Tag Archives: modi

Advani and Modi’s PM dreams…

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Advani: From Giant to Pygmy…
1991: Future PM.
2002: Deputy PM.
2009: Shadow PM.
2013: Overshadowed by Shadow PM.

Jab tak sooraj chand rahega,
Advani ko PM ka sapna rahega.

Modi was dead and buried in 2009.
Congress self-goals have revived him.
So if Modi becomes PM in 2014, Pappu’s first statement will be…
Modi kaun laya?

If 10 RSS men are charged in a riot, then Modi is guilty and must be hanged.
If 10 Central Ministries are charged with corruption, then Manmohan and Sonia are squeaky clean.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Today’s partisan political musings…

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· Presumption of Innocence: The principle that one is considered innocent until proven guilty.
Presumption of Guilt: The principle that Modi is considered guilty until proven innocent.

· In the BJP, they had to coin the term “Namonia”.
In the Congress it already exists and it’s called So”nia”.

· Sir!!! Please be PM! Please be PM! Please be PM! Please be PM!…
‪#‎Pappu‬: Mujhe chhod do mere haal pe, zinda hoon yaar kaafi hai…
‪#‎Lootera‬

· Congress spokespersons’ logo…
Trolling India before the Internet was invented!

· Spokesperson’s XI…
Mani, Diggy, Tiwari, Jha, Renuka, Singhvi, Sibal, Tehseen, Khurshid, Nirupam, Narayanaswamy.
Congress all down before 2014 polls!

· Why does the Congress disbelieve that the BJP has so much support?
Today even if RJD was the main Opposition, there’d be a massive “Laloo for PM” lobby, so spectacularly has the UPA tanked.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Contemporary Knock Knock Jokes 17

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Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Laxman.
Laxman who?
Lax man the judicial system is, but the conviction finally came!

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Lokpal.
Lokpal who?
Look politicians will keep scuttling the bill again and again!

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
AMS.
AMS who?
MMS ke baad AMS, that’s what!

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Modi.
Modi who?
Muddy his name is still to some despite all the development and international accolades.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Some political musings…

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Superlatives
Fast. (Anna)
Faster. (Modi)
Fastest: (Vaghela)

What’s in a name?
It is no longer United. (The PM disconnected from the rest of the ministers)
It is no longer Progressive. (Suppressing free thought, an initial toothless Lokpal Bill, a communal Communal Bill, rejecting a strong Sports Bill…)
It is no longer a close Alliance. (TMC tantrums, DMK going alone in the local polls…)
The UPA is fast unraveling.
Un-united Regressive Mis-alliance anyone?

The fast and the furious…
Everyone’s either going on a fast or pulling a fast one…
The political landscape is fast changing and Modi is fast finding acceptance…
But the only thing that matters is that prices and inflation are fast increasing and the common man is plain furious.

If Tihar re-organized its management…
Head of Telephone Exchange: A Raja
Head of Tihar Annual Games: Suresh Kalmadi
Treasurer: Madhu Koda
PRO: Amar Singh
Editor, Tihar Times: Kanimozhi
Coming soon (unconfirmed) on a two-week training programme…
Kiran Bedi, Om Puri, Prashant Bhushan & Arvind Kejriwal.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye… (IPL remix)

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Please sing to the tune of Sab ganda hai from Company…

Cricket boat mein note, Modi pe khot, IPL pe chot,
Ghapla baar baar, jhootha hai karobaar, hain ye political war,
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…

Cricket ki sadan, sab kala hai dhan, rivals ki jalan,
Jhoothe hain hote, maange bas note, raho tum lotpot,
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…

Sab political parties ek, IPL pathshala main classmate, paise hi phek,
Cricket-fixing baar baar, betting ka karobaar, golmaal ka czar,
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…

Hazaaron hain raaz, dekho aas paas, paise ki pyaas,
Cricket boat mein note, Modi pe khot, IPL pe chot,
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…
Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai ye…

Spoof By Sunil Rajguru

(Original song: Ganda Hai
Film: Company
Year: 2002)

Cricketing Full Forms…

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Lalit Modi = Lakhs And Lakhs Initially, Then Millions Of Dollars Income

Shashi Tharoor = Sunanda Has A Sweat Holding in IPL. Tweeting Had A Really Optimistic Outlook Recently.

Sharad Pawar = So Happy And Relaxed At Developments. Personally Am Way Above Recrimination.

BCCI = Board of Control of Cricketing Income

IPL = Infinite Paisa League

© Sunil Rajguru