Category Archives: Short Takes

More musings of Pappu the Greatest…

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The diminishing dynasty…
Nehru: Ruled till death.
Indira: Ousted and returned.
Rajiv: Ousted in one term.
Sonia: Never made PM, but power behind it.
Rahul: Will never taste power?

Destruction ka dwaar Pappu sarkaar.

Ab ki baar Modi sarkaar,
Agli baar Pappu sarkaar,
Media ki pasand Kejru sarkaar.

The most successful Congress campaign slogan this time would be…
Agli baar Pappu Sarkaar.
(Would be valid in 2019 too)

After elections, AAP and Congress can merge to become Aam Aadmi Congress.
Party President: Pappu.
2019 PM candidate: Kejriwal.

NaMo: Maine use apni naani yaad dilaa doonga!
Pappu: Fail! Main daadi ko yaad kar raha hu!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

LK Advani fading musings…

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Abki baari Atal Bihari.
Abki baar Modi sarkar.
Went bhains in paani, for LK Advani.

Advani’s 2009 campaign…
Death to rapists.
Will bring back black money.
Manmohan is a stooge.
Still got plastered.
Moral: Don’t be ahead of your times.

Love triumphs over hate.
The Congress started by hating Modi and ended up loving Vajpayee, Advani, Jaswant…

Changing times…
Emergency: Advani looks down on Media.
Babri demolition: Media looks down on Advani.
Today: Advani-media bhai bhai.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Our dear ole accidental Prime Minister…

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Sanjaya Baru calls Manmohan Singh an accidental Prime Minister.
Par accident to India ka hua na?

Sanjaya Baru’s book is fiction: PMO.
That Manmohan was ever PM itself is fiction: Citizen.

Manmohan Singh’s biography…
The Accidental Prime Minister.
Rahul Gandhi’s biography…
The Accident.

MMS = Minion of Madam Sonia.

Baru ne kee MMS pe vaar,
Abki baar Modi sarkar.

Jag main sundar do hai naam,
Chaahe remote control kaho ya rubber stamp.
—Sonia Mata.

1992: Everyone knows Babri demolition planned.
2014: Breaking News! Babri demolition planned!
2004: Everyone knows MMS is Sonia stooge.
2014: Breaking News! MMS is Sonia stooge!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Modi general election musings…

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The BJP actually released its manifesto way back on September 13, 2013.
It was the shortest one ever and read…
Modi is our PM candidate.

Modi is like Windows.
The moment you take his name in a debate, the debate hangs and gets stuck.

Which is bigger:
Anti-Congress wave or pro-Modi wave?
Which is smaller:
Pro-Congress wave or anti-Modi wave?
Does it exist:
Any non-Modi non-Congress wave?

Modi hater: Do you think India will ever move on from 2002.
Correct question: Will the Modi hater ever move on from 2002?
Answer: No.

No agreement on…
World: Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?
India: Did Modi mastermind Godhra or not?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Abki baar Modia sarkaar musings…

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Abki baar Modi sarkar,
= Aakhri baar Dynasty ki sarkar.

Why not start campaigning for 2019…
Abki baar Modi sarkar,
Agli baar bhi Modi sarkar.

Ye manifesto kya cheez hai yaar?
Ab ki baar Modi sarkar.

The D4 slogan…
Ek, do, teen, chaar,
Ek, do, teen, chaar,
Chaaro milke saath chale to kar de chamatkar,
Par ye kya hai yaar,
Abki baar Modi sarkar.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

AAP election campaign musings…

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They claimed…
ABC of national politics = AAP, BJP, Congress.
The reality…
ABC of irrelevance = AAP, BSP, CPM.

Is thappad ki goonj suni tumne? Ab is ki goonj ki goonj tumhe sunai degi, sunai degi…
—Dr Dang.
Is thappad ki goonj suni tumne? Ab is ki goonj ki goonj tumhe sunai degi, sunai degi saare news channels par 24X7.
—Mr Kejriwal.

The pattern…
1. Kejriwal attacked.
2. Attacker thrashed by AAPians.
3. Modi indirectly blamed.
4. Attacker turns out to be AAP/ex-AAP/an Aam Aadmi.

If the AAP is a B-Team of the Congress, then Rakhi Sawant’s Rashtirya Aam Party looks like a B-Team of the AAP.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru