When Narendra Modi became Prime Minister in 2014, the first task he said to himself is, “I have to finish all my enemies for good.” So he promptly threw the national damaad Robert Vadra in jail and even opened up files regarding Priyanka Vadra’s multiple DINs and allocation of a Lutyens bungalow for her.

Modi then went full steam ahead in the National Herald case and also the AgustaWestland scam. That was enough to throw Congress President Sonia Gandhi into jail with a non-bailable warrant.

Former Prime Minister Manmohan Singh was investigated thoroughly in both 2G and Coalgate. P Chidambaram many allegations were also looked into. Both were summarily arrested.

Congress Vice President Rahul Gandhi decided he couldn’t take the heat anymore and so he abdicated and took a permanent vacation to Spain. Old fogies like Digvijay Singh and Mani Shankar Aiyar realized their game was up and sank into comfortable retirement.

Next in line was the mainstream media. All major media houses were investigated for financial irregularities, Income Tax evasion, foreign exchange violations, links with Pakistani sources and anything else you could think of.

As a result dozens of media moguls and senior editors were thrown in jail with extremely dim prospects. Activists and NGOs all across India found themselves totally starved of all support and faded into oblivion. The powerful Lutyens Club of the nation’s capital was finally busted and the so-called liberals and intellectuals finally decided to keep their mouths shut for good.

Modi surveyed his domain and realized that he was the sole dictator and there was absolutely no Opposition. And he was pleased. Fascist dictator they said! Fascist dictator they got!

However after that things did not go exactly as planned.

The Congress party elected Jyotiraditya Scindia as their President and Sachin Pilot as their Vice President. The remaining old fogies couldn’t take it anymore and all the deadwood was finally jettisoned from the Grand Old Party.

This duo rejuvenated the party big time and all the State units were in turn galvanized. All the party’s young talent came to the fore and as a result they started attracting youngsters all over the country.

All the anti-Modi forces realized that in the post-Pappu era, the Congress finally had a chance of winning and flocked to the revamped party. In a few years nobody recognized it anymore as it became a brand new party simply brimming with new ideas and new talent.

The mainstream media meanwhile was also purged and the new breed of editors decided to do some honest and serious journalism for a change. So instead of indulging in blind meaningless Modi-bashing 24X7 as their predecessors had done, they started doing prim and proper investigative stories.

That ended in exposing a lot of so called stalwarts of the saffron party and Team Modi suddenly looked very vulnerable. They also punched many valid holes in many of his schemes and plans.

Twitter India which had got totally bored of Modi’s unchallenged domain and was discussing Bollywood, food fashion and cricket returned to politics with a bang. They jumped into the bandwagon and started taking all these issues with great gusto. Suddenly Modi’s 22 million odd followers seemed like a liability.

So in the end the New Congress, the New Mainstream Media and even a good part of the social media got together and launched a blistering attack on Modi’s Prime Ministership with cold facts and great ideas for a change.

As a result Modi got a heavy drubbing in the 2019 general elections and found his political career as good as dead…

…

Then Modi got up in a cold sweat fresh from this nightmare and vowed not to take any concrete action against Congress leaders and his enemies in the mainstream media and make sure they were all alive and kicking in the 2019 elections.

In fact they were his best bet of securing a second term!

Thanks to their intensely vitriolic 14-year attack he had won the 2002, 2007 and 2014 elections in style. He probably needed them more than he needed them!

In fact during the Delhi Assembly elections, Team Modi members had engaged too much with the media and were seen on all the channels all the time. That led to Modi’s first ever electoral drubbing in his entire life.

For Bihar the most reliable pollster Chanakya was giving the NDA close to two-thirds on the upper side making them rank favourites. The final blow came when NDTV declared them victors in their exit polls! Imagine Modi and NDTV on the same side! Sacrilege! No wonder they got plastered in Bihar too and a convict like Lalu romped home!

Modi wasn’t really used to being the favourite and thrived as an underdog. He had to get back to ignoring the media and being hated and attacked by the media. He took steps accordingly. He just had to make sure that Subramanian Swamy wouldn’t throw Sonia and Pappu in jail before 2019 and he was appeased with a Rajya Sabha seat.

And Modi and media lived happily ever after!