Tweet Tweet na raha, censor censor ho gaya…

Posted on January 28, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

So Twitter has decided to block certain Tweets if required by law.

Many users are seething at this censorship.

Please sing to the tune of Dost dost na raha from Sangam…

Tweet Tweet na raha, censor censor ho gaya,
Cyberspace hamain tera, aitbaar na raha, aitbaar na raha….

Keemti Tweets mere apne dil ki, gaya tha jisko saunp kar,
Woh mere networking site tum hi the, tumhi to the,
Jo Internet ki raah me bane the mere hamsafar,
Woh mere networking site tum hi the, tumhi to the,
Saare bhed khul gaye, raazdaar na raha,
Cyberspace hamain tera, aitbaar na raha, aitbaar na raha….
Tweet Tweet na raha…

(Original Song: Dost dost na raha.
Film: Sangam.
Year: 1964)

This spoof by Sunil Rajguru

Where are we without the Internet?

Posted on January 18, 2012 by Sunil Rajguru

∙ When are you submitting your paper/essay/article/column/backrounder?
Please give me a 24-hour extension, Wikipedia is off today!

∙ If the Government bans Google…
…will industries like the media and academia come crashing down?

∙ If the Government bans Facebook…
…will a few million people in India feel empty, lifeless and go into depression?
Without social networking, will we become more anti-social?

∙ If the access to the Internet is cut off…
…will we feel badly stuck in the sticky web of the offline world?

C for Cyberspace, but C for Censorship?

Posted on December 12, 2011 by Sunil Rajguru

(The world’s largest democracy wants to regulate the world’s largest democratic medium…)

Kapil Sibal sahab: Whether it’s someone like you or someone like me,
Whether it’s grand Madam Sonia or the beleaguered Narendra Modi,

Whether you’re a bigot or trying to make your point pretty fairly,
Whether you’re pretty famous or just a piece of anonymity,

Once you get into cyberspace and make any opinion “simply”,
Get ready to be attacked and get it from all sides equally,

If a newspaper becomes trash the next day, in cyberspace it’s gone in an hour,
(Unless you keep digging it out of the grave over some perverse sense of honour),

Just take the criticism and move on, the Net won’t cut you any slack,
Otherwise just get out of cyberspace and don’t look back.

The UPA wants the 1984 reality in 2012…

Posted on December 7, 2011 by Sunil Rajguru

In Steven Spielberg’s movie Minority Report, the pre-crime division arrested people before they committed the crime!
The UPA is working on a similar technology by which all anti-Congress status messages, comments and photographs will be blocked even before they can be put up.
After Spielberg, the UPA is looking to better George Orwell’s Thought Police.
Nineteen Eighty-Four has come and gone, but beware of Two Thousand-Twelve!

The Cybernukkad…
What if a Government official announced at every nukkad in India that speaking against the government was banned?
What would happen?
There would be a revolution all across India!
So then, why are you trying to do the same at all Cyberspace nukkads?

How to catch the Internet with a Net…

Posted on December 6, 2011 by Sunil Rajguru

The Government of India has just issued an Order…

Book Facebook!
Catch the Twitter Twits!
Log the Blogs for libel!
Take the yahoo out of Yahoo!
Shoot the MSN messenger!
In short…
Fence Cyberspace!
Catch the Internet with a Net!

Overheard…

An IT Minister: All I’m asking is for half-a-dozen companies to sift through a few billion status updates, pictures and links every day and remove the millions of pieces of content that are offensive to us. How unreasonable is that? These websites, I tell you…

A Congress Worker: That’s against us… that’s against us… that’s against us… (after a few thousand “That’s against us-es”)… hey! that’s against a particular community! Now we have finally got our peg!

The Facebook Ilu Ilu song…

Posted on November 26, 2011 by Sunil Rajguru

Please read to the tune of the song Ilu Ilu from the film Saudagar…

Ilu…
Ilu ilu…
Ye ilu ilu kya hai yeh ilu ilu,
Jab news feed main koi status message aaya to dost ne kaha,
Ilu ilu… ilu ilu…
Picture dekh ke aaya dher saara maja, to bola ye samaa,
Ilu ilu… ilu ilu…
Jab koi virtual cheez achhi lagti hai, badi pyaari pyaari lagti hai,
To dost click karta hai,
Ilu ilu… ilu ilu…
Ye ilu ilu kya hai ye ilu ilu,
Ilu ka matlab I l you, I l you,
Ilu ka matlab I like you, I like you,
Hey I like your status, I like your pix, I like your comment…

Ilu…
Ilu ilu…
Ye ilu ilu kya hai ye ilu ilu,
Jab meethe status koi lagaye misri ki meesri ki meethi daliyon se,
Jab mast baharon ka mausam ka koi picture lagaye,
Jab link se aaye koi gyaan guru,
To dost click karta hai,
Ilu ilu… ilu ilu…
Ye ilu ilu kya hai ye ilu ilu,
Ilu ka matlab I l you, I l you,
Ilu ka matlab I like you, I like you,
Hey I like your status, I like your pix, I like your comment…

(Original song: Ilu Ilu.
Film: Saudagar.
Year: 1991.)