Shinde: I will crush electronic media!
Shinde: Now what!
Advisor: Sir, email = electronic mail.
Shinde: Genius! I meant social media!
What Shinde actually wanted to say…
I want to crush media (all of it)!
I want to crush Modi!
I want to crush RSS/BJP!
But I know we will be crushed in 2014!
Shinde: I will crush you!
Kejriwal: Total paid media!
I&B Ministry: We will unplug you!
Sonia: I am unhappy!
Modi: Hehehe, aap ko ye inaam mila inse mujhe barso tak attack karne ke liye?
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
· Online: Comment. Go to jail. Like. Go to jail. Share. Go to jail. Draw cartoon. Go to jail. Criticize. Go to jail. Joke. Go to jail. (OR Get blocked).
Offline: Murder. Be free. Rape. Be free. Scam. Be free. Threaten. Be free. Riot. Be free.
· India is a country where making fun of a criminal on Twitter or Facebook makes you a criminal.
· Instead of Free News: Paid News.
Instead of Free Speech: Paid Speech, meaning you pay a heavy price if you exercise your right of Free Speech in India.
· Free Railways WiFi will come with the message…
This bandwidth is brought to you by the Congress.
You aren’t allowed to criticize us.
Have a safe journey and avoid Section66A!
· If there was an offline version of Section 66A for politicians, all of them would have been in jail by now.
· Do you believe in Free Speech?
Hillary Clinton: No I believe in Expensive Speech.
(5 speeches per million dollars, to be exact!)
© Sunil Rajguru
…in front of Diggy Raja: You are RSS!
…in Cyberspace: That’s a hate crime!
…in Parliament: The BJP’s corrupt too!
…in front of Congress spokespersons: There is no corruption!
…in a nationwide agitation: You’re a criminal, off to Tihar!
…in a CAG report: The author has political ambitions!
…in court: The courts can’t decide policy!
…in front of the CBI: Err, isn’t CBI=Congress Bureau of Investigation?
…in mainstream media: Bias! Katju, where are you?
© Sunil Rajguru