerful people.

It’s absolutely rare in the world for a pathetic orator to be the leader of a political party.
#SoniaGandhi

In Congress, MP stands for Master of Poison.
#Power=Poison #Sonia #Pappu

Power corrupts (UPA1).
Absolute power corrupts absolutely (UPA2).
Beyond that is complete annihilation (UPA3).

All Congress spokespersons play a game call “Passing the Foot in the Mouth Parcel”.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The best of the entire dynasty…

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Motilal: Nobody would have guessed that I would one day be associated with a powerful dynasty!
Sonia: Same here!

Nehru: I did states reorganisation.
Sonia: I’m starting it too.

Indira: I imposed Emergency.
Sonia: I tried it in Cyberspace.

Sanjay: I didn’t occupy the PM’s chair, but still was all-powerful.
Sonia: Ditto!

Rajiv: I got a solid mandate in 1984 and halved it 1989.
Sonia: I got a solid mandate in 2009 and just about may halve it in 2014 too!

© Sunil Rajguru

How India actually votes in the general elections…

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1951, 57, 62: Let’s vote for Nehru.

1967: Let’s give Indira a chance.

1971: Indira rocks! Let’s vote for her again.

1977: Indira is so arrogant. Let’s just vote against her.

1980: Indira wasn’t so bad after all. Let’s vote for her again.

1984: Indira is gone. Poor Rajiv. Let’s give him a chance.

1989: Rajiv is so arrogant. Let’s just vote against him.

1991: Poor Rajiv went. Let’s vote for Congress.

1996: What, no dynasty? No vote for Congress.

1998, 99: Actually, Sonia is still inexperienced. Let’s not vote for her just yet.

2004: Ah! Sonia is experienced now. Let’s vote for her.

2009: Sonia has done such a decent job. Let’s vote for her again.

2014: Let’s give Rahul a chance.

© Sunil Rajguru

Some Anna Hazare musings…

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∙LM Singhvi: I gave birth to the Lokpal Bill.
Abhishek Manu Singhvi: That’s nothing. I killed its effectiveness.
Anna: Wait for the Second Coming.
Lokpal Terminator: I’ll be back!

∙ Sonia: Now I’m ready to fight for the Lokpal Bill!
Anna: OK, wear the boxing gloves and let’s get in the ring.
Spokesperson: No. No. No. That’s against our sanskriti. What it means is that when someone else writes a speech, she reads it out and when she writes a statement, someone else reads it out. It’s nothing more than that!

∙ Maybe it’s all a problem of numerology while naming it the Lokpal.
Some alternative names…
Latepal… Lamepal… (go jump in the) Lakepal… Mockpal… (chaaku ki) Nokepal… Roke(sako to rok lo)pal… Tokepal… (un)Luckypal… Netapal… Votepal… Waatpal… Quotapal… (zero+joke)Zokepal…

© Sunil Rajguru

The wisdom of the UPA…

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It’s the economy stupid!=Economist Manmohan Singh made Prime Minister.

Love your enemy=No strong action taken against terrorists; China threat ignored.

Youth is the future=Rahul Gandhi is future PM.

Think before you speak=Kapil Sibal’s pre-screening of Internet content.

Speech is silver=Diggy Raja, Manish Tiwari & Co.

…and silence is golden=Manmohan Singh & Sonia Gandhi.

Black is beautiful=Refusal to expose Swiss Bank accounts.

With great power comes great responsibility=PM: Actually I have no real power and hence I have no real responsibility.

The importance of woman power=Sonia Gandhi president of the Congress party for record 13-years and counting, more than Mahatma Gandhi or Jawaharlal Nehru; dynamic Pratibha Patil made President of India; Sheila Dixit continues despite CWG blot.

Only the great defy gravity=Thanks to us you have continuous inflation, petrol hikes…

Get everyone on board before making a decision=Nobody is coming on board only nowadays! So from now on there will be no major decisions.

Albert Einstein said, “…the fourth world war will be fought with sticks and stones.”
If we have no breakthrough in the December agitation, then the fourth Lokapl war will also be fought with sticks and stones!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru