· Congress releasing ABCD: Any Body Can Double-deal, where the party makes the whole country Dance to their corruption tune.
· Congress’ 1-2-3 solution…
1. Pranab crucial for chopper scam probe.
2. Pranab as Prez can’t be called to court…
3. …so chopper scam probe can’t be completed.
· Congress completes its “modernization” of defence forces…
Army: Bofors guns.
Navy: HDW-Scorpene submarines.
Air Force: Agusta helicopters.
© Sunil Rajguru
Om Shanti Om: Main hu King Khan, Shanti rakho.
Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi: SRK aur Yash Raj Films.
My Name Is Khan: My Name Is King Khan.
Ra.One: Main bhi Dabangg superhero ban sakta hu.
Don 2: The Chase Continues: Main hi Don hu, the other Khans are still chasing me.
Jab Tak Hain Jaan: Main bhi Dabanggwalah heroine se romance kar sakta hu.
Chennai Express: Shettybhai, Kajol ke pati ko chhod aur mujhe pakkad.
Happy New Year: Happy New beginning with Farah.
© Sunil Rajguru
C for Coalgate, Commonwealth Games, Cash-for-votes, Cement scam, CBI Control…
O for Oil for Food scam, Oil import (Palmolein), Ombudsman (Lokpal) not coming…
N for Nagarwala, NREGA State scams, No conviction No action policy…
G for Generations of scams since 1947…
R for Rajiv’s Bofors, our biggest brand name till date…
E for Emergency wanted again to wipe out all scams…
S for Spectrum (specifically 2G), Scorpene, Swiss Banks…
S for Satyam, S-band ISRO scam, Sukh Ram…
© Sunil Rajguru
Q1: Please give an example of one scam in the following ministries…
Finance Ministry: Harshad Mehta Scam.
Defence Ministry: Bofors
Power Ministry: Enron.
Sports Ministry: Commonwealth Scam.
Foreign Ministry: Oil for Food Scam.
Telecom Ministry: 2G.
IT Ministry: Satyam.
Industries Ministry: Cement Scam.
Civil Aviation Ministry: DIAL Scam.
Coal Ministry: Coalgate.
Mining Ministry: Madhu Koda Scam.
Agriculture Ministry: Palmolein Scam.
Road Transport and Highways Ministry: Highway Scam.
Tourism Ministry: Taj Corridor Scam.
Parliamentary Affairs Ministry: Cash-for-votes Scandal.
Health Ministry: UP NRHM Scam.
Shipping Ministry: Belekeri Port Scam.
Atomic Energy Ministry. Thorium Scam.
Space Ministry: ISRO S-Band Scam.
Minority Affairs Ministry: Wakf Land Scam.
Q2: Please give an example of one scam in the following States…
Andhra Pradesh: EMMAR Scam.
Arunachal Pradesh: PDS Scam.
Assam: Education Scam.
Bihar: Fodder Scam.
Goa: SEZ Scam.
Gujarat: Sugarcane Scam.
Haryana: Forest Scam.
Himachal Pradesh: Pulse Scam.
J&K: Recruitment Scam.
Jharkhand: MGNREGA Scam.
Karnataka: Bellary Mining Scam.
Kerala: Sex Parlour Scandal.
Madhya Pradesh: MGNREGA Scam.
Maharashtra: Irrigation Scam.
Meghalaya: Forest Scam.
Odisha:Paddy Scam.
Punjab: Paddy Scam.
Rajasthan:Vasundhara Raje Land Scam.
Tamil Nadu: Granite Scam.
Uttar Pradesh: Stamp Duty Scam.
Uttarakhand: Land Scam.
West Bengal: Purulia Arms Drop.
Q3: Please give an example of one scam associated with the following countries…
Canada: SNC-Lavalin.
Czech Republic: Tatra.
France: Scorpene.
Germany: HDW.
Iraq: Oil for Food.
Italy: Finmeccanica.
Japan: Maruti 1970s Scam.
Latvia: Purulia Arms Drop.
Malaysia: Palmolein Scam.
Singapore: Kuo Oil.
South Africa: Cricket match-fixing.
Sweden: Bofors.
United Kingdom: Jeep Scam.
United States: Enron.
West Indies: St Kitts Forgery.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
· 1970s: Ek ek ko chun chun ke maroonga: Dharmendra.
2013: Ek ek ko chun chun ke maroonga: Pranabda.
· Pranab and MMS are both Undertakers.
While one is allowing the killing of death penalty convicts, the other is allowing the killing of the government.
· Jailor: What’s up?
Death row inmate: I don’t know, I am feeling de‘Prez’zed nowadays.
· Congress logo…
When Governance Hangs, the Government Hangs.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
· Nitish: Ek mayaan main do talwaar nahi raha sakte…
Modi: Woh to theek hai, par doosra talwaar kahaan hai?
· That Modi is an extremely boastful character, especially when compared to Rahul!
(That Modi has many achievements to boast of and Rahul has none is a different story altogether.)
· Like Good Cop Bad Cop, Modi and Rahul play Good PM Bad PM regularly.
· Since we call him NaMo, why don’t we call the other guy RaGa?
· Action speaks louder than words.
In Rahul Gandhi’s case, his action is mute and his words say even less.
· Modi can’t spell agriculture.
Congress can’t spell grace, humility, honesty and maybe even governance.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru