What it really means…

Opposition holds Parliament to ransom. No proceedings for weeks.
What it really means: Is there any change in the functioning of the country? No. We are irrelevant and the country’s on auto-pilot. All we are interested is in making money and that is going on without any stalling, thank you very much.

I am innocent. You have no right to accuse me. I only believe in the judicial system. Let the courts decide.
Meaning: Hahaha! They’ll take a few decades by which time nobody would know what the real issue was. I love judicial delay!

Raids conducted at the premises of top leaders all over the country.
Meaning: This is just to shut you up. Kuch hone nahin wala. Even if charges are filed, look at the “Meaning” right above this one.

Today a rally is being held in the city to protest against the corrupt state government.
Meaning: To add to your woes of corruption, let’s add some big traffic snarls today.

We will hold a bandh today to protest against the economic conditions of this country.
Meaning: To solve big economic problems, let’s give a lot of little economic problems to the traders and people.

© Sunil Rajguru

Modern Indian Superheroes…

India gets its own brand of superheroes…

• Is it a lobbyist? Is it a spy? No it’s PR Woman!

• Hounded by the media, reviled by his opponents and painted as a vicious Dark Knight by sundry NGOs… yet Gandhinagar City turns to only one man for its development and progress… Modiman!

• Raja-man, Raja-man,
Does whatever a scamster can.
Spins a telecom web, any size,
Catches politicians, journalists and industrialists just like flies!
Look out!
Here comes the Raja-man!

• Some time back, the first Prime Minister of India took a Phantom-like “Oath of the PMO”…
“I swear to devote my life to the destruction of the enemies of the Congress… and my sons and daughters and their sons and daughters shall follow me!”

This Version by Sunil Rajguru

Random Thoughts 23

TV watching kills brain cells.
Sleep deprivation kills brain cells.
Stress kills brain cells.
Junk food kills brain cells.
Smoking, drugs and alcohol kill brain cells.
Certain cosmetics kill brain cells…
…are we already an entirely new human species of brain dead zombies?

• When you clean the cobwebs of the mind, what do you do with all the spiders?

• The time spent on communication in today’s high-tech world is inversely proportional to the quality of the communication itself.

© Sunil Rajguru

Landmarks in Indian perceptions…

1980. Bhagalpur Blindings: The entire police force is brutal.

1987. Bofors: All governments are corrupt.

1992. Harshad Mehta: Everyone in the stock market is a crook.

1997. Match-fixing: All cricketers are interested in only making money.

2001. Bangaru Laxman: All politicians accept bribes regularly.

2002. Godhra: Everyone in the BJP is a mass murderer.

2010. Swami Nityanand: All swamis are frauds.

2010. CWG: All sports heads are master swindlers.

2010. Adarsh: Top Armymen are as corrupt as politicians.

2010. Radiagate: All journos are crooks.

2010. Raja: Bhagwan bachaye… is desh ka kuch nahin ho sakta!

© Sunil Rajguru